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Penname: the shrew [ Contact]
Real name: Heather
Status: Member
Member Since: September 04, 2008
Website:
Beta-reader:
Edward/Bella. Rob/Kristen.
Thank you for reading. :)
[ Report This]
Summary:  
This story is a Midnight Sun-type one-shot, that is, Edward's POV of Twilight. It takes place at between TW14 (Mind over Matter) and TW15 (The Cullens) while Bella sleeps – a peek into Edward’s infatuation, and how he reacts to hearing Bella say 'I love you" for the first time.
Categories: Twilight Characters: Alice, Bella, Carlisle, Edward, Emmett, Esme, Jasper, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: White Night
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes
Word count: 13616
[Report This] Published: May 04, 2008 Updated: May 23, 2008
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 06, 2008
Title: Chapter 1: As Bella Sleeps
A beautiful story. I loved how Edward told his family that he kissed Bella. I hope you write more from Edward's perspective. Thank you for this!
Author's Response: I have a bunch out there from Edward's POV - and more Dark Side of the Moon coming. I'm glad you enjoy it! thanks for the review! blondie
Summary: 
Bella and Edward have faced nearly every obstacle imaginable in their quest to be together, and yet have overcome them all. Now they face what may be their greatest challenge: Marriage. As promises are fulfilled and relationships change, Bella and Edward try and reach the fairy tale ending that true love should bring. One threat still remains and now it hangs over the entire Cullen family. Bella is the key to protecting the family; but can she find enough control in time to save them?
Categories: Post-Eclipse, AU Characters: Alec, Alice, Angela, Aro, Bella, Ben, Billy, Caius, Carlisle, Charlie, Demetri, Edward, Embry, Emily, Emmett, Esme, Felix, Gianna, Jacob, Jane, Jasper, Jessica, Marcus, Mike, Phil, Quil, Renee, Rosalie, Sam, Tyler
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 23 Completed: Yes
Word count: 66837
[Report This] Published: May 08, 2008 Updated: August 31, 2008
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 07, 2008
Title: Chapter 1: Preface
OMG! I just reviewed one of your other stories, but I did not make the connection with other stories you have written. I ADORE your work! Especially First Light. This is such an excellent rendition of how Breaking Dawn could have happened. I really cannot say enough good things about it; it was just so awesome! Totally IC and a compelling story. You are now the first author under my favorites. Keep the excellent fanfic coming! I look forward to reading more! Thank you! :)
Author's Response: I'm so glad you enjoyed it! I knew that I wouldn't be able to predict what SM was going to do in BD (but who could've? Whoa!), but it was fun to see that I was close on a couple of counts! Thanks so much for checking out first light - and my other stuff as well! There's more coming... 8-) (big smile for the lovely review) blondie
Summary: What's the farthest thing from The Cleavers? The Cullens. How will Bella fair being a human, in a house full of vampires, with a past that might come back to bite her? 
Categories: AU Characters: None
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 18 Completed: Yes
Word count: 49288
[Report This] Published: May 25, 2008 Updated: January 02, 2009
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: January 03, 2009
Title: Chapter 18: Chapter 18
Aww. I am so sorry to see this end. Are you thinking of a sequel? I love the Cullen interactions!
Summary: Stranger than Fiction is the FANTASY story of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart's FICTIONAL off screen romance while filming Twilight. I have a slide show of their pictures running in a small window on the upper left hand corner of my computer screen and they whispered this little story to me one day. NO HARM IS INTENDED BY THIS STORY. IT IS A TRIBUTE TO MY TWO FAVORITE ACTORS. 
>
Categories: AU-Human, Other Characters: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 17 Completed: Yes
Word count: 72497
[Report This] Published: June 11, 2008 Updated: April 09, 2009
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: April 09, 2009
Title: Chapter 17: Chapter 17: STF Anniversary Bonus
Fuck me, that was good! Short and sweet, and totally left me wanting more! I love these characters! I sure hope Kristen appreciates her birthday gift! ;P
Summary: It was said of early vampire books and movies that vampirism was simply a poorly disguised substitute for sex. Back in the day, the entire genre was considered extremely risque'. With that in mind, this is a parody of Midnight Sun replacing all the vampirism with sexuality - no blood lust - just extreme human lust. AH/AU and consequently, OOC. Thank you to Debussy_This for the fabulous (and hysterical) banner!!!
Categories: AU-Human Characters: Alice, Bella, Carlisle, Charlie, Edward, Emmett, Esme, Jacob, James, Jasper, Other Character, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 25 Completed: Yes
Word count: 85040
[Report This] Published: July 14, 2008 Updated: April 24, 2009
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: November 18, 2008
Title: Chapter 18: Chapter 18
love this story so much! particularly enjoyed the line:"Then I went home to have imaginary phone sex . . . er . . . fantasize about having imaginary sex on the phone. I mean, think about having imaginary sex for real. Whatever!" pricelessly hysterical. :)
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: December 22, 2008
Title: Chapter 20: Chapter 20
Fuck yeah!!! Go Bella!!! I figured she would have brought a few condoms with her, but the pill is just as good. Damn! I am so glad that she was prepared. That girl knows what she wants. And silly Eddie was going to try to deny her. Ha!
Oh, but having to wait until the new year for the next chapter? Gah! The wait is excrutiating! I am now counting the minutes until January 1st.
Merry Christmas! Thanks for the uber-fantastically-amazingly-wonderfully-stupendously awesome story! I love this! :D
Summary: Just a little pre-Breaking Dawn speculation on what Bella and Edward's wedding night and honeymoon would be like. Mature themes.
Categories: Post-Eclipse Characters: Alice, Bella, Edward, Jasper
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 2 Completed: Yes
Word count: 6094
[Report This] Published: August 06, 2008 Updated: August 21, 2008
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: November 25, 2009
Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2: The Honeymoon
I really enjoyed your reinvention of the honeymoon. It was fun. It was sexy. It was sweet, in that beautiful Edward/Bella way.
Again, it's a little odd, I suppose, what really struck me reading this, but here is what got me in this chapter, "I reached down to find his cock straining against my hip through his boxers. I stroked it through the thin material and he leaned his head into my shoulder and grunted. He snapped his face back to mine and demanded, “Tell me what you want!”"
That moment was just very real for me.
There is an innocence to their discovery of their sexual selves, and I greatly enjoyed reading this exploration of that aspect of their relationship.
Thank you for sharing. :)
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: November 25, 2009
Title: Chapter 1: Edward's Room
What I really loved about this chapter was the dialogue. The way that you articulated their hesitancy through pauses and such, it felt very IC to me. I also thought it was very sensual when he was unbuttoning her wedding dress. It was a lovely image.
Don't ask me why, but the line that I heard most clearly in my head while reading was, "Promise me, Bella. I need to know you know.” That line just really hit home with me.
On to read the next chapter . . .
Summary: A story about Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson during and after the filming of Twilight. What happens behind the scenes on one of the most romantic movies of the year? Do the lines between fiction and real life get blurred?
Categories: Other Characters: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 13 Completed: No
Word count: 31260
[Report This] Published: August 09, 2008 Updated: November 03, 2008
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 22, 2008
Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7
You're cruel! What a tease! Well, mission accomplished...I await with baited breath for the next chapter. Can I just say "Woo-whoo for NC-17!" My favorite! Totally my kind of heroin.:) Loved the texting between Rob and Kristen. Big Boy is a funny nickname, but will you include any reference to the Spunk Ransom nickname? Don't really care as long as I get to read more of this story. Thank God for fanfiction that fills the two month void before the movie release! Anyways, I digress, love the chapter; please update soon, and thanks also for answering my earlier question. I went back to read that over again, and it made much more sense. I love to learn phrases from different places, so that was doubly cool. :D
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 18, 2008
Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6
How tantalizing was that?! I want more! What a great idea to include scenes that will not end up in the movie. I am glad that you have Catherine being so thorough. The Nikki and Kristen interaction is really cute too. I loved Nikki's line, "Sorry baby girl. I got nothing." I have one question though, and sorry if it seems silly, but what is the meaning of "two pump chump"? Thanks for the update! :) Author's Response: It's not silly! Sorry, I always forget that not everyone uses my weird expressions. Plus, I'm Australian... could be that. Aaanyway a two pump chump is a guy who 'finishes' after only two pumps. Essentially... prematurely ejaculates - just a funnier expression! Hope that clears that up.
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 28, 2008
Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8
About your author's notes from the beginning of this chapter... I know what you mean. I feel a little guilty reading stuff like this, but it is such a wicked temptation. I wouldn't feel too bad if I were you; it is not intended to be disrespectful, but simply good fun. For me personally, I just like the idea that the love of Edward and Bella could spill over into the real world. If anything this should be a compliment to the actors because they are so convincing as the characters. They just make it seem so real. It's their own fault for being so good at what they do. LOL ;) Having written all that on just your note, I also really liked the chapter. The 3rd scene was a nice surprise and a perfect choice. I liked the description you had for the white bed sequence. Very sensual. I love how sweet you made the first part of the chapter, but then Rob turned into such an ass at the end. So we got some fluff and some angst. Oh the seesaw of love! I wonder what comes next for these two? Please update again soon. This is quickly becoming one of my favorite secret pleasures. Thanks! :)
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: October 11, 2008
Title: Chapter 9: Chapter 9
Oh PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! keep this story going! It's way too good not to finish it! I almost hit my head on the table when I got to the end of the chapter. That is one helluva cliffhanger! Jeezy chreezy, if they do not spontaneously combust from all the UST then I will! I adore that you have them becoming friends. That is so darling! (I mean that in the uncheesiest way possible.) You made me feel bad for Mike, but I still want to see Rob and Kristen together. Hey maybe Mike and Jess will hit it off as they both leave? *wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say no more* That would be perfect! Please feel free to use that idea should you find it handy...please find it handy so our two favorite stars can feel less guilty about their budding romance! Okay, I'll stop now, but I just want you to realize how invested some of us readers are in seeing this story through. I love it, and thank you ever so much for sharing! And please update soon, if you can. Thanks again. :D
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: October 27, 2008
Title: Chapter 11: Chapter 11
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!! WTF?! I both love you and hate you right now. This chapter was such a cruel tease! Bloody hell girl! The angst virtually has me in tears. That's how good you are, and how pathetic I am, because I am LOVING this story, and I am going to spontaneously combust soon from all of this UST! Gah! It's soooo gooooood! But you are killing me here pining for these two characters. I have to admit that I have officially gone to the Dark Side. I am now completely, utterly, and hopelessly an Rpattz/Kstew shipper. They are just too entirely amazing not to be together. I swear, if I have to wait a week until your next update I am getting out my voodoo doll and putting it in a blender! *note to self -- purchase a voodoo doll for torturing torturous authors* Mwahaha! I think my favorite line is this: "The very thought of being able to mark her as his and only his flitting through his mind before he could stop it. Most of all, he realised with a pang to the heart, he just wanted her to be his. No description. No title. Just his." I just about melted when I read that. So good! *whimper*
Okay, enough gushing, update chica! Like now please! :D
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: October 28, 2008
Title: Chapter 12: Chapter 12
LMFAO! That was Absolutely Fabulous! (as was the show) Thank you for the quick update. I had a really crap day, so this has gone a long way to making it all better, so thanks for that! Lizzy is fantastic! She has a bit of Alice to her, which I just adore. She has my favorite lines: “Oh my God! It’s the Kristen Stewart. My brother just about blew his load when he found out he’d be working with you! It’s so great to meet you!” and "For weeks after his audition every time I called him it was all ‘Kristen this...’ ‘Kristen that...’, I swear the boy was already planning your wedding. He’s probably already picked out his veil and everything.” The veil bit especially got me chortling. I'll bet Lizzy wants Rob and Kristen together. At least that's what I'm hoping. ;) She should be a great ally for them. Loved the texting conversation. I was really hoping he would come "save" her like a Port Angeles sorta thing, but the set up for later is cool too. :) Forgot to mention this from the last chapter, but I was ecsatic with the idea of Rob slowly undressing only to put Kristen in his shirt. Freakin' awesome that was! I still think Kristen should have fought just a bit harder to keep the shirt, but that's just because I wanted them to playfully chase each other around and "innocently" touch each other more. *shaking head at her own depravity* At least now it smells like both of them, and I quiver at the intimacy of their scents mingling! Yes, you read that right, and yes, you are that good! You are my Rpattz/Kstew goddess for this story because you make me feel so much for them. Well done with all the angst. This is a bit sweeter, and I hope that soon we get some fluffy goodness and, dare I say it, lemons for this fantastic duo? *shocked gasps fill the air* Thanks for making the wait for the film a bit more tolerable. More please? Otherwise the cauldron comes out, and I start casting spells! ;D
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: November 03, 2008
Title: Chapter 13: Chapter 13
I am calling you so many bad names right now! :) *whimpers* why must you end it there? OhMyGod! That is fucking cruel! And here I was so ecstatic when I saw that you updated, but then to leave a cliffie like that... it's just brutal! Now I have to wait another week for more? That's it, the voodoo doll is going into the boiling cauldron just like the bunny from Fatal Attraction. Oh yeah, I just went there! Thank the Lord that Rob finally said he loved her, granted it was during his orgasm, but still. I simply adored Kristen's possessive reaction to Ashley's patting of Rob's shoulder, and then she claimed "Mine!" when they kissed. LOVED IT!! *dramatic sigh* update soon please! This story is a drug, and I am addicted.
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: November 25, 2008
Title: Chapter 13: Chapter 13
Oh goddess of the Rpattz/Kstew fanfic please update this story soon! I need to know what happens next. You made me so desperate that I had to go and write something myself! For the sake of fandom you cannot let that happen again. I mean really! A desperate shrew is not a pretty thing. :) Okay, all joking aside...just want you to know that I still love this story and hope you can post a new chapter soon. Thanks! :)
Summary:
A running smutline of Edward and Bella's honeymoon . . . and everything afterwards.
Categories: Breaking Dawn Characters: Bella, Edward
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 20 Completed: Yes
Word count: 100790
[Report This] Published: August 10, 2008 Updated: March 21, 2011
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: October 30, 2008
Title: Chapter 8: Curious
Bring it on! I can't wait for Vampire Bella, and I bet Edward can't wait either. He's destroyed enough furniture already. :)
Summary: Vampire brothers Edward, Emmett, and Jasper are stuck at age 17 forever. Unfortunately, though all of them have lived for over 100 years, they have very little experience with dating girls, especially modern ones. What happens when their vampire powers and inexperience collide? Will the results prevent them from winning the hearts of the girls they love?
If you like humor, angst, and edge of your seat, nail-biting cliff hangers, you'll like this story.
Categories: AU Characters: Alice, Bella, Carlisle, Charlie, Edward, Emmett, Esme, Jasper, Rosalie
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 47 Completed: Yes
Word count: 108776
[Report This] Published: September 04, 2008 Updated: January 09, 2009
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 21, 2008
Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8: Rookie Mistakes
Eeek! Nice cliffhanger! (crosses fingers and chants "please no jacob!" repeatedly) sorry, I still have a vampiric aversion to the guy, and would like this AU to remain purely vamp-driven. These poor guys have enough to deal with already. Looking forward to your next update. I hope that we don't have to wait five days for more of these lovely Cullen boys. ;) Author's Response: Will Jacob make an appearance? You'll just have to keep reading and see. Although I felt Jacob was a necessary character to provide angst in the books, I still couldn't stand him. Cockiness is a huge turn-off for me. But then, why do I like Emmett so much--probably because he's such a teddy bear and goff ball that it offsets his sometimes over-confident attitude. It's not like that with Jacob. He was so condescending towards Bella--trying to tell her how to run her life--it drove me nuts. While I have not decided if he will be involved with the story at this point, I can say if he is involved, he won't get much of a part. Hope that satisfies you. Thanks for the review! Glad you like it.
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 21, 2008
Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7: Notes
Those letters are so sweet! Esme is definitely raising those boys right. Once again, Emmett is fabulous in cautioning his brothers against changing their entire schedules. Kudos for showing the intelligent side of that sweet teddy bear! :) Author's Response: I took quite a bit of time revising the letters. I wanted them to be sweet but boyish. And I love writing for Emmett--my hubby and him are so much alike in that their both goofy teddy bears. Thanks for the review.
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 21, 2008
Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6: Adonis the Perverted
Oh Emmett! He is just stealing the scene for me. "Was she naked?" LOL The perfect Emmett question. Bella's POV after her first meeting with Edward was also cool. I love that she is so instantly enamored with him. The happy dance comment was a nice touch. Reading on...
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 21, 2008
Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 5: Mud Wrestling
Awwww! How adorable! Yea Carlisle for taking actions to keep Edward there, and Esme's tricks were great. I loved the fight between Edward and Emmett. It's nice to see our vampires getting to do vampire things, namely beating each other senseless without getting hurt, and then to have it turn into playtime...just awesome. I loved the comments about family sticking together to help each other. Too true, especially the Cullens. Also, thanks for answering my earlier questions. I totally understand the dynamic now, and I really appreciate your response. :) Reading on...
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 30, 2008
Title: Chapter 12: Chapter 12: The Choice
What do you mean will he change her or not?! That boy better change her or else! Or else what? I don't know, but I'll think of something. Short and sweet angsty goodness. My favorite line is Bella's -- I just called Edward my ‘beloved', I snorted inwardly. And you included the happy dance again (or at least the thought of it). Yea!!! Beloved Edward + inward snorting + happy dance= 1 happy shrew! Thanks for the update...not so patiently awaiting more! :) Author's Response: I may or may not probably answer that question in the next chapter. Nice threat--or else what? Teehee! Glad you like the snorting. I just think Bella is a closet snorter. She just seems like the type. Thanks for the review.
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 18, 2008
Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Shotgun
Emmett mooning Edward is very funny, but Edward's response really made me laugh. Maybe you do this in later chapters, but can you explain a little bit about why the boys would act so immature after being vampires so long? I know this is AU fanfic, but I still would like a better handle on that. Reading on... :)
Author's Response: I think that what I am trying to show is more the brotherly bonds. They act immature around each other, but you will see in later chapters that they can step up and be mature. My husband and his older brother goof around all the time when they are together (they always have--and my hubby is 38 and his brother is 41). It isn't immature as much as just how they interact as brothers. The portrayal of Emmett is based on some interactions I've witnessed between my husband and his brother--not that they've ever mooned each other, that I know of at least. The fact that none of them has ever had a girlfriend or even tried to attract a girl makes for a lot of awkwardness. Emmett has been doing his homework in regards to attracting girls, but Edward has been too prude and Jasper has been too shy. When the three of them finally encounter girls that they like, only Emmett does well (at least at first--his time is coming). The other two have difficulty because of their predatory nature--they have a hard time turning off the vampire. Mixed with their inexperience, it makes for some rather embarassing situations. The relationships will not automatically happen. Everything will take time. The girls are not so easy to get. Thanks for bringing up valid questions. I hope the answer was satisfactory for you. Thank you for taking time to review.
Reviewer: the shrew Signed
Date: September 18, 2008
Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2: Ride
Emmett is adorably funny. So is Rose, but she has a boyfriend? Poor Emmett! Whatever will he do now? ;) My favorite line in this, well, the one that made me laugh loudest (I think) was Jasper's response to Edward saying please -- "Edward, that only works on girls." So funny I am still chuckling over it. :) Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I'm not only inspired by family, but by the teens that I teach. I can see that line coming out of their mouths. Just wait. I have several chapters up that are waiting for my Beta. Rose's boyfriend issue is addressed soon.
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