So happy to see this story resuming!  It's very thought provoking and intense.

However...lol...honestly, I feel like the last paragraph in EPOV IS the truth of the story for me so far.  Edward's justifications don't make a lot of sense to me most of the time.  I definitely feel his pain but I really don't feel hopeful for them and it's mostly because of the fact that, as Bella stated, she loved and gave herself to him completely.  He admitted in this very chapter that starting a relationship with her was probably a mistake and that he would leave her in the forest again!  He would make the same choice that started this whole mess.  Where do you go from there?

He also admitted that she really wasn't a part of his family--or his REAL family.  Then how is she is mate?  If his feelings are so real and she is his mate then how could he leave and betray her over and over again?  How could he not watch over her, KNOWING the danger she was potentially in from other vampires?   And, of course, if his love was so real and pure for Bella then why did he give to Tanya something he had held on to for over a hundred years and refused to share with his mate? 

It is irritating that Bella even apologized at all for any activities with Victor.  Edward CHOSE to walk away from Bella without a look back and to be with Tanya instead and try to be happy.  Bella let Victor use her only after being rejected and abandoned by her mate (repeatedly!) who had moved on with someone else.  They don't compare at all and her apology just grated.  He got what he asked for.  I only wish Bella could have gotten more enjoyment out of it.

And if he loves his family so much and admires them then why would it be so horrible for Bella to be changed and be a part of the family as his mate?  He really hasn't done himself any favors here so far with his explanations, imo.  I'm with Bella in interpreting that his actions don't square at all with his protestations of eternal love.  His eyes lie as well as his lips supposedly did in the forest. 

It just comes down to the idea that if HE loves her and she is his mate then how could rejecting his own mate (who he KNEW loved him) be the right thing?  If HE was in pain, then why on earth would SHE not be in the same pain without HER mate?   THIS is where it is clear that she has always loved him more and wanted to give him everything of her love and devotion while he gave her nothing.  She would never have been able to leave him in that kind of pain.  

And if her human life was so precious, then how could he not want to know anything about how she lived it or if she was even alive anymore? 

Goodness.   This story is very engaging, intense and emotional.  I am actually hoping for something Edward says to make enough sense to justify his actions so I can root for him, because I want to.  But so many of his choices don't square at all with this tremendous love he keeps professing.  I don't see how she could really trust him with her heart again when all his choices around their relationship are led by his lack of respect and faith in the intensity or legitimacy of HER love, his dismissal of HER right to love the person she wants to, and his own selfish cowardice.   

And for him to say he would make the same choice that started it all again?  It kinda feels like Bella should let the end of this chapter stand and Edward can go and make do with Tanya again or some other substitute.  Edward is not a mate that she can count on to give her all his loyalty and devotion.  He'd survive and make do, just as he did before.           

What a fantastic chapter!  Ronan was perfect...he was furious and upset with Edward but also a good friend to him at the same time.  I'm still so disappointed that Edward got her to trust him and then left her like that, so desperate and vulnerable.  I can't imagine leaving someone I love in such need like that.  I understand what he was going through on an intellectual level but not with my heart.  Even though she does not blame him for it, I don't see how she can trust in his love for her or get past that painful blow to her fragile self-worth any time soon.   

Loved the poignancy of the end when Bella is driving to see Jake and says it will be her last confession.  Still wiping my eyes.  The suspense and build up in this chapter was perfect from a story standpoint and you're doing a wonderful job with the characterizations.  I've never experienced anything like what Bella and Edward have but I can feel it and understand their reactions and motivations because of your writing.  Thanks so much for updating quickly...love this story!

I'm really enjoying this!  It's really interesting to read about those missing moments that were lost with the Bella and Jacob perspectives of BD.  Thanks so much for doing this and posting.  You're doing a great job.  I'm curious to read more about how Edward deals with Alice and Rosalie too.

“You are so full of shit,” I informed him, my voice weak and thin, not only because I knew there was some truth in his words, but also because his willingness to fight for me threatened to take my breath.  Edward had never – would never fight for me.  He had flown to New York, saying he loved me, wanted me back, and claiming to have searched for me for months, but if Edward had ever really wanted me, he should have fought for me long before then.  Had Edward really been in love with me, he would have never fucked Skankya behind my back.  My leaving hadn’t made him realize how much I meant to him.  No, he was just upset to have lost his favorite toy, and the acknowledgment hit me like a physical blow. 

WOW!  That right there is exactly how I feel about Edward at this point.  I tend to favor Edward in fanfic in all his incarnations...and I definitely recognize Bella's imperfections and mistakes in this story but for me the onus is definitely on him in their relationship.  I went back and re-read his declaration to her after he found her.  He's trying to tell her he loves her, but then has to admit that the morning of the meadow he fucked Tanya because she wanted him to and wouldn't leave until he did so that 's why he did it.  Jesus, what a pansy.  A woman, especially one with their history, is supposed to try again and entrust her already broken heart to a man who doesn't have the spine to get a woman to leave his house without fucking her? 

I do think Edward has grown since they've been apart..at least a little bit.  I still get the sense sometimes that he misses her sexually more than her as a whole, I don't know.  I don't expect him to grovel at her feet and I definitely want her to take responsibility for her own shit but I honestly have a hard time thinking of how he could convince me (if I were her) to trust that he is capable of the level of trust and fidelity needed for a "real" relationship.  When shit gets rough, he seems so prone to just bail and do what makes him feel better (usually fucking someone else) instead of manning up and dealing with the person you're supposed to love.  Trust is so pivotal...if you're going to lay your heart out there you have to feel like your partner has your back. 

Eh...sorry for the long rambling.  Thought this was a beautifully written chapter and loved the progression of Bella's thoughts and feelings and how she is facing up to where she is and what she needs to do for herself.  So glad she is not gonna damage Jake to shore up herself but is ready to deal. 

So looking forward to the next chapter...thanks!

Am absolutely intrigued.  I like Tony's edginess along with his love/loyallty to his mom and sister.  Sounds like he has Edwards broodiness amped up with a temper.  Can't wait to see what happens!  Very original. 

Savored Every Word!  Awesome chapter, as usual.  I have to re-read them to pick up on everything.  It's tough to review because if I wrote down everything I loved or am thinking about it would be way long!  I really felt for Tony this chapter, especially when you think about everything he's gone through in his short life and the pressures he is under trying to protect his mother and sister, worry about Miri, fearful of the trouble that seems to be brewing on the horizon and feeling so isolated because of what he is.  So much to deal with and his hatred and resentment of Edward is easy to understand.  The crescendo of his thoughts before he pounced on Edward was brilliant. 

I'm so curious about what exactly went down with Victoria (?).  I don't know if maybe she had control of Bella when she was pregnant and kidnapped Tony for a time or what.  And who did change Bella?  If Tony did it unintenionally that might be another burden on his shoulders.  

Also very curious about what Edward is thinking through all this.  How much has he figured out?  It would be quite a leap to figure out they are twins with different growth rates.  He might see that Reni is his daughter since the age would be right but does he realize his relationship to Tony?  You did a fantastic job.  It goes without saying that I'm looking forward to the next one--