Edward is dared to do something stupid by his older cousin, Emmett.  Jasper and Emmett stand back and watch.

"Yeah, but do you think we should've told him that she's the police chief's daughter?"

One dare, one purse and two unsuspecting vicitms lead to a series of pranks and events that will change their lives.

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What if Bella had occasionally called Edward on his controlling behavior? Say, when he tailed her home from La Push? What might have happened if she actually stood up for herself? Bella/Edward the way it should have been.

Banner compliments of CrimsonIceGoddess - YOU ROCK my dear!

It is amazing how quickly life can resume normalcy after a traumatic event.  It's not that the inhabitants of the scenario don't know they are rebounding, but the force of the universe pulls them back into its patterns without their consent.  Everything will not be the same, but the normal routine is enhanced, flavored by the bittersweet taste of change or loss in any form.

Bella told me she had once envisioned our lives as the complex pattern of a rug, the colors and textures intermingling, each individual but, when placed together, producing a beautiful creation.  If challenged, I would have most likely used a musical analogy.  I would have compared our lives to experiencing a musical performance by one of the masters. 

Beethoven...Bach...or if you wanted a little strife, Wagner.  Most at one time or another had performed their masterpieces within European chapels.  I could envision the rise and fall of the notes, as they would weave their spell.  The light in the building as it filtered through stained glass, creating a dizzying array of colors. The smell from beeswax candles permeating the room.  Modern musical halls lacked this perfect simplicity.  Yes...this would have been my analogy.

Little was I to know that Fate had much in store for me.  Before she was through with me, I would barely resemble the boy I'd been...

What happens to the Cullens after the Volturi left. Edward and Bella begin life together and face both heartbreak after their lives are irrevocably changed by losses of family and friends, and immeasurable joy as the events of their lives unfold. 

Bella's family is attacked by vampires when she is young, leaving her the sole survivor. Rescued by Dr Carlisle Cullen, she is adopted into his 'vegetarian' family, consisting of him, his wife Esme and their three sons Emmett, Edward and Jasper. Struggling with her trauma, Bella finds herself developing special bonds with each of the Cullen boys.

This story has no Alice or Rosalie (or at least, not as vampires or Cullens).

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Cheers to the lovely ms_ambrosia and CatMasters for the gifs.

~A Crackfic for Trust in Advertising by the amazing, wonderful and all powerful, vjgm.~

Amazing banner by Anne Cullen - thank you so much Anne!

After the first disastrous camping trip Bella and the Cullens are ready to put it behind them and move toward the upcoming wedding, until Charlie's 'thank you' present sends the household back into a panic - and back to the woods. Uh oh.

Edward, Jacob, Demetri, and Felix are members of the Volturi Elite Guard. Their team tracks beings that have either violated the Volturi Code Of Silence or have knowledge of the existence of mythical beings. When the team is assigned to investigate the human Isabella Swan, Edward's unalterable world is altered.