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Reviewer: Willow12345678910 (Signed) · Date: July 09, 2013 03:19 PM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

Love it! Good god you're writing's great! I read the story with Pen, which I also received and adored. I am most definitely going to read your other story.

~Love, Willow

Reviewer: Esquire (Signed) · Date: June 08, 2010 10:52 AM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

What a FABU one-shot!!  Very wise is our ghost friend. Jasper should know by now - if it seems to good to be true, IT IS!!!   Loev the Szasz quote - so true!

Mazeltov on your many contest wins....you are, apparently, WIN! :)

Reviewer: Essay33 (Signed) · Date: January 03, 2010 10:38 AM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

Oh wow, that was SO GOOD! A real roller coaster ride for the reader. I've always felt that far more than Edward, Jasper is the "odd man out" in the family, the one whose struggles are the most profound and ongoing though mostly hidden.

This was brilliantly insightful:

"Part of learning to love comes from being shown love, yes . . . but only part. You also have to know what it is to be hurt, so that you can feel compassion for others."

Wonderful work. I'm looking forward to reading more of your superb writing.



Author's Response:

Oh, I agree that Jasper's definitely the furthest on the outside. He has Alice, and Edward had no mate until Bella, but there's no way Jasper would ever be as close to the parents as Edward. And he had a much more turbulent past to work through.

I'm a very sensitive type that is hurt very easily, and I tend to attract insensitive people. But I do feel that people who have never been hurt, or only superficially, can't possibly have the same level of empathy as those who are hurt but get through it. I'm so happy you found that part rang true for you. :o) Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: Winterstale (Signed) · Date: December 12, 2009 06:49 AM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

This was a great interpretation and Jas is the perfect character for Redlaw. Your writing in this is very simple and clean which allowed the characters to take center stage. I'm not sure if this contest has concluded but if it's still active I wish you a lot of luck!

-w



Author's Response:

Thanks for reviewing! Jasper would have been a dream for Dickens. He's any every angsty, conflicted character you want. :o) If I'd really been trying to emulate Dickens, it could never have been written simply; that man got paid by the line, and apparently he got paid a lot! Luckily there was a word limit or this could have gone on forever (the original was around 35,000 words). The contest is over, but it was excellent inspiration for a Christmas story! It actually pushed me to write two; the other will be up sometime this month. Thanks again!

Reviewer: Master of the Boot (Signed) · Date: December 03, 2009 09:46 AM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

This is easily the best Christmas story I've ever read.  I consider myself to be a horror writer, I write about horrible people that do horrible things and pay the price.  But this was wonderful,  like the story 's theme, it's about love and hate both. 

I love the idea that suffering as much as love makes us who we are, because it does.  I can testify to that; I couldn't be the man I am today without first taking my medecine. 

But there was some very moving and powerful imagery in this story.  The most powerful for me was Carlisle and Esme fighting, because they're my two favorite characters. But the moment with Rose and Emmett was almost as brutal.  It was just such a savage scene, so opposite of what I expect of them, even though they're my least favorite characters. 

Still, almost the most savage scene was where Jasper kicked Renesmee, who is so well loved by all. 

I also loved that part about fire and how Maria used to torture him so.  That was just perfect.

Ta

MAster of the Boot



Author's Response:

I'm thrilled that you liked it so much! It's so hard to say what makes people kind, because plenty of abused kids end up being violent themselves, while others rise above it and reverse the trend. I like to think kids who are treated well, like the way Carlisle and Esme treat them in my other story, will be nice because they don't know any other way, and yet how can you avoid hurting someone if you haven't been hurt? But there's no way to find out what would be different if a given incident were erased, so you just have to take them all as a package.

I had originally written a scene where everyone apologizes to each other, but I think it's doubtful they'd be allowed to remember what had transpired. Poor little Renesmee. The guy in the original story was mean to the orphan child, so I had to put it in there, but still. There's a young actress I picture as Nessie, and it makes me sick to think of anyone kicking her.

Probably the reason Emmett and Rose's argument seemed worse was that it's easy to believe they could be that vicious, even without this reason. Rose certainly could, anyway. And it's sadder because it's not so far OOC.

Thanks so much for leaving such a detailed review!

Reviewer: Strider (Signed) · Date: December 02, 2009 11:11 PM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

Wow.  Just...wow.  That was exquisite.  And wise.  I can see Jasper falling into Christmas melancholy like that, too--good characterization.  I also like how he tries to protect her from the ghost.  Now I want to go read the Dickens...  Great job on this story--thank you for it!



Author's Response:

Thanks! Originally I wanted Carlisle as the main character, but he could never be as angsty as Jasper. The Dickens will take a couple hours out of your life, but he's pretty soothing. There are some minor subplots I couldn't recreate here, as well. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Reviewer: amydee (Signed) · Date: December 02, 2009 10:34 PM · On: The Hope of Empty Men

This was really different and good!



Author's Response:

Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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