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Reviewer: modern_audrey (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2011 08:50 PM · On: Chapter 5
Okay, honest opinion time...there is one thing that kind of stands out to me. It just seems so trite and unrealistic that Bella has been in a state of catatonic depression for months upon months, but just coincidentally she decides to snap out of it and wake up within 24 hours of Carlisle's arrival. Then all of a sudden she is back to her old plucky self, still weak but managing to cut up with Carlisle and Esme just fine. I think you could pull it off a lot better if you worked in some kind of subconcious comfort taken from Carlisle's presence...maybe some feeling of no longer being alone or something. Otherwise, as it stands now, the fact that she just happens to come to life immediately after his arrival is entirely too distractingly coincidental, and it kind of works against the plot. :(
Reviewer: ColdFire (Signed) · Date: March 13, 2011 05:14 PM · On: Chapter 39
it was great although you really shouldn't make threats just to get reviews even if it is just threatening to wait longer to post the next chapter or even changing the story plot. though that is a pretty good way to get them. ^_~
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 08, 2011 04:56 AM · On: Chapter 39
It seems Edward is off the hook with Bella. That is good, but I don't understand why she simply dropped the subject, what she was thinking. Ah, I would like so much to see a BPOV of their discussion about changing Angela...
Wedding on it's way, Angela awakening... And that is it. Lucky you Careful What You Wish For! is already up and running. Otherwise, I have a nice collection of pebbles. Some of them are rare, with some amazing hues. I would be glad to show them to you. Very closely! *evil grin*
Jokes aside, your job here was amazing, Eyes! Even the darker spots were by no mean absurd, or too much. I only hope, for example, that Bella's slip was one of a kind. That she gains confidence enough to be confortable-ish around humans again.
Just one doubt, Eyes. Do you remember that Emmet and Rose did go to Florida to check on Renee and Phil? What did they find out?
Now, I will check Careful. Sequels are always appreciated and encouraged, remember that! You closed your story with a cliffie. How evil is that? I'm itching to see what happens next! :)
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 07:27 PM · On: Chapter 38
Well, I wasn't expecting this reaction from Bella, but I guess I should. Her questions make sense. And now the doubt about how she feels about Edward's 'disregard' for Angela's soul. Not that I ever bought his speech, but, anyway...
I wonder if, deep down, he really believes that. The books suggested a maybe...
And Angela? I like how she turned her thoughts to her loved ones, and prayed. Something good must come out of such thoughts. :)
What stinged me more is that, in all likelihood, she will lose Ben. All thanks to Mike and Victoria. Specially Mike. :(
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 05:59 PM · On: Chapter 37
Bella is great! I imagined that, if Mike attacked Jacob, she would help him. Too bad he was a newborn too. If it wasn't for Edward lending a hand...
"He told me not to screw up again or he would hunt me down and tear me limb from limb and bury each of the pieces." Well, at least he said bury, not burn. :)
Well, it went better than I thought. Bella even preserved her friendship with Jacob. Hmm, if they nurture that time enough, maybe it will even help if the Pack one day discovers their little deceit. :-]
I noticed that Angela was not mentioned. Will they hide her fate?
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 05:19 PM · On: Chapter 36
You must be kidding me!! You leave that cliff last chapter, and you left everyone hanging for another one?? I'm lucky I don't have to wait. P-)
Angela is being cared for with the usual diligence. What will be the effects of the bad impression made by Mike and Victoria? I hope she allows the family to show her the other side of the coin.
They will dupe the Quileutes into thinking Bella was changed by Victoria & cia? Probably Angela too? Hmm, it would allow them to remain in Forks, since the treaty would not have been broken. It is a dirty solution; I don't like it. But it's still preferable than to see their standing with the tribe degenerate just because they don't respect a conscious choice, or a death vs. immortality dillema. :-/
However, I don't want to even think what will happen if they find out somehow. :-{
Just hoping Bella doesn't say the wrong thing, and that they are right about Jacob.
Eyes, you made a terrific job, in all the last 36 chapters! :)
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 11:47 AM · On: Chapter 35
'"Edward, am I hearing you correctly? It would almost seem that you believed this existence is a way of life and not eternal damnation." I fought to keep a small smile in check.' HEHEHEE... Ops! Edward slipped! X-}
Bella is so sweet! Only she would try to save Mike from himself after all that. Personally, I think she is wasting her time. But it is part of what makes her special, all the same.
YIKES!!! And here I thought the Wolves wouldn't have a role anymore! But Jacob wouldn't hurt Bella, even now.
Would he?!?? 8-{
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 11:20 AM · On: Chapter 34
'Only then would I be able to let go of James - my debt would be paid in full. Michael and I would be free to travel, hunt and fuck wherever and whenever we wanted.' I wonder if he would accept this alternative, was she successful, or if he would try to rip her head off anyway.
'I waited for her reaction, her eyes fixated on the pulsing vein in Angela's neck, beckoning her to take a taste.' Bella is finally showing the restraint she is capable of. I hope that, at this point, Angela is already aware not all vampires are the same. :)
There is a saying that says 'Do not raise snakes, or you will be bitten'. Victoria should have paid heed to it.
That kick! Mike, you son of a... B-()
Bella is being devious. I hope she have the chance to alleviate Mike from the weight over his shoulders. X-)
And now Angela will discover that not all vampires have to be monsters. The hard way. :(
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 10:33 AM · On: Chapter 33
'He was sired by Victoria, and I know I do not need to remind you how heartless and cruel she can be. He has been taught her ways and may not be willing to give them up.' As much as I wish I could believe Mike can be saved, he showed so much cruelty since his transformation! And let's not forget the Angela plan was of his design. He doesn't even seems to be the same person. No, I think his fate is the pyre! :-|
Member of the whipped society... *giggle*
'I would never see my family again and it broke my heart that they most likely would never even know what really happened to me.' This girl is really worth saving. I don't need to elaborate, do I?
"I can handle a little thirst, Victoria - we stick to the plan. You know where I will be." I have to concede; for an newborn from the dark side, Mike have a remarkable self-control.
'My immediate relief at seeing them, even though I was far from being free, turned to dread as I watched the Cullens move into the sunlight; the same spectacle of color I had witnessed earlier with Mike sparkling off of their skin. How could it be?'
'My eyes jumped from face to face as I recognized Emmett and Rosalie and then Alice and Jasper. Alice looked towards me, offering a sad smile and I almost believed that she meant it.'
Now Angela have a better idea of the mess she was thrown into. A pity she obviously thinks she is toast whoever put it's hands on her. :(
I wonder where is Bella right now. But, from your question, I guess I know. :-]
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 09:45 AM · On: Chapter 32
'I recalled a time when I would have sought any other solution than taking a life, but even I could recognize the madness of this woman and knew that if even if we were able to capture her, there would be no changing her ways to accept the path we had chosen. Victoria truly was a monster and would continue to wreak havoc until she was stopped.'
Wow!! Even Carlisle wants Victoria's head on a platter! You don't see it everyday. :-]
'Bella, I tend to agree with Jasper. Any chance of Angela still being alive is slim.' Which proves that hope is always the last one standing...
That glimmer of hope, by the way, with the farmer was cruel. This girl is very strong if she didn't break to this point.
Are you sure Mike was not possessed by James' ghost? Geez, he is so vicious! And it's not like he doesn't remember his human life, to be so uncaring... :(
I can't imagine what else they have in stock for Angela. I'm not complaining, of course! But, by logic alone, and taking into account his new character, Mike should have complied with Angela's request for a quick death. Well, death, at least. :-/
Maybe they just don't wanna dispose of a potentialy useful bargain chip until everything is really over. I guess.
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 08:37 AM · On: Chapter 31
Bella beating Emmet is always a kick, no matter what version of the story you are reading! X-)
It sucks! I think this sums perfectly Angela's situation. And the poor thing have no idea this is all about her friend Bella...
Finally, they will make their move! Dangerous, but may give the Cullens the window they need to rescue Angela. Maybe Mike's imminent betrayal will even work to their benefit. :(
Anyway, as said by Jasper, they have something Victoria, Mike and all their newborns don't have: their bond, their unified strenght! Go Cullens!!
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 06:05 AM · On: Chapter 30
'"As much as I hate it, love, I know they're right," he whispered as he kissed me lightly on the forehead. With this simple admission, I felt another missing piece clink into place. I was beginning to feel as though he had finally accepted me as his equal and that in itself was a huge step in fixing an extensive part of what had been wrong with our relationship when I was still human.' Yep, a big change! This is very promising! :)
"Edward. I don't want your guilt. I don't want your regrets. I just want your word. Promise me, here and now, that you will never leave me again. Promise me that you will accept me as your equal and not make decisions for me. If you can promise me these two things, then that's all I need to know."
I think this seals the deal. If it won't settle their issues once and for all, I swear I don't know what will. :-D
Jeez! Good thing Alice loves to renew their wardrobes constantly. The way they waste perfectly fine clothes around here... X-}
Another wonderful sweet lemon to balance the sour evil ones! Aahh, a loving moment before the coming battle. They deserve it!
And it will be a hard battle. They won't have the support of the Pack this time, will they? This is really ominous, assuming they will clash with Victoria's army directly.
Hmm... Weren't these two supposed to be hunting, by the way? :-P
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 08:07 PM · On: Chapter 29
Bella and Edward are birds of a feather. 'Once again, the people I loved were being thrown in harm's way because of me.' 'The only way I could come up with was to give myself over to Victoria' *sigh*
Well, decision made! Cullens to the rescue! I suppose maybe they can track her, or Mike, if they get his scent in the local of the kidnapping. Maybe Alice's visions...
But I fear they will have to wait Mike/Victoria's next move. :(
Meanwhile, Angela is indeed a smart girl. At least enough to not ignore what is in her face, contrary to what most people do when it comes to legends. Not that it will give her any practical advantage, at least right now. X-(
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 05:30 PM · On: Chapter 28
And so it happens that after the calm comes the storm. An unfortunate, but true, inversion of an old saying. :(
Hmm, I bet Mike is the shield that can block Alice's visions. It would explain why didn't she 'see' him yet.
And her vision... Could it be about Angela? I can't see what else it could be. I don't think Mike and Victoria will do anything else until they lure Bella with her. :-/
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 04:47 PM · On: Chapter 27
Sweet!! Good lemon! So much better than evil lemon! Up to now, the monopoly was with Mike and Victoria. Eww! :-P
But I sure hope their issues receive the proper closure. I would hate to see things between them fester, like Bella fears. :-]
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 04:17 PM · On: Chapter 26
As Rosalie said, enough is enough is enough! :)
I agree these two still have issues to solve, but this chapter says, clearly, "When all is said and done, everything will be fine!"
Unless, of course, you are a cruel, heartless, despicable person playing a cruel joke on them and on us. ;-P
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 02:50 PM · On: Chapter 25
"Ed, bro, ya gotta relax. She loves you. You have to be an idiot not to see it. But she's hurt. You really hurt her when you left, plus everything with her dad's death. Cut her some slack!"
Now Emmet summed the situation masterfully. I'm astonished, however, that Edward actually agreed with him! :-]
' Once we get home, you two are gonna have to talk to each other and for fuck sake, Edward - don't just talk, but listen, too.' Many people may not give anything for Emmet, but he can be a surprisingly good advisor. He said everything I wanted to hammer into that thick skull! :)
And, now, Mike! It was Angela, after all, his bait. My favourite human, no less! He became so monstruous! I wonder if, in case he was guided by the Cullens after his conversion, he would stay a better person, or if all this perversity would come naturally from within him. :-/
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 02:07 PM · On: Chapter 24
'Edward. The one person I had hoped would be here waiting for me was nowhere to be found.' Good thing Alice clarified this misconception. I love this girl! :)
"I can't help it if I'm drawn to the younger ones, Vic...they're so...spicy." Mike became so disgusting...Is he hunting children? X-(
I'm almost sorry for Victoria for her disappointment when she and Mike clash about their plans for Bella. But what can one do? She have it coming.
Lemme guess. Mike's bait is...Mike? "Bella, I need your help! She will kill me!" Could very well work... :-[
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 06, 2011 10:40 AM · On: Chapter 23
' I know what you are made of and I know that you made a mistake that you will not let happen again. Please, darlin', trust me on this.' Now Jasper said it all. Bella will not allow it to happen again, now that she knows how it works!
I hope.
'If only I had stayed in Alaska with the Denalis, she would have eventually moved on and never had to face all this pain.' This wasn't the choice he made wrong. :-/
Sincerely, I hope that, at some point in the story, you will give Edward a shock that will make him rethink his ways. This take-the-blame-for-everything-in-the-world is tiresome! :(
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 05, 2011 06:26 PM · On: Chapter 22
'I stared for a moment, drinking in her undeniable beauty, anxiously wanting to take her in my arms and never let her go.' You know, for someone so prone to self-loathing, he chooses right this moment to be optimistic? He is always out of sync! P-)
'A long silver braid tinted with ebony trailed down the back of the buckskin fur coat that covered the remains of the man I had just murdered.' ACK!! Things just did go from bad to worse!! 8-O
But it makes sense, I guess. It could have happened in BD, if Edward wasn't there to divert her focus from the hunt. :(
'Why, Jasper? Why didn't he trust me enough to let me make my own choices?' That is the question worth one million dollars.
Jasper, by the way, did a good job in talking to her.
*sigh* Maybe you should have named this story A Darker Kind of Moon... :-[
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 05, 2011 05:34 PM · On: Chapter 21
'If I hadn't left, Bella would still be alive.' *sigh* Here we go again...
I think if Charlie hadn't died, she could very well be already in his arms. As it is, he's screwed! Can't say, unfortunately, he doesn't deserve it. He was so stupid... :-/
However, just after receiving Charlie's death notice, she was worried with Edward, that Victoria could go after him...
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 05, 2011 05:06 PM · On: Chapter 20
"Where. Is. He?!" Uh-oh!!
Otter hunt! Hehehee...They will never let Emmet forget this episode, will they? X-)
'I may have been a confused little girl that he could toss away like a used toy before, but not anymore. He owes me answers. He owes me a soul.' Oh, boy, this will hurt! :-{
I hope she doesn't say the soul part out loud, or it will fuel his ridiculous notions.
I guess Edwards exile is at an end... Better hide all lighters of the house. Just for safety.
And you can hold all these pesky otters! ;-)
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 05, 2011 03:03 PM · On: Chapter 19
Hmm...Evil lemon! Well, no one expects Victoria to be chaste, right?
Two things: Victoria doesn't seems to be lucky in love (no surprise here); and Mike is taking a lot after his "mother". Disgusting! :-P
'What if she blamed me for what Carlisle had done to her?' Idiot.
'Perhaps this was Carlisle's way of making me pay for the pain I had caused not only Bella, but my family as well.' Stupid.
If he knew how far his fantasies are from being realized...I wonder if Jasper and Alice will inform him of the new complication with Bella's memory. Even if they hide it from him, he will know something is amiss.
Damn! His problem, and I'm the one anxious! :-]
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 04, 2011 11:33 AM · On: Chapter 18
' I was unsure whether I was more frustrated or relieved that Bella's mind was still silent to me in death.' Argh! Always this we-are-dead thing. This unnerves me! :-P
Still wondering why Rose's change of heart. Is this the same Rose that, wasn't this a divergent story, would have callously informed Edward of Bella's "suicide", more or less at the time we are now? :-/
Edward missed the bits that made Carlisle worry, it seems. Good. He would suffer more than he already is. And I don't wanna fuel my vengeful side. Much, at least. ;-]
'There was an emptiness inside that I couldn't pinpoint.' CRAP!!! Crap, crap, crap! She really forgot him! How is it possible? He shined in her memories during the change! What did go wrong??? :-()
Reviewer: Costa (Signed) · Date: February 04, 2011 10:57 AM · On: Chapter 17
Man! That was close! I mean, I was sure the Wolves knew what happened to Bella, or were at least suspicious.
When they finally find out... 8-{
"No worries. After what he has put us through the past few months, I think she's letting him off easy!" HEHE! Edward is in everyone's crosshairs. He deserves! X-)
Well, from what I see, I can say Bella is still Bella, vampire extraordinaire. Wonderful!! :)
Except for this thing with Edward... She can't have forgotten him, not with him being the brightest memory during her conversion! :(
Geez, I need a BPOV urgently!
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