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Reviewer: Vayls Girl (Signed) · Date: April 17, 2009 03:57 AM · On: Defection
The stream of superlatives gets longer! This is exceptional. Heart-breaking. Thankfully, knowing whats coming up, I don't have to wait in anguish along with Edward and Bella. But still I can't wait to see how you write the rest!
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
My hope is, though this part of the story is so heart-wrenching, that the knowledge of what's going to happen would soften the blow, as it were. All I can say is that you should hold onto that realization throughout the next chapter as well – it will help.
Reviewer: Naymee (Signed) · Date: April 17, 2009 02:23 AM · On: Defection
Your writing continues to thrill me. It's amazing. I just love being inside Edwards head, even when it's heartbreaking.
Thank you.
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
Reviewer: lada_8 (Signed) · Date: April 17, 2009 01:31 AM · On: Defection
This story is fantastic. I eagerly await the coming chapters. You capture Edward's mind so well. Though I'm curious about this explosion that seems inevitable in his emotions, I'm trying to remember from the book if it will be a physical explosion or purely metaphorical. You also capture Nessie so well, it's great to see Edward's POV because you essentially get everyones. One question though, when Rosalie thinks to Edward "look our for the dog" does she mean that in a caring way, like she has actually started to care slightly for Jacob but would never admit it outloud or is it in a warning, mean kind of tone? Anyway, just curious. I've always wanted to believe that Rosalie grows to accept Jacob as part of their family but would never admit it. Keep up the great work!
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
I would say that Edward's impending loss of emotional control is a combination of metaphorical and physical. He represses so much, I thought it would be inevitable that with the upheaval of his world it would, at some point, be too powerful to ignore anymore.
The coming chapter is my favorite thus far; I'm hoping that everyone enjoys it as much as I do.
Ah, Rose's parting words. Those were definitely spoken as a warning. She doesn't trust him around Renesmee, strictly because he is a werewolf, and she would prefer it if Nessie does not return his feelings of affection.
Maybe, at some point, Rosalie accepts Jacob as part of the family, but I personally think that it's a long time coming.
Reviewer: Cheyenne (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 11:16 PM · On: Defection
Excellent chapter, very sad. But incredibly well written, well done.
I agree with you on the coming chapters, i'm also looking forward to the introduction of all the visiting vampires. The great thing about writing from Edwards POV is the mind reading allows for a little more creative license. He gets to hear what the others are thinking unlike the original books from Bellas POV, which means you'll get to play around a little with unspoken conversations, which will make things much more interesting to read. And i have no doubt you'll do a fantastic job with it.
I have to say as much as i also anticipate the fire scene i am also looking forward to the chapters where Bella is off with J Jenks and Edward is left at the house, once being with Renesmee. You did such a good job at filling in the gaps on the previous chapters that i can't wait to see what you'll come up with for that. Although i have not written anything for this site i have done some writing before and it's always a thrill when you get to be a bit creative, so i've no doubt you'll have fun playing with Edward for those chapters especially as he's at home with all the visiting Vamps, so you have them to play about with as well. You have so much to choose from to write that i'm almost a little jealous. Good luck and well done.xxx
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
All the visiting vampires are a lot of fun to write. I've become quite attached to Kate, and a few of the others, as well. I appreciate your vote of confidence that I'll be able to keep things interesting with all the added characters popping into the story.
And I've been thinking about what Edward would be doing in those moments that Bella is gone. I have a couple ideas, but nothing really solid yet. Sometimes, I start writing, and the words just take me in an entirely different direction than what I had intended. I guess that's my muse letting me know where I need to go next. :)
Reviewer: dancing_in_my_underwear (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 11:09 PM · On: Defection
OMG What the hell?! We have no tissues in this house!!!! This made me cry. I can't wait to read happier times with the new vamps that are coming in.
Author's Response: Oh goodness, I'm sorry! I'd give you one if I could – a whole box of tissues.
I should probably warn you: you really should get some before the next chapter is posted. I know – I promised that the angst would let up, but Edward wouldn't let it just yet. The next chapter is my favorite, though, and I think you'll like it as well.
Reviewer: Starlight623 (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 10:47 PM · On: Defection
*sigh* Wonderful as always. The raw emotions in this chapter are just heart-breaking! Thank goodness I already know there's a happy ending!
Another fantastic chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
"The Future", "Defection", and the newest chapter, "Irresistible", are like a trio of emotional storms. By the time I finished writing the last one in the set (which is my favorite, by the way), my feelings roughly resembled a wrung-out dishrag. I had to take a little break to soak up some reprieve before I started writing again.
I'll be interested to see what you think of the new chapter when it's posted.
Reviewer: jazzy89 (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 02:27 PM · On: Defection
beautifully written, please dont keep us waiting too long for he next chapter :)
Author's Response: Thank you!
I submitted the next chapter for validation just a little while ago, so hopefully it will be posted in a day or so.
It's my favorite chapter so far. I'm curious to see what everyone thinks of it.
Reviewer: shelly551 (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 02:09 PM · On: Defection
LOVE THIS VERSION SO MUCH BETTER THAN BREAKING DAWN, I REALLY ENJOY EPOV BETTER THAN BELLA'S.IS THAT WRONG OF ME. WELL I TRULY ENJOY YOUR VERSION,KEEP IT UP.GOOD JOB
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
I think Edward's point of view can be more intriguing because he is more observant to detail, and with his gift, he can hear other's thoughts and add a lot more dynamic to a scene.
But I don't think it's wrong to enjoy his perspective more than Bella's – not at all. Truthfully, I'd rather be in his head than hers. :)
Reviewer: twilover09 (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 01:48 PM · On: Surprise
It was nice reading the conversations Edward and Bella shared, and they were important ones. I think it was very perceptive of you to include the conversation about the pregnancy because, now that I think about it, B and E just sort of left that strain in their relationship behind in the book and moved on into contentment, so it was good to have it here.
I will definitely check out "Safe", you are very talented and I would love to read something else by you!
Author's Response: What you said about Bella's pregnancy – how she and Edward never really addressed the issue – that's precisely how I felt. I wanted to have them come to terms with that strain in their relationship, and during this chapter it felt like the perfect time to weave it into the story line.
And please, do check out "Safe", and let me know what you think! That story was a bit of a challenge – in a good way – for me to write.
Reviewer: twilover09 (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 01:07 PM · On: Memories
I really like your take on the events going on at this point in BD. You definitely are portraying all of the characters exactly how I imagine they would behave and interact, outside of what we saw in the book. Good job so far!!
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Reviewer: nidka (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 11:03 AM · On: Favor
WOW! It´s all I can say. Extremely well written. Such detailed facts from BD.
You are doing an amazing job.
My favorite part:
You really are not a dog person, are you? LOL. Jacob is a crack up!!!
sincerely,
Karina.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Hee, hee... it's a lot of fun to play around with Jacob's sense of humor. I love putting in little comments that I would imagine him saying.
Reviewer: nidka (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 09:49 AM · On: Surprise
I extremely enjoyed this chapter. Like i said before all the datails make the difference.
I loved this part of the chapter:
"I used to think that my immortality would forever be limited to filling my expandable intellect with seemingly useless knowledge, if only to spare myself from the hellish monotony of my existence.
And yet, those ostensibly unending years of sequential self-torment eventually led my family to a small, cloud-shrouded town on the Olympic Peninsula, whereupon my fate became permanently linked with the one girl whose mind was hidden from me, whose blood sang to me with alluring sweetness, and who would one day possess my heart for all eternity."
So true. So close to character. So Edward. So well written!
sincerely,
Karina.
Author's Response: This chapter was a lot of fun for me to write. I'm glad that you enjoyed it so much.
And the passage you quoted, I love the phrase 'sequential self-torment'. It sounds exactly like Edward to me. So, I'm pleased that you feel the same way. :D
Reviewer: nidka (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 08:53 AM · On: Memories
Oh! I really like Seth too. You write him very true to character. I also like the way you tell little details in EPOV. Details we didn´t get at BD. For instance:
"The crystalline image of Bella projects into our minds, along with an imperious flavor to Renesmee's mental demand: she expects to be handed over to her mother straight away.
Rose sighs. All she wants now is Bella. It's to be expected, I suppose, but I wish... She chokes off that thought before I pick up on it, although I can probably guess how it would end. All Rosalie had ever wanted as a human was a prestigious marriage and beautiful children. By becoming Renesmee's caretaker – one of many, in fact – she has achieved a small piece of that deep-seated wish.
She knows, though, or can at least appreciate, that any child needs to be with their parents. As much as she wants to keep Renesmee to herself, she loves her enough to give her what she wants."
We all got that from BD but to really read it in full detail is great. You are very good at details.
Keep up the good work.
sincerely,
Karina.
Author's Response: Yeah, Seth is definitely growing on me. He's doesn't really pop up that much in the remainder of the story, but I had fun writing him, regardless.
And that passage about Rosalie, that was sort of my epiphany moment with her. Like with Jacob, I've come to have a new appreciation for her as a character, and I wanted to include that in the story.
Thank you so much for your review!
Reviewer: fanpier (Signed) · Date: April 16, 2009 06:00 AM · On: The Future
I read the whole story and really enjoyed it! You should keep writing more to it!
Author's Response: Thank you!
My plan is to write all of Book Three from Edward's point of view. I have about 15 chapters completed, and am hoping to get the majority of it finished over the summer.
Reviewer: jonesiia (Signed) · Date: April 15, 2009 02:34 PM · On: Awakening
Amazing, simply amazing.
Author's Response: Thank you!
Reviewer: twilover09 (Signed) · Date: April 15, 2009 01:41 PM · On: First Hunt
Another great chapter. Edward's pov is just so descriptive and enjoyable to read, especially of Bella's first hunt. So, obviously that means your interpretation of BD is interesting and fun to read too! :o)
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
Reviewer: twilover09 (Signed) · Date: April 15, 2009 01:06 PM · On: Awakening
Re-tellings of BD from Edward's pov are one of my favorite categories of stories to read on here, and this is one of the best. It's very detailed and analytical, just as Edward would be. I'm looking forward to reading the rest of your version.
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
I have to say that stories written from Edward's perspective make up the majority of my favorite fan fics, too. That's part of the reason why I decided to take on this project of interpreting the finale of "Breaking Dawn" from his point of view. I'm glad that you are enjoying it. :)
Reviewer: nidka (Signed) · Date: April 13, 2009 12:28 PM · On: Promised
Another great chapter. I´m loving your thoughts on how E reacted at this particular point in chapters of BD. The way he feels about Jacob is spot on.
I´ll keep on reading.
sincerely,
Karina.
Author's Response: Thank you!
I think that Edward will always have some prejudices when it comes to Jacob – and it has more to do with his personality rather than his being a werewolf.
Reviewer: nidka (Signed) · Date: April 12, 2009 02:27 PM · On: First Hunt
I´m liking your story more and more.
I like this part:
"My chest rumbles, and I throw my head back to release a spasm of riotous laughter that echoes among the towering trees. If I should live for a thousand years, I will never grow tired of Bella. She is my sun, forever holding me in orbit around her life-giving light. How foolish I am to think that I could ever predict this force of nature contained within the slender body of the woman before me.
What I should have been able to predict is that Bella is anything but normal. Even for a vampire."
You really nail down EPOV.
sincerely,
Karina.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Reviewer: dancing_in_my_underwear (Signed) · Date: April 12, 2009 02:07 PM · On: The Future
That is exactly what I thought Edward was thinking through that chapter. I almost started crying cause it was so sad. Can't wait for the next chapter.
Author's Response: Thank you!
Aw, so many of my readers fought back tears during this chapter. I wish I could give all of you a tissue and a hug.
Anyway, the next chapter should be up very soon.
Reviewer: nidka (Signed) · Date: April 12, 2009 10:20 AM · On: Awakening
I like your EPOV so far. I´ll keep on reading your story.
sincerely,
Karina.
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
Reviewer: badazzles (Signed) · Date: April 11, 2009 10:59 AM · On: The Future
Damn! You did an amazing job!!! This is great! That last line about got me! I don't know how you managed to get in edwards head but you have done it flawlessly. Please keep writting!
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Reviewer: badazzles (Signed) · Date: April 11, 2009 07:58 AM · On: Favor
I am hooked. I really love seeing threw edwards eyes. You have done a remarkable job creating his unique vision.... He catches so much more than bella, as he should.
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
I've always thought that Edward is highly observant, perhaps more so than some vampires, and I try to incorporate that into the story.
Reviewer: blue2185 (Signed) · Date: April 11, 2009 05:44 AM · On: First Hunt
Ya, its still SM's writing... I'm gonna continue reading though...
Reviewer: blue2185 (Signed) · Date: April 11, 2009 05:19 AM · On: Awakening
I like it but I wish you would have put your own thoughts and words into it; Not that I mind reading SM again, but it should have been your POV not hers. Great job though. I will defeniatly read more! On to chapt 2!
Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing!
Well, this story is from Edward's point of view during "Breaking Dawn", so I can't really change the overall flow of the story line. I do try to fill in some blanks in a few of the later chapters and add my own extra scenes, though.
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