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Penname: gbasjw [Contact]
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Status: Member
Member Since: October 26, 2009

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Reviews by gbasjw
Loner by Nilla Rated: NC-17 starstarstarstarstar [Reviews - 9908]

Edward Cullen was a loner, an outcast. He clearly hated everybody, including himself. He was not a nice person. So, why was I so drawn to him? And why did I get the crazy feeling he felt the same way?

WARNING: This story will deal with the aftermath of child abuse and rape. If that bothers you too much, I strongly recommend that you don’t read.



Banner by steffyxxface

Thanks to steffyxxface for the lovely banner!

Categories: AU-Human Characters: Bella, Edward
Series: None
Chapters: 115 Completed: Yes Word count: 365612
[Report This] Published: November 13, 2009 Updated: July 06, 2011

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: November 18, 2010 Title: Chapter 77: Chapter 77

What an incredibly cruel thing to tell him after all this time. She couldn't just have a quick final visit & let him move on? Thank God Bella followed her intuition & is on her way back.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: November 24, 2010 Title: Chapter 78: Chapter 78

I'm drained from reading this chapter.  How twisted & sick is Victoria to continue to monitor Edward's case & then to drop the ultimate bomb on him?  Please tell me that Carlisle & Esme did not know of her connection to Edward.  I will have a very difficult time accepting it if they did.

Thank God Bella came back early.  She's only one who will be able to bring him out of this.  When will this poor boy ever get a break?

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: January 27, 2010 Title: Chapter 16: Chapter 16

Started reading your story based on the rec of KStew411.  I'm really loving it.  You are doing such a great job with the characters.  Can't wait for the next update.

Author's Response: People are actually reccing my story? Wow! I did not know that but it thrills me to no end. Thank you so much for leaving me a review!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: May 17, 2010 Title: Chapter 41: Chapter 41

So intense!!! I'm glad they are making slow, painful progress.  Babysteps.  I was so relieved that it was Edward waiting to see her.  Yay Edward once again!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: February 02, 2010 Title: Chapter 18: Chapter 18

Hats off to Kstew411 for rec'g your story.  Your Edward is so fragile it's heartbreaking.  I think your handling of the subject matter is very sensitive & beautiful.  I'm not expecting a miracle for poor Edward but please tell me these two get some less tragic episodes in future chapters.  I hate an Edward without hope.

Author's Response: There will be a happy ending, I give you that much. ;) I'm really glad you like it so far, thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: February 11, 2010 Title: Chapter 20: Chapter 20

Another phenomenal chapter.  I'd love to see Edward & Emmett's relationship become less hostile.  For all his smart ass comments, Emmett does seem to truly care about Edward.

Author's Response: I think you're right. ;) Thank you very much for reviewing.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: February 14, 2010 Title: Chapter 21: Chapter 21

I am so glad you are getting positive reviews on this story & that you are sticking with it.  Your writing is fantastic and has made me fall in love with these characters - regardless of the dark subject matter.  Another beautiful chapter,

Author's Response: Aw, thank you so much! :)

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: March 01, 2010 Title: Chapter 24: Chapter 24

This is by far my favorite FF.  These two are so sweet together it breaks my heart.  Thank you for the fabulous story.

Author's Response: Aw, thank you, I'm so happy you like the story so much!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: March 04, 2010 Title: Chapter 25: Chapter 25

Gah! Poor Edward - will he ever get break?? Please update soon, although I dread hearing what Carlisle is going to lay on him this time!

Author's Response: You'll find out soon... Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: March 19, 2010 Title: Chapter 28: Chapter 28

Another perfect chapter.  It's nice to see some positive movement forward for Edward even though he has such a long way to go.  I am amazed at how well you are handling the topic of child abuse - which is not easy to do.  The conversations between Edward & Bella are so poignant. Thank you again for being brave & writing this story.  I get so excited to see that you've posted an update. 

Author's Response: I'm so happy you like it. Thank you!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: April 02, 2010 Title: Chapter 31: Chapter 31

I so love Edward.  I love Bella too but he is just such a sweet soul underneath.  You write so well that I can feel his anxiety as I read your words.  So onward to another hurdle for the poor boy.  I think he'll get thru it OK though.  He really has made a lot of progress in a short time.  As always, looking forward to your next update.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! The next chapter will be up soon.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: April 07, 2010 Title: Chapter 32: Chapter 32

It was nice to have a chapter that wasn't totally angsty :)  Also very sweet to see some somewhat "normal" conversations between Edward & Emmett.  Maybe a bit of a breakthru there?  Edward still has so far to go but these babysteps are so gratifying to read.

Author's Response: Really happy you enjoyed the Ed/Em bonding. :) Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: April 12, 2010 Title: Chapter 33: Chapter 33

Yeah another chapter where Edward makes babysteps without a big blowup! I fear for the boy though when he starts to have physical feelings for Bella and/or when she tries to show him hers. He is so unprepared for either scenario. Love the single flower. Nice touch.

Author's Response: Thanks, I'm so happy you liked it. :)

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: April 16, 2010 Title: Chapter 34: Chapter 34

No need to be nervous about posting this chapter.  You did a phenomal job.  I admit I'm a little surprised that they got to this conversation so soon but I'm relieved at the same time.  This part is behind them now for better or for worse.  I am continually amazed at how well you write their dialog.  It is extremely difficult content but you allow the characters to maintain the innocence & hopefulness that is appropriate for their age.  Even Edward, with his self-loathing really still has that undercurent of youthful optimism.  He's allowing himself to be hopeful even if he doesn't realize it.   Bella is wise beyond her years.  I had no doubt that she would handle this revelation with grace & tenderness. She did not disappoint.  Just perfect.


Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: April 20, 2010 Title: Chapter 35: Chapter 35

You my dear are a spectacular writer.  Really.  This chapter was so touching & honest.  I think you are going to take these two to a higher place but in a realistic & meaningful way.  There are 3 FF that I drop everything for to read - Loner is one of them.  I am blown away again...

Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much for your kind words! And I'm so glad you enjoy my story.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: April 24, 2010 Title: Chapter 36: Chapter 36

Even though it was a struggle, Edward is slowly but surely becoming a bit more open & somewhat forgiving of others.  While Esme was emotional - I thought she actually handled the situation beautifully.  Despite his gruffness I think Edward was hearing her.

Edward is probably going to struggle more when he realizes that Bella needs some emotional support to deal with Phil.  She also is going to have a heavy load to carry with Edward himself.  I hope she finds someone to lean on herself.  She is going to need it.

Thank you!  Another well written, thought provoking chapter.



Author's Response: Yeah, things might be harder for Bella than she first thought. I'm glad you liked the chapter, thank you!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: May 04, 2010 Title: Chapter 38: Chapter 38

Sigh - I have a big smile on my face after reading this chapter. Such a sweet potrayal of their new romance & their mutual healing. I just love them together. Thank uou.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: May 08, 2010 Title: Chapter 39: Chapter 39

oooh, this chapter felt like ripping the scab off an open wound...I loved the last chapter but knew that the kiss would eventually take them into deeper issues.  Perfect portrayal as always.  Poor Carlisle, this man so badly wanted to be a good & decent father to Edward.  I can only imagine the horror & pain that he felt when he realized the Edward didn't believe anyone loved him.  Obviously, he had no idea about the level of Edward's self-loathing.  It's good this happened.  Edward needs more help than Bella can provide on her own.  They will be OK but Edward's issues won't be fixed overnight.  Great chapter.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: May 13, 2010 Title: Chapter 40: Chapter 40

Who is there to see her?  Is it Edward?  Or is it another Cullen?  A cruel cliffie....  Great chapter tho.  I know I say this every review but I love this story it has just the right mix of realism,anst, romance & drama.  You are such a good writer.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: May 23, 2010 Title: Chapter 42: Chapter 42

I love how Edward is starting to very slowly open up to his family as well as Bella.  I like how you handled the current conflict between E&B.  You captured the conflict without forcing Edward to push her away entirely.  I hope the little voice in his head with the positive messages starts to kick the evil James voice in the ass soon!

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: June 03, 2010 Title: Chapter 45: Chapter 45

I didn't get a chance to review the last chapter so I will review  for two. 

Wow.  Just wow.  So much ground covered here and even though it was feels as if Edward made tremendous progress in spite of the circumstances.  I love seeing the trust he has in Bella.  Thanks to Bella, he's starting to trust his family as well - even if he doesn't realize it himself yet.  I hope he asks to go to Phoenix with Bella...and that his family will let him.  This would be such foward progress for him.  She needs his support as well. I love this story because even though they have a long road ahead of them, they are hopeful ( yes - even Edward).  I love seeing Edward start to believe that there is more for him or even question the circumstances of his past.

I so love this fic.  It is far and away my favorite. 


Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: June 11, 2010 Title: Chapter 46: Chapter 46

I am so proud of both of them.  Bella for being wise & strong beyond her years & Edward for beginning to trust his family as well as Bella.  We all know he loves her but he's got a ways to go before he tells her.  I hope Bella is strong enough to absorb all that Carlisle has to tell her.  I think she is.  I have a feeling that the next few chapters are going to be really rough for both of them.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: June 12, 2010 Title: Chapter 46: Chapter 46

As painful as these chapters are to read, it is good to see that thru it all Edward is making slow but steady progress.  I'm wondering how Bella is going to be able to AZ after she hears what Carlisle has to say and Edward so clearly needs her now.  The next few chapters are going to be so hard....

Fantastic writing as always.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: June 14, 2010 Title: Chapter 47: Chapter 47

This story is tragic in so many ways.  However, I can't help but smile when it's so apparent that Edward means so much to his family & Bella. He inadvertently is bringing them all together as a solid unit.  They don't even see it themselves.  Bella is a huge part of that of course.  They are a very special couple - as everyone is realizing.  Thank you for updating so frequently.  This story is one of my favorite guilty pleasures.

Reviewer: gbasjw Signed
Date: June 26, 2010 Title: Chapter 49: Chapter 49

Good chapter that seems to pull a lot of pieces together.  I like that E is starting to recognize how important that he is to his family.  His real family - the Cullens.  Also, I like seeing Bella trusting Alice & being able to acknowledge that she will miss Edward when she goes to Phx as well as Alice's encouragement that Bella needs to tell Edward her fears about that trip,  Looking forward to the sleep-over discussion between E&B.  They continue to make babysteps forward.  All good.



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