Lovely, your chapters are awful small. Just as I start to sink my teeth into them (if you'll forgive the pun), they're gone Also, for such small chapters I've spotted one or two mistakes in the most recent ones.
"Calmy" and "espect" are two that I picked out in this chapter - or, at least, they really stuck out, I thought.
This might just be a personal preference, but I love description. It is the peanut butter to my jam - the icing to my cake - the... You get the point. A little bit of beefing out (Seriously; what is with the food metaphors) in the description department would not hurt at all. Trust me. :)
I'm iffy with the inclusion of Evanescence lyrics. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love them. Hell, I can name almost every one of their songs from "Going Under" to "Your Star" to "Lies", but - and this is a big but - I hate the use of their lyrics in fanfiction as a general rule. I associate anything to do with them, or - say - Linkin Park, with emo w-angst. Quizilla may have spoiled me on that one.
Your OC seems fine as far as OC's go. Nice name. Long black hair + partial amnesia + making central to the plot (0r seeming to be; correct me if I'm wrong) starts to voyage into Mary Sue territory a bit. Be careful; thar be-eth dragons-e.
Apart from all that moaning, I quite enjoyed the story and would like to continue reading. ~
I know, they're small. But just think, if I cut them in half, that's all the more chapters!
My, you are the talker!! (Not to be taken as a bad thing, mind you!) Just reading that brought a giant grin to my face!
I know about my lame spelling, I'm not that great, plus my computer lacks spell check **glare**. Which is the reason I don't really submit chapters any more. Whenever I do get the time to type it all up, (And write them in the first place) they often get rejected for reasons such as grammer. I'm much better at "writing" correctly than typing correctly. Otherwise I would write more. So I haven't worked on my stories. If you follow me on Deviantart.com, you can find more of my work, and it would be much appreciated!
Yes, I sort of know what you mean about the lyrics. Sometimes, they sound completly stupid written out in a story.
Nice "old-talk" with the eth's I always love it, its hilarious!