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Penname: alicedances [ Contact]
Real name:
Status: Administrator
Member Since: December 03, 2008
Website:
Beta-reader:
Closeted Twilight fangirl. Can't admit to loving the sparklepire crack books for fear of ridicule at the hands of my friends. Most definitely can't admit to reading or writing Twilight fanfic. I'd never live that shit down. Ever.
In a nutshell: Canadian, mid-thirties, happily married with one fur baby (of the barking variety), business writer by trade (marketing, public relations, general communications), wannabe novelist.
Things I love: My boys (hubby and puppy) Sleeping in Traveling Taking pictures Reading Writing Editing (no, really!) Smut
Things I hate: My job (with the fiery passion of a thousand suns) Going to bed Getting up early Tomatoes Poorly written dialogue Bad grammar Real People fics (sorry, it's just a major squick of mine) Writer's block
Aaaaand... yeah. That's about it about me that would be of any interest, I think.
Oh, and, like every other fanfic writer out there, I live for reviews. Feedback, positive or negative (though preferably constructively so), is accepted with love. And cookies. Lots of yummy, homemade cookies.
IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT:
Did you know that every year over 200,000 children worldwide are diagnosed with a form of childhood cancer? We cannot ignore this shocking statistic impacting the youth of the world, and we certainly hope that you won’t either. We need your help.
Starting Nov. 15th, through Nov. 20th, you will have the opportunity to help in the fight against childhood cancer. Visit The Fandom Gives Back blog page (http://www.thefandomgivesback.com/) and auction board (http://thefandomgivesback.proboards.com/index.cgi).
Fic-wise, I'm offering up three one-shots, including two outtakes/alternate POV chapters from Maybe I'm Amazed - winning bidder's choice. I'm also auctioning off one photo from my website, the winning bidder's choice of picture and size.
So please. Bid on me. Don't make me look like a total loser with no bids. Pleeeeeaaaaase?? :)
My fics auction thread: http://thefandomgivesback.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=fic&action=display&thread=30&page=1#30
My photo auction thread: http://thefandomgivesback.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=photo&action=display&thread=69&page=1#69
Alex's Lemonade Stand donation page: http://www.alexslemonade.org/stands/19842
[ Report This]
Summary: 
Bella went cliff diving, but it didn't turn out so well. She broke her back. A decade later, Edward reappears in her life on the same night she loses her best friend and husband to a freak accident. Now a graduate student in Women's Studies, Bella isn't thrilled to see him. But when the Cullens re-enter Bella's life, they bring change, hope, and a new joint project that will require all their expertises.
Also, you can find a SPANISH version here:
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4829851/1/En_un_parpadeo
AND you can find images for various things like Esme's house, Edward's piano, Bella's wheelchair and Rose's car on my ff.net profile page:
http://www.fanfiction.net/~thatwritr
OR in my LJ gallery:
http://pics.livejournal.com/that_writr/gallery/000010z2
Special Update:
For personal reasons (a ridiculously full teaching schedule and being recently put in charge of a bi-annual local conference and ongoing project), I am no longer able to reply to reviews and questions. But that said, I wanted to give a BIG THANK YOU to EVERYBODY for the wonderful feedback and kind words that have been sent my way since the completion of this story in August 2009. I do still check my messages about once every 1-2 weeks and read *every* review. I just have too many to reply to anymore, but I didn’t want anyone to think I was ignoring her/him in particular, or didn’t appreciate readers taking time to leave a review. Writing this story was tons of fun and I’m thrilled readers seem to enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed the chance to write it. I can’t tell you how flattering that is!!! As I used to reply to all reviews, I feel a little badly about this decision, but work has been requiring virtually all of my time since the new (academic) year began.
Best to all of you in 2010 and beyond!

Categories: AU Characters: Alice, Bella, Carlisle, Edward, Emmett, Esme, Jasper, Other Character, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 68 Completed: Yes
Word count: 221619
[Report This] Published: September 11, 2008 Updated: August 26, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: July 11, 2009
Title: Chapter 49: Chapter 49
I've been reading this story since December, when Minisinoo recommended I give it a try, and I, in turn, have recommended it to many others. And yet I don't think I've left a single review, and my conscience is finally poking at me. I have to admit, it probably isn't something I would've given a chance if someone whose opinion I value so much hadn't suggested it, so I'm especially glad Min pointed me towards it.
This story is sheer brilliance. It's so very different from any other fic out there, and I'm blown away by the fact that you don't seem to have as large a following as you deserve. So I just wanted to let you know much I've been enjoying, despite my lack of reviews. Author's Response: Oh, wow! Thank you very much! How cool! I really owe Min for helping me with this. I'd never have got the plot ironed out otherwise, so I'm really blown away that you think it's good!
I think it calls into question some things in the book that some readers really like, and that's probably why it's not as popular. I can sort of understand that, although part of why I wrote it was because those things were bugging me, so ...
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: August 18, 2009
Title: Chapter 66: Chapter 66
I can't stop smiling. And after some of the angst I've been reading the last two days, I so, SO needed a happy chapter. Thank you. :)
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: August 26, 2009
Title: Chapter 68: Chapter 68: Epilogue
Absolutely loved it. Beautifully done. :) Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Summary:  Edward faces a monumental crisis and finds Sanctuary in the one place he refuses to look for it. All Human.
This story contains Religious themes and Mature themes: Edward is a priest struggling with his role in the Church and as a man.

Categories: AU-Human Characters: Edward
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 37 Completed: No
Word count: 99900
[Report This] Published: October 11, 2008 Updated: February 03, 2010
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: August 12, 2009
Title: Chapter 29: Bazaar
I don't think I've ever actually gotten off my ass to review this story before, but I just had to tell you how freakin' brilliant I think this is. I probably wouldn't have given it a chance if it hadn't been recommended by a friend whose taste I trust (Minisinoo), so I'm incredibly glad she sent me this way, back when I first started poking around this fandom.
This story is simply fantastic. I really have no words beyond that, and I'm sorry, because it deserves so much more than that.
Summary: So, can men and women really be friends? Edward Masen thinks so, and he's determined to prove it to the new woman in his life. Edward Masen is a professor at the University of Oklahoma who is dedicated to his work and his family. His niece, little Lilly Whitlock, is a first grader with a particularly pretty teacher named Isabella Swan. Edward then struggles to keep his relationship with Isabella strictly on the friendship level, which proves to be difficult the more they get to know each other.
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Bella, Edward
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 16 Completed: No
Word count: 66524
[Report This] Published: October 29, 2008 Updated: November 30, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 05, 2009
Title: Chapter 10: Chapter 10: A Female Friend
I loved the lobster reference. My hubby and I still call each other "Lobster" when we're being silly.
Summary: AU Human fic. Bella is a freshman in college, trying to muddle her way through, when she meets some special people. (Edward/Bella)
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Alice, Angela, Bella, Ben, Carlisle, Charlie, Edward, Jacob, Mike
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 17 Completed: No
Word count: 103480
[Report This] Published: December 02, 2008 Updated: January 12, 2011
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: February 19, 2010
Title: Chapter 15: Chapter 15
I'm SO glad you're working on this story again. It's one of the first AH Twifics I ever read; I loved it then, I love it now. :)
Summary: 
Edward,Bella, and Jacob are childhood friends who are now college roommates. Edward, who only seems to care about one-night stands and his band with Emmett and Jasper, and Bella, who has always been studious and responsible, are constantly at odds with each other. But everything is not always as it seems...
Banner by alicecullentwin
Categories: AU-Human Characters: None
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 17 Completed: No
Word count: 85140
[Report This] Published: December 10, 2008 Updated: July 04, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: July 05, 2009
Title: Chapter 17: Mr. Brightside
I've loved this story forever. So glad to see an update! Just... please don't let her be having a miscarriage. I'm getting so tired of pregnancies popping up in otherwise brilliant stories.
Summary: Jasper, Rosalie, Bella, Alice, Emmett & Edward become interwoven, making their mark at Seattle's Fremont Park Preparatory boarding school. Wealth and war, friendship and love ensue.

AU/AH. Rated M for language and sexual themes. Slightly OOC.
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Alice, Bella, Edward, Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 28 Completed: No
Word count: 146911
[Report This] Published: December 19, 2008 Updated: September 12, 2010
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 17, 2009
Title: Chapter 23: For Want of a Nail
Poor broken Bella.
I've been following this story for a while now, and I just have to tell you I'm loving it. Keep up the awesome work! :) Author's Response: Thank you so much for letting me know you've been reading G&B and for the encouragement and accolades!
If you'd like the EPOV outtake Lavender's Blue, please PM your email address to me and I'll send a PDF your way. I promise to use the email you provide only this one time. Thank you so much again, RAE
(Email should look like this ilovegabcotp[at]yahoo[dot]com)!!!!!!
Summary:

Bella Swan is accident prone and always in need of rescuing. Sexy neighbour Edward Masen is an EMT and more than willing to handle the job.
THANKS TO FALCONCRANELOVE FOR THE WONDERFUL BANNERS!

Categories: AU-Human Characters: Alice, Bella, Carlisle, Charlie, Edward, Emmett, Esme, James, Jasper, Mike, Renee, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 33 Completed: No
Word count: 100511
[Report This] Published: December 21, 2008 Updated: November 10, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 20, 2009
Title: Chapter 23: Chapter 23
Timmy's coffee works as a bribe for most people. **nods** Author's Response: Edward can be bought folks *winks*
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: June 09, 2009
Title: Chapter 28: Chapter 28
First of all, WOW. I'd like Edward to perform like that for me, thanks. And second, thank you so much for the rec! :)
Summary: It's been three long years since Edward left Bella, and things within The Cullen family have changed epically. After Edward's final stand off with Victoria, Emmett is left heartbroken and alone. A chance vision sends him back to Forks, and into the healing arms of the one person he never expected. Why fight with fate?
New Moon AU - Bella/Emmett.

Categories: New Moon, Eclipse, AU Characters: Alec, Alice, Angela, Aro, Bella, Caius, Carlisle, Carmen, Charlie, Demetri, Edward, Eleazar, Emmett, Esme, Felix, Irina, Jacob, Jane, Jasper, Kate, Laurent, Leah, Marcus, Renee, Rosalie, Sam, Tanya
Challenges: Series: Emmett Stories
Chapters: 23 Completed: No
Word count: 64433
[Report This] Published: January 13, 2009 Updated: February 22, 2011
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 07, 2009
Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8 - This Time
Dirty empath and his nympho pixie.
That line had me howling. Nicely done. :)
Summary: 
'There may often be a great deal more suffered than a stander-by can judge'. Edward and Bella, both with pasts that haunt them, meet at the worst possible setting. Will they ever see the other clearly? AH Canon pairings. No cutting- 2 scenes mimc the act but it is NOT self harming.
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Alice, Bella, Edward, Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 12 Completed: No
Word count: 47704
[Report This] Published: February 18, 2009 Updated: June 04, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 25, 2009
Title: Chapter 10: Eris and Harmonia
Definitely deserves some reviews!
I wasn't sure where you were going with this, what with Bella being a nutjob and Edward being a douche. But I'm glad I've stuck it out and kept reading, because I'm quite enjoying this. :) Author's Response: Lol I feel like re naming it nutjob and douche, has a better ring to it than the tortoise and the hare. Please do keep reading, the fun is only just starting.
Thanks for the review!
Summary:   He's a young but jaded keyboard player writing lyrics for his band, Breaking Dawn, and she's a naive and frustrated poet looking to break out of her shell; their words collide on-line. What happens when they meet in high school, unaware of their literary connection?
OOC, canon at heart. Banner by FatApolloLove
Categories: AU-Human Characters: None
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 37 Completed: Yes
Word count: 146168
[Report This] Published: February 22, 2009 Updated: August 26, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 15, 2009
Title: Chapter 13: Night Marish
This is, hands-down, my favorite fic at the moment. Your writing is beautiful - it's fluid and melodic, and swells like the music featured so strongly throughout the story. It's absolutely lovely to read. The story itself is excellent - the characters lovable because of their flaws and their talents.
Generally speaking, it takes a lot to get me to gush over a story, especially fanfiction. You've accomplished it easily.
Looking forward to more! :)
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 20, 2009
Title: Chapter 14: Complicated
Brilliant as ever. Anxious to see how this misunderstanding plays out.
Favourite silly songs? "Barbie Girl" by Aqua, "Rasputin" by Bony M, "Home for a Rest" by Spirit of the West.
Summary:  
Bella is devastated by the loss of her mother and is forced to go live with Charlie, her Mom's best friend, when there is no one else to take her in. She gives up on living, too lost in her own anger to let anyone close to her. Enter Edward, the handsome teenage vampire, and the beginning of a complicated love-hate relationship. Neither can deny the connection between them, but can their love survive the fear that rules her and the secret he hides from her? AU and OOC, Rated NC-17 for language and sexual content.
Categories: Twilight, AU Characters: Alice, Bella, Carlisle, Charlie, Edward, Emmett, Esme, Jacob, Jasper, Jessica, Mike, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 47 Completed: Yes
Word count: 292396
[Report This] Published: February 24, 2009 Updated: December 25, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 24, 2009
Title: Chapter 27: Intuition
Hee! That's totally the reaction I would've had, were I in Bella's position. :) Author's Response: Me too! I think it would be neat to have a boyfriend that could read minds as long as he couldn't read mine! I totally agree with you. Thanks for the comment.
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: May 17, 2009
Title: Chapter 33: Conflicted
Absoloutely fantastic. Beautifully written - the emotional rollercoaster they're both riding is conveyed so well, and so realistically. Serious kudos. :) Author's Response: Thank you so much. I tired to keep it real in terms of the uncertainty of the first time as well as all of the stuff that's going on between them. Beyond the heat, I hope their connection and love came through. Thanks for the comment.
Summary: A bored Bella in biology writes in her "collection of random thoughts, poetry, short stories, etc." A bored Edward stumbles upon it and leaves an anonymous comment. The result? A curious correspondence between Mr. Popular and the Queen of Sarcasm...

* * *
I looked down at my page and froze. Green pen. I never wrote in green pen. But there they were, foreign green words written neatly in the space underneath my messy scawls from yesterday; glaring up at me as if they were daring me to read them. Curiosity overtook my dysfunctional brain as I read the message...
* * *
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Bella, Edward
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 10 Completed: No
Word count: 30484
[Report This] Published: March 09, 2009 Updated: December 13, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: December 14, 2009
Title: Chapter 10: Fun & Games
“You know, The Penis Game! It's where I say penis, and then you say penis, and then I say penis, and then you say penis etc. etc.... But there's a catch! Each time you have to say it louder than the person before you. Whoever says it loudest wins!”
... Okay, fess up. You're actually my senior year boyfriend, aren't you? Good god, I didn't think ANYbody other than that dork and his buddies played The Penis Game. I'm... horrified. And amused.
Summary: Reclusive computer prodigy Edward Cullen needs a personal assistant and single mom Bella Swan needs a job. What happens when their worlds collide? Will Bella learn to trust the shy genius and will he be willing to open up to her as well?
Thank you to Shug for my beautiful banner!!!!!

Categories: AU-Human Characters: Bella, Edward
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 8 Completed: No
Word count: 17994
[Report This] Published: March 16, 2009 Updated: April 08, 2009
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 08, 2009
Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8
I'll do you one better and start singing the entire score of Annie, since Daddy Cullen has taken in Little Orphan Bella... :P
On second thought, that's a really disturbing comparison. Forget I said anything. >.<
Summary: 
Edward, Bella and the gang are adults living in Seattle. Edward and Bella meet due to a klutzy accident in the restaurant where she works. Bella's ovaries love Edward and they voice their opinions quite often. There's an instant attraction between them, but Bella notices there's something that's troubling Edward.
Lovely banner made by famouslyso...because she rocks.
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Bella, Edward
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 40 Completed: Yes
Word count: 240878
[Report This] Published: March 16, 2009 Updated: October 03, 2010
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 01, 2009
Title: Chapter 3: Chapter 3: The Obligatory Bella Barbie Chapter
I think I might just love you. Seriously.
This is one of my new favorite stories, hands down. You manage to blend charm and awkwardness and romance and humour just brilliantly. The talking ovaries kill me every single time. I'm sitting here giggling like a fiend while my husband looks at me like I'm on crack.
Loving it! :D Author's Response: I'm so glad I'm not the only one who has a husband that stares at her like she's on crack. Thank God I'm not alone.
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 06, 2009
Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4 :Dyslexic Heart
I have obscene amounts of love for this story. One of my current favorites, no question. Author's Response: I love obscene amounts of everything. I especially love obsene things. The girls are very pleased that you like their story. (But don't tell them that they're not the main characters...)
Thanks for reading!
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 11, 2009
Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 5: Cat Scratches and Road Rage
I think this story makes me laugh more than anything I've read in a really, really long time. You're absolutely brilliant. The Silence of the Lambs references had me laughing so hard I woke up the dog. :D Author's Response: Thank you! When I can make people laugh in reference to Silence of the Lambs, I've done my job. Glad you're enjoying it!
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 14, 2009
Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6: The Money Shot
I can break my leg in three different places at once and not shed a tear, but piss me off and here come the waterworks.
Story of my freakin' life. Embarrassing as hell, too.
Mike Torture for the win! Author's Response: Mike torture is always win in my book. He's just too easy.
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: April 17, 2009
Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7: Graduation Presents
Call Sex Hair. We NEED him. We want to love him long time.
I choked on my drink when I read that line. God. I should know better by now not to eat or drink anything when I'm reading this story, because it will inevitably come out my nose.
And god... the LOLcat-speak. HAHAHAHA! The cell phone between her legs was priceless, too. Also, the Ghostbusters references. I laughed to hard my husband was afraid I was going to hurt myself.
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: May 05, 2009
Title: Chapter 11: Chapter 11: Magnetic Junk
Ugh. My heart bleeds for Edward and everything he went through. :( I'm sure Bella and the girls will take good care of him, though. Oh yes.
Reviewer: alicedances Signed
Date: June 28, 2009
Title: Chapter 15: Chapter 15: Show Me the Money
She's been infiltrated by the Scientology peen?
Oh my god... I made such a weird laughing noise when I read that line that the hubby thought I was choking! God, I love this story so much. >.<
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