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Penname: muldergirl [Contact]
Real name: Jo Anna
Status: Member
Member Since: May 03, 2009
Website:
Beta-reader:

Love Twilight (obviously!) and enjoy reading everyone's interpretations of the relationships, Especially E/B! Sorry, canon shipper here; can't bear the thought of either one of them with anyone else. But I still read those fanfics; just can't see it. I write myself, but I've yet to submit anything. Guess it takes LOTS of courage, and I surely applaud those wonderful writers here who continue to make the rest of us giddy. This is an awesome site, and I spend at least 23 hours and 59 minutes a day here. Much to my husbands chagrin! :)


Due to a yahoo glitch, I have two accounts here: Muldergirl and Darcyfitz. We are one in the same. LOL. I have to use Darcyfitz on the forum, but Muldergirl in reviews. More of me to enjoy your work, I guess!


I am in awe of all the talented writers here. You guys Rock!


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Reviews by muldergirl
 
Loner by Nilla Rated: NC-17 starstarstarstarstar [Reviews - 9900]
Summary: Feature

Edward Cullen was a loner, an outcast. He clearly hated everybody, including himself. He was not a nice person. So, why was I so drawn to him? And why did I get the crazy feeling he felt the same way?

WARNING: This story will deal with the aftermath of child abuse and rape. If that bothers you too much, I strongly recommend that you don’t read.

 


Banner by steffyxxface



Thanks to steffyxxface for the lovely banner!


Categories: AU-Human Characters: Bella, Edward
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 115 Completed: Yes Word count: 365612
[Report This] Published: November 13, 2009 Updated: July 06, 2011


Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: March 04, 2010 Title: Chapter 25: Chapter 25

Wow, doesn't sound too good...I hope that if it has something to do with James or Edwards mother, that Carlisle will be supportive and Edward won't fall apart. The thought of him lashing out at Bella now out of fear and anger makes me cringe. Hopefully, he will allow her to comfort him if it's something along those lines.

Just wanted to let you know, I enjoy this story so much, and it doesn't bother me how long the chapters are. You update frequently anyway, and I understand your vision for your characters can't be rushed. I guess some readers are just impatient for your story to unfold; after all, can you blame them? It's phenominal! LOL

Thanks for the update...I'll be holding my breath until the next chapter. :)



Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much! :)

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: May 21, 2010 Title: Chapter 42: Chapter 42

Ah, a breakthrough. But...once he realizes nothing was his fault, the dam will break and he will be faced with the fact that monster did those things to an innocent child. Yikes!!

I am DYING for him to allow Esme to hug him. He needs a mother sooo much. Sigh...I'm going to go lie down now with my hankie in a dark room. :(

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: March 14, 2010 Title: Chapter 27: Chapter 27

Awesome, awesome...He's letting her in. Yay..Oh dear Lord...now we're getting somewhere..I'm holding my breath and praying for poor Edward to get through this. Yikes...I feel like these are my friends or something. LOL...Please, please...don't keep us hanging too long. :) But I'll understand if you need to take all the time you need. LOL



Author's Response: I won't keep you waiting too long, I promise. :) Thank you so much for reviewing!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: March 19, 2010 Title: Chapter 28: Chapter 28

Wow, good job. Just enough information for now. Neither one of them are ready for the big 'reveal'. This is enough for now to continue to build Edward's trust in Bella and her ability to soothe him and be understanding. I don't mind when you use lines from the book. Especially when you work it in so well. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, right? One question, though, Nilla...after all of this, why does Edward STILL question Bella wanting to stick around. Perhaps he doesn't dare wish yet that she wants a deeper relationship with him, like a couple, (and we know she does, because she's already admitted it to both his parents) but can't he see by now how much she cares? Even with his baggage, he has to feel her love. Why does he still doubt her draw to him? Sidenote: it must have been heavenly for him to have her run her fingers through his hair. Sigh... Come on, is he blind?? LOL

Thank you for the update, as usual. I can sleep now knowing he didn't turn her away. Have a wonderful weekend.

:)



Author's Response: Well, Edward's starting to trust her more and more, and he definitely feels the connection between them, but you have to remember it's all still very new to him. He's not used to trusting people, and he's confused by his feelings. That, and he's terrified of risk losing her. Hope that answers your question. Thank you so much for your review, and have a great weekend yourself! :)

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: March 23, 2010 Title: Chapter 29: Chapter 29

Fantastic, Nilla. It was wonderful how Edward and Carlisle shared the tentative moments in the kitchen. It is clear he is dying for parental love and support, but doesn't know how to let them in. In what could have been a major fight when Carlisle admitted to talking to Bella, it ended well with alot for Edward to think about. While true that the dream was horrible and frightening, something dawned on me: had the dream not veered off into James' abuse, it might very well have ended with Edward having an erotic dream about Bella??? :) Yes? Or is it just my overactive thoughts? I mean, what was that line about not wearing anthing under her robe??Hmmm?? LOL

I love, love, love your story (as I say every chapter) and the slow build of trust, between Edward and those who love him, makes my heart melt. Yes, I know there is a long way for poor Edward to go, but I can't help but be a romantic and yearn for a first kiss soon. Something. Anything. Even a kiss on the cheek!!! LOL

Have a wonderful day. You've just made mine. :)



Author's Response: *lol* It could've happened, yeah (about the dream). Unfortunately, it ended differently. Thank you so much for your review, and I'm really glad to hear that my update made your day. :)

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: March 28, 2010 Title: Chapter 30: Chapter 30

All I can say is bravo. Thank God Bella didn't accept Eric's date out of spite, based on your teaser. She of course doesn't seem that petty and I'd expect more from her if she did. It's clear she is in love with Edward and doesn't want to 'date' anyone else. And I can't wait for Edward's POV of this; he must have been terrified and elated to find out Bella actually want's to date him. Poor Edward must be so shocked Bella wants him that way. First date night...I remember those. Anxiousness as wella s excitement. I know you'll deliver a sweet chapter full of angst.Can we expect any kissing to occur, or that just wishful thinking??  LOL...Thanks for the update Nilla, fabulous as usual. xoxo



Author's Response: Well, you just have to wait and see. :) I'm so happy you liked the chapter, thank you very much!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: April 02, 2010 Title: Chapter 31: Chapter 31

Oh, crap is right! Poor Edward; he's going to freak out at having to officially meet Charlie, isn't he?

Reading this chapter from EPOV was heartbreaking. One thing that stood out was that he doesn't consider himself attractive. I'm sure when he finds out Bella thinks he is beautiful it will blow his mind! It's so devastating to know victims of abuse consider themselves ugly and tainted. I'm happy at least that Bella is going slow with him, not putting any pressure on. It's clear by now she will do anything to put Edward at ease, even though her heart is overflowing to get closer to him. How frustrating for her; but her tenderness is just what he needs.

I can't tell you Nilla how enjoyable this story is; whenever I see the update I literally sing! Thank you for the slow progression of these characters; I'm sure I speak for all of your fans here when I say how much we feel invested in them and care about them. Now go forth, and create a perfect first date. LOL :)

Just a suggestion. Please??? :D



Author's Response: I'll do my best. ;) And thank you so much for your kind review!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: April 06, 2010 Title: Chapter 32: Chapter 32

Damn..his uncertainty breaks my heart!! I hope Edward doesn't melt into a pile of goo before this date; you can feel how badly he wants to do this but his anxiety is just so strong. Make it better, Nilla. LOL



Author's Response: I will, eventually. :) Thank you so much for reviewing!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: April 16, 2010 Title: Chapter 34: Chapter 34

Yowza, that was heavy!! No, didn't see it coming. But we never do :( It was great, Nilla. And exactly like I thought it would be once the truth was out. Poor Bella, just trying to understand where she fits into Edward's heart. And God, you could just feel Edward's pain. So sad. For a horrible minute, I thought Edward would lash out at Bella, at the line he wanted to break something but there was nothing around.

Hopefully now, Edward will realize Bella is not going anywhere and does not think any less of him. I'm going to go cry into my pillow now. xoxo

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: April 20, 2010 Title: Chapter 35: Chapter 35

Ugh, total heartfail going on here...I'm still in shock and tears are falling. And that last line?? Sigh, so sad. So the cat IS out of the bag now, and poor Edward does wish his mother was dead. That rotten bitch, I wish she was as well! No matter she really doesn't exist; I'm sure there are a few of her really out there in the world, and it's heartbreaking. At least Bella can be there for him now, and he knows it. Oh, Nilla...this was just so great.



Author's Response: Aw, thank you! I can't tell you how happy I am that you liked it!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: May 04, 2010 Title: Chapter 38: Chapter 38

This is the sound of me screaming. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, my God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He did it!!! So seriously worth the wait!!! And sooo sweet. This chapter was a rollercoaster of will he/won't he. But he found the courage and he did. And of course, it's Bella. Not some random girl. His first kiss, with the (who are we kidding here??) love of his life. Yay!! I'm so proud of lonerward. And I'm a bit concerned (in a good way) over his last line...And I never wanted to stop. I think I could deal with that. LOLOLOLOLOLOL...sleep well, Nilla, knowing you made ALOT of people VERY happy tonight. :)

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: May 08, 2010 Title: Chapter 39: Chapter 39

Gah...total heartbreak. Well,it had to happen sooner or later, this meltdown with the parents. Poor Carlisle; he is finally realizing that his passiveness all of these years hasn't helped Edward at all. And he does love him. I hope he can convince him of this. And as for Edward and Bella...yikes...I feel so bad for Bella. She must know he is just confused, and it doesn't mean Edward doesn't love her back, right? At least to the degree he understands. Ah...excuse me while I lie down in a dark room somewhere and cry and moan and generally wail. :(

Have a great week Nilla.

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: May 12, 2010 Title: Chapter 40: Chapter 40

Gah!!!! The EVILEST cliffie of 'em all!!! HeHe...I would die a thosand deaths to hope it is Edward, but something tells me it's not.That would be too obvious, right? So, maybe it's Carlise??Don't know, but I'll keep my hopes up... Not that I want Edward to grovel or anything, because the poor boy is going to collapse with all the angst he has. Nilla, you NEVER fail to disappoint. I was crying so hard my lips were trembling as Carlisle spilled his heart to his son. You could almost feel how badly Edward just wants to be understood, and his devastation over thinking he lost Bella was too much. It's clear now that Carlisle loves Edward very deeply, and regrets not taking a more pro active role in his recovery. I kept waiting for the unthinkable: Edward falling apart in his fathers arms. I guess we're a ways from that, huh?  I'll try to calm down enough to go to sleep, but it WON'T be easy, you little fanfic vixen, you..LOL

Have a great weekend!!! :)

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: May 17, 2010 Title: Chapter 41: Chapter 41

To weepy to give a proper review, so I'll just say thanks. :(

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: May 25, 2010 Title: Chapter 43: Chapter 43

Ah, so beautiful. Well, he didn't bolt again when she said she loves him. It's a start.

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: June 03, 2010 Title: Chapter 45: Chapter 45

Oh, bring on the hankies..I'm so sad right now..  :(

Can I say how heartbreaking it is to witness Edward's meltdown? We all knew this day would come, but to witness it is like watching it really happen. You bring such life and depth to these characters, Nilla, it's amazing! Phew..don't know what to think about Edward's future; he needs ALOT of therapy. Have a wonderful weekend, girl!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: June 08, 2010 Title: Chapter 46: Chapter 46

Oh, boy. It's gonna get dicey. I love Bella. Like really love her. And I usually don't. Don't torture me; I just don't like the character in general. But your Bella is wonderfully fantastic and sweet and kind. And she gets Edward. Thank you for bringing her to life is such a lovely. way.

As for Edward...my poor boy :(

enough said

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: June 24, 2010 Title: Chapter 49: Chapter 49

That was hilarious and such a 'guy' stereotype. I think Bella HAS to know he at least tried. I wouldn't give a hoot if the cookies were burnt; the fact the guy I loved attempted to please me like that would mean everything to me.

I teared up like a baby at Edward's and Esme's interaction. I was like, "hug her already, for goodness sake!!"

Nilla, so sorry you had a bad week. Hopefully the weekend will allow you to chill and rest. Have a great one. Thanks for the chapter. xoxo

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: July 16, 2010 Title: Chapter 53: Chapter 53

I will mark this day on my calender because it is the best day of fanfiction ever. Oh, my God...I'm going to pass out from joy. All I can say is lovely. Everything about it was perfect. The words were right on target and I am just so....

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: July 30, 2010 Title: Chapter 56: Chapter 56

WooHoo!!! Emmett DOES love Edward. I knew it!!! Even though no Edward in this chapter (wipes tears) I was sooo happy to see Emmett's 360 turnaround. Now we're talking...at first Edward will hate the fact Emmett knows. But he can start to heal once he allows his family to love and support him. As long as he's ok now. Ow, Nilla, leaving the chapter there!!!

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: August 03, 2010 Title: Chapter 57: Chapter 57

I feel so bad for all of them; Emmett must be so upset. I am so glad Edward realized, at least a part of him did, that he needed his parents and called them. He seems to realize that he is not alone, and people love him enough to help. There seems to be more angsty times ahead for Edward and co.

:(

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: September 04, 2010 Title: Chapter 63: Chapter 63

Way to go, Edward. Take the high road. So, Rosalie asked Edward to Sadie Hawkins. Makes sense, since in canon they were meant to be together, but it's funny how she did it. "I want you to take me". Ha. Even eogcentric Mike never said it that way to Bella. LOL.

Thanks for the kind words on the thread, Nilla. Glad your writers block is cleared. I think I speak for everyone!!! xoxo

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: September 08, 2010 Title: Chapter 64: Chapter 64

So glad they both are broadening their time with other people. The male bonding was great.

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: December 28, 2010 Title: Chapter 85: Chapter 85

Oh no...Angela told Edward how upset Bella got and now he's panicking she's going to leave him? Or he broke down because of the failed date? Lord, it could be anything....Yikes. I'm kinda terrified now. Nilla, you always keep us guessing girl.

xoxo

muldergirl/darcyfitz

 
Reviewer: muldergirl Signed
Date: January 06, 2011 Title: Chapter 87: Chapter 87

I'm seriously loving you right now Nilla. And Emmett. Like really loving him. I am sooo proud of him for sticking up for his brother. And the fact he said BROTHER to Newton, not just Edward, sticks out like a sore thumb. Especially because a few months prior he said that Edward wasn't really his brother. Oh, I just want to cry. I KNEW this would happen, that the day would come when they would bond. GaH!!!!!!!!!

 




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