Twilight and the Cullens in Rhyme, Part Two
(With profound apologies to Theodore Geisel a.k.a. Dr. Seuss)
Those Twilight vamps,
Those Twilight vamps
Make me afraid to turn off lamps.
Doc Carlisle Cullen’s three hundred plus years old.
After him they simply broke the mold.
He’s never once drunk human blood.
He’d not even swallow in a flood.
He did create a son and friend
When Edward nearly met his end.
Edward’s father died first of Spanish Flu,
And then it took his mother, too.
Before she died, she begged Doc C,
“Please save him, Sir. Save him for me.”
Carlisle could not deny her wish.
He snuck the boy out with a swish.
He’d never bit a human before.
With his instincts he was at war.
Should I bite his neck or throat?
If I fail, Aro will gloat.
But then again, the vow I made.
Oh, my nerves are greatly frayed.
Three days have passed.
He’s just like me.
Can I teach him?
We shall see.
Young Edward hears what’s in my mind.
I hope he’ll trust what he will find.
There’s so much for the boy to learn.
It’s silence for which he seems to yearn.
It’s been a year, and now he’s free
To step out and to walk with me.
Not in the sun, for we will sparkle.
My concern for him is patriarchal.
We still must hide just what we are.
We’re just a little bit bizarre.
Humans sense we’re just a little off.
Still at themselves, they’ll slightly scoff.
We drink from animals like deer.
Humans really have naught to fear.
Yet better that they keep away,
Our instincts so to keep at bay.
My nights on duty are so long.
For me to wish for love is wrong.
Sweet Esme’s face I can’t forget,
Whose broken leg I once did set.
How can this be? Her scent I smell.
My heart tells me this bodes not well.
Her broken body lies here dying.
I shed no tears, but I am crying.
This must not be. Her life can’t end.
My venom can still help her mend.
But will she love me as I love her?
Three days I wait till she does stir.
Edward says she does remember me.
From her vile husband she had to flee.
Her unborn babe she tried to save.
My sweet Esme, you are so brave.
Her blood lust is quite hard to tame.
Each time she slips, she feels such shame.
At last her thirst she can control.
And soon she feels almost whole.
Her baby son she’ll always mourn,
But Edward with mother’s love she’ll adorn.
Esme agrees to be my bride,
For all eternity side by side.
Miss Rosalie Hale was dubbed the town’s great beauty.
She knew it, and it made her snooty.
Her fiancé, Royce King the Second,
Out drunk with friends saw her and beckoned.
They left her bleeding on the ground.
Carlisle smelled blood, and Rose he found.
He changed her, hoping she’d be Edward’s mate.
In shrieking tones she set him straight.
Edward too, demurred posthaste.
Her shallowness made him feel distaste.
Still, he did treat her like a sister.
Once in a while he even missed her.
Rose emphatically did not like this life.
Her anger often caused great strife.
She went out hunting on her own
And came upon a man face down and prone.
The bear prepared to attack once more.
“No! He’s mine!” Rose loudly swore.
She carried him home a hundred miles,
Hoping for a chance to see his smiles.
She’d fallen for the mountain man right away
and begged Carlisle to change him for her that day.
Emmett took to this new life quite well.
On his mistakes, he did not dwell.
Pixie Alice woke up all alone.
But visions of family she was shown.
Another vision was of her mate.
She waited and waited, but he was late.
One rainy day, she sat again in the diner.
So pert and petite, she never looked finer.
A tall, red-eyed stranger came in out of the rain.
He’d been drawn here some peace to attain.
She saw him and walked, placed her hand on his chest.
He looked in her eyes, and he knew he was blessed.
“You’ve kept me waiting a long time.”
“Sorry, Ma’am.” The joy in his heart was sublime.
Together they tried to master the Cullens’ vegetarian diet.
Alice did it. Jasper struggled, but for Alice he kept quiet.
They followed the Cullens, first here, then there.
“We’re here to join your family,” Alice did happily declare.
Jasper held back. He was wary at first.
His gut always told him ‘Prepare for the worst.'
Slowly, the Cullens’ gentle ways brought him around.
Each day, he learned something new to astound.
Poor Edward. He had siblings now. Four!
Their exuberant thoughts were quite hard to ignore.
The five of them went again and again to high school and college.
Each matriculation added more to their knowledge.
One day, Alice said, “It’s time to go back.”
We learned from experience to give her no flack.
We had lived nearby in Hoquiam once before.
The sun rarely shone, but the rain sure did pour.
The new student at school is the police chief’s daughter.
Her blood sings to Edward. It could be a slaughter.
Her mind’s silent to him, much to his dismay.
He tries running, but he simply can’t stay away.
Bella’s smart and tenacious as hell.
She pushes and questions till Jacob does tell
of legends of Cold Ones and shapeshifters, too.
She’s accident prone and a magnet for danger.
Her lack of fear strikes Edward stranger and stranger.
He saves her again down in that dark alley.
And she adds yet another clue to her tally.
He admits he can read thoughts in all minds but hers.
“Something must be wrong with me,” she avers.
His cold touch and the speed that he moves
Are the last clues she needs . It adds up and proves…
“I know what you are,” she tells him at last.
“Why do you not run away, aghast?
You should be afraid.”
“Not of you; my choice is already made.”
“And so the lion fell in love with the lamb.”
It’s a miracle she does not fear what I am.
She loves me and does not run away.
That means more to me than I can ever say.
Esme is thrilled. Carlisle is most pleased.
Emmett’s ecstatic, Rose won’t be appeased.
Jasper does not want to slip, so he’s wary.
His thirst can sometimes be downright scary.
Alice is so happy Bella’s her new best friend.
She knew what her vision did portend.
Still, my sister cannot see all things.
A simple game of baseball danger brings.
The nomads think Bella is there as a snack.
We outnumber them so they do not attack.
But James is a tracker. He’s still a threat.
He’ll never give up, but he won’t try just yet.
We split up to try to mislead,
James isn’t fooled. We did not succeed.
He follows Bella and tricks her to meet him.
How could she think she could possibly beat him?
We reach her just barely in time
but can’t get her away from that slime.
His venom is burning her arm.
Why, why could I not keep her from harm?
Emmett and Jasper hold James. Alice rips off his head.
He burns in the fire. We know now, he’s dead.
Can I suck out the venom in time?
Oh… her blood tastes sublime.
A gash on her thigh, her leg in a cast,
a bump on her head. Still, she’s safe at last.
She’s a vision in blue as she stands on my feet.
We dance under stars and my soul feels complete.