I LOVED IT! You ran the emotional gambit with this chapter. James was so icky creepy, but even weirder were Laurent and Victoria. The idea of them helping James do that was seriously disturbing. You totally creeped me out with that, so well done there. I noticed that you did not mention Victoria's dismembered body being burned. Hmm...are we saving more conflict for later perhaps?
I loved the emotional connection between Bella and Edward. That situation is almost unimaginable, but I think that you played it very true for these characters. I got all teary-eyed when Edward was trying to make certain that Bella wanted to be intimate. I loved that she found solace in his embrace and he found solace in hers. He needed to be the one to help her and so did she. Very touching. This is one of my favorite lines: "Stake your claim on my soul, Edward. I want you. I want to be your mate." Staking his claim, not physically, but on her soul. That is unbelievably beautiful!
I won't deny that I love me some smut, but their lovemaking was beautifully written. Very fitting, and then you make the distinction with their lovemaking and then loud "fucking" as revenge on Tanya. Perfect. Please have them do that every time Tanya shows up. Really make her miserable and have the couple compete in a new contest of which couple can be the loudest. Winner should get an island or something. ;) LOL!
You even got the humor in this chapter -- the boys thoughts to Edward are just hysterical. I love it that Edward and Bella are the first ones to be intimate. What a refreshing change. Esme is great when she starts to chastize Edward for their behavior, but then she figures out it's for Tanya's benefit, and then she compliments him. That's awesome!
Sorry but I have to quote you back to yourself now ...
"Is Tanya still here?" I asked.
"Um, no. She left after about the fifth ‘Oh, God Bella, yes!'" Rose responded with a cheeky grin.
"No, I think it was after the first time you delivered the f-bomb," Jasper teased.
"She looked pissed as hell," Alice added, bouncing up and down.
"Stop it, kids. Leave our brother alone," Emmett smirked. "But I do have to know, Edward. Was it as good as it sounded?"
Bella came and stood next to my side. I snaked my arm around her and pulled her to me, kissing her temple. "Absolutely."
I loved that entire exchange. The last line rocks! Very well done. Snortworthy as well as a guffaw or two.
Absofreakinlutely awesome job, Fangs! Can't wait for more! :D
Author's Response: Very perceptive about Victoria. We might hear more from her later...
I liked this chapter. It was very emotional to write, and I'm glad I was able to have so much of an emotional range in it. Thanks, and I'm so pleased that you liked it.
If you like this, wait until you read the next one, Insanely Romantic. It isn't finished yet, but will be soon.
I am also pleased to announce that when this story is done, there will be a sequel. I am out-of-town with another concert (this time, Richard Strauss's Ein Heldenleben), and it just came to me.
As always, thanks, Ms. Shrew, for your kind words and support.
