I made no effort to keep the forest in tact as I ran through it. As Sam had been pulling out of the driveway, it was clear through his thoughts that he planned on calling Jacob to warn him immediately. I couldn’t blame Sam for the actions.

No matter what, Jacob was his alpha and his pack leader and he was bound by unexplainable forces to obey him. I couldn’t expect him to go against that just for my sake. It would be absurd. It would take bravery far beyond that any dog should be expected to have to go against their alpha. Loyalty was, after all, one of the most dominant characteristics of canines, right? Another dominant factor, especially in that of the alpha, was a temper. Bella had discovered that the hard way.

I wasn’t exactly sure what I was planning on accomplishing with this visit. Jacob’s fiery temper was already made clear to me, and now I intended on poking his inner beast with a stick? It seemed extremely unpractical of me. Almost suicidal, in fact. I began to regret not allowing my family to follow me there. What if things turned ugly? What if Bella got hurt again because of me? It was too late for them to be there immediately now. I had sealed my own fate, and now I had to face it.

What was I going to say, though? Could it be so easy as just presenting myself to her and telling her that I knew what Jacob did and I didn’t want her to be subjected to that? Would that be enough to convince her? What could I possibly say to convince her how serious I was. I considered for the tiniest of moments promising her the eternity she had always wanted, but then shook my head to clear the desperation. No matter how much I wanted her, I would not use her soul as a bartering tool. Without that, though, what else did I have? Sure, I had my irrevocable love for her and the promise that I would never give up… but I had lied to her in the past, so what should make me believe that she would be so quick to trust me now.

The chances didn’t look good.

For the first time, a new ‘what if’ presented itself to me.

I had been so bent on rescuing her, that I hadn’t considered the fact that she might not want to be rescued. What would I do if she said she didn’t want to return with me? I considered it for several miles before I decided that I would obey her request. If she had chosen Jacob… I would let her go.

I had to try, though.

By this point, several hours had passed and I was only about 4 minutes out of La Push. I began to panic, fearing for Bella’s life more than my own. What if she got hurt in all this somehow. I would do my best to prevent that from happening, but if it did I would never forgive myself. I had already caused her so much pain.

My nose wrinkled as I began to catch a new scent. The stench of dog hung thickly in the air, and I began to grow more wary of my surroundings. It would be all to easy for a small pack to pick me off right here in the woods before I even made it to Bella. I surveyed the air with my nose, doing my best to ignore the reek and focus more on the important aspects.

My heart filled with dread as I counted at least 12 different variations of the scent.

I hadn’t expected there would be more than three or four of them. I was more than outnumbered with 12 of them, but it was too late for common sense at this point. Reacting impulsively had gotten me into this situation, and now that’s all I could depend on to get me out.

As I neared the reservation, I became confused. I had expected to run into at least one werewolf by now. The air wreaked of their stench, but yet I hadn’t seen a single life form. I slowed down, surveying the atmosphere until I finally locked in on Bella’s scent. It was a light in the darkness. A single delight to the senses among a cavalcade of werewolf odors.

I listened intently for both physical and mental sounds that would alert me of another presence. I could feel the eyes watching me, I could smell them… just out of range for me to hear their thoughts.

They had definitely been warned.

A new scent began to mingle with the others, then. The entire environment was too calm for me to not smell the stench of conspiracy. Were they waiting to attack me from all angles, or trying to see if I was really stupid enough to come alone? Either way, they had me.

They had me, and I didn’t care.

The creaking of a door caused me to quickly turn my head to the left. Bella’s scent floated into the air and drew me around the side of a house where she stood with her back to me.

“Why did you come here?” she almost growled.

“I…” I started, taken aback by the harshness in her voice. “I lost you once, Bella. I wasn’t going to give you up without a fight this time.”

She didn’t move. She stood at the end of the porch stairs, her back still to me, her fists clenching and unclenching. “I think you should leave.”

It stung, I wasn’t going to deny it. I hadn’t prepared myself nearly enough for the rejection possibility. I wasn’t about to give up that easily, though. I didn’t know what I was going to say… but I needed to say something to make her give me another chance that I didn’t deserve.

“Bella… please, just listen to me.” I pleaded gently.

She turned on her heel suddenly, I half winced as I expected anger to be the dominant expression on her face. Instead, when I caught sight of her, my lifeless and mangled heart broke. It was almost unbelievable that my heart was still in tact enough for that much damage to befall it, but the heart wrenching look on her face was more painful than I could have ever imagined.

Her eyes were puffy, her nose was red. Tears streaked down her face and her nostrils flared as she fought to contain her emotions. More heartbreaking than any of that, though, was the faint purple bruise along her cheek. It would have been invisible to human eyes, but I could see it clearly. In only a few hours it would have manifested to be twice as large and a light blue color.

I choked on my gasp as I saw her, taking a step backwards. The devastation only lasted a moment before it turned into pure, gut wrenching anger.

“Where is he?” I spat.

She didn’t answer. She crossed her arms and took a fierce stance as she tried to harden her face. “Edward, you need to leave now.”

“Bella, he’s dangerous.” I pleaded. “I know that he was the reason you were in the hospital. I don’t want to lose you like that. I want you to be safe.”

“Edward… you left me! If you wanted me to be safe, you would have seen that your absence was going to cause the opposite! Yes, he’s dangerous, I know that, but he stayed with me when you left.”

“I know, Bella. I was wrong. I shouldn’t have left you and I know that my apology doesn’t mean much now… but damn it Bella, I love you.”

“So does he,” she countered, another tear escaping the corner of her eye.

“And what about you, Bella?” I said, softening my voice a noticeable amount. “Who do you love?”

She gulped, narrowing her eyes at me.

“Please just leave, Edward.”

“Come with me.” I pleaded.

“I can’t. I belong here.” She shook her head, dispelling several more tears with her actions.

“Please.” I said again, debating on whether dropping to my knees would add any effectiveness.

“Go home, Edward.” She said quietly.

“I am home.” I countered firmly.

She narrowed her eyes questioningly at me.

“My home is wherever you are, Bella. You are my home.”

She squeezed her eyes shut, a sob choking out of her parted lips before she could contain it. I took a step towards her, intending on comforting her in some way, but she held out her hand to stop me.

“No, Edward. Please don’t. I can’t… I just..” She faltered. “Wait here,” she instructed, turning on her heel and disappearing into the house for several seconds before emerging with a familiar book in her hand.

“Here,” she said, biting her lip. “This is yours.”

“It’s okay.” I tried, “You can keep it.”

“Please take it, Edward. Just take it.” Her eyes were pleading as she held it out to me.

I reached out a trembling hand to accept the copy of Wuthering Heights from her. She withdrew her hand quickly, not letting me touch her, and then backed away towards the steps again.

“Goodbye,” she whispered decisively.

“Wait, Bella, please…” I was grasping at straws now. I couldn’t leave here without her, especially after seeing the fresh bruise on her cheek. “I won't leave here without you.”

She winced, her fists clenching again. Her eyes fluttered closed and her eyebrows drew together in a pained expression before she finally choked out - “I have made a choice, Edward. Just like you made a choice when you left Forks.”

“And what choice is that?”

She hesitated, shifting back and forth for a brief moment, her breath coming in rapid and uneven gasps.

“I choose Jacob.” Her eyes opened again, meeting mine. Her chocolate brown eyes were set and unfaltering. They seemed lifeless and cold save for the tears still falling from them.

I heard something that resembled a chuckle from the surrounding area and I wondered for a moment how big of an audience we had at that moment.

I couldn’t believe she had spoken those words. I hadn’t prepared myself nearly enough for this rejection, and I felt my knees grow weak at the realization. I gulped back a wave of emotion as I stared back at her, feeling the expression drain off of my face. I shut myself down to feeling, then. I made myself go completely numb as I gave her a single, curt nod.

“I’ll be near by if you need me.” I said softly, trusting that she knew what that meant.

I started to turn to walk away, but stopped short, looking back at her momentarily as I added - “I love you, Bella.”

As I began walking away from her, I hear the soft thud of her knees hitting the dirt and a stifled sob, but no response.

Long after I was out of her sight, I walked at a human pace. I wondered if their plan all along was to wait until I was out of her sight before they attacked me. I didn’t care. Bella had chosen an abusive werewolf who she wouldn’t admit to loving over me.

What kind of monster was I that I was the lesser of those two evils? What kind of monster was I that I was actually leaving her like this. No matter what she wanted… I shouldn’t be leaving her in his hands. But then… I knew I couldn’t force her to do something she didn’t want to. She was a grown woman, and she was able to make her own decisions.

And she had decided on Jacob.

I walked until I was outside the La Push boundary. Only then did I turn around. 5 wolves stood in my wake, not threatening to follow me, but positioned as a warning on the borderline, daring me to return. As I turned, one of them - a large russet colored one with shaggy fur bared its teeth and snarled. I didn’t respond. I was too lifeless to care at that moment. I kept walking along the side of the road without really having a sense of direction.

It didn’t matter where I went anymore, though I knew I should go back to my family as I promised. I told myself that I wouldn’t put them through any more of my masochistic moping if things ended badly this time, and I would stick to that… but it would only be easier from a distance. I turned myself in the direction of our old home on the outskirts of Forks and broke into a run.

I would live there for as long as it took. I would keep my phone on me at all times and run the La Push border whenever I could, looking for any sign that Bella was alive and well.

I would do my best to look after her from a distance.

I focused on retaining the numbness that had saved me from breaking down thus far as I ran, though knowing that I could only hold of the pain for so long. As I neared the home, I heard the unexpected sounds of people moving around inside of it. Suddenly cautious, I crouched down and crept lithely through the undergrowth as I neared.

I relaxed immediately as the driveway came into view. My Volvo and Emmett’s jeep sat in the driveway, labeling the occupants of the house clearly.

“What are you guys doing here?” I mumbled, doing my best to put on a brave face for them as I reentered the familiar house to find them gathered, staring at me.

“You didn’t actually think we were going to let you come all this way alone, did you?” Emmett scoffed. “We left shortly after you did just in case you needed backup.” He shrugged.

“Oh.” I nodded.

They all continued staring at me, waiting for me to supply them with the answers to the questions going through all of their minds. All of their minds except Jasper’s, that is. He stared at me with his eyebrows drawn together in a concerned frown.

“Edward?” Alice urged. What happened?

I took a deep and shuddering breath, forcing my emotions back one last time before speaking.

“She chose Jacob.”