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Reviewer: Kendra (Signed) · Date: January 01, 2012 09:23 AM · On: Bridge to Nowhere
I simply love this story. It is heartbreaking and poetic, filled with great imagery, and inspires an empathy with Bella that I haven't felt before. I'm only on chp. 9 and so far it is a Twilight re-write (with some minor changes) but it is done in such a way that it challenges me to see the story with new eyes. I'm really liking the view. Well done so far, and I trust that you wont take our Edward too far out of character.
Thank you for your work.
Author's Response: Ah, happy new year and happy reading! I had worried so much that simply rewriting Twilight would bore everyone but me. Thank you so much for proving me wrong. :-)
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: September 09, 2011 01:53 PM · On: Consequences
Please write more!
Author's Response: I have ... am. Thank you so much. <3
Reviewer: pbswimmer (Signed) · Date: March 08, 2011 07:21 PM · On: Consequences
I love how Bella thinks it's Edward's great-grandfather writing in the journal.
Man, I'm getting that call right now from Auntie Flo and I want to hang up.
I got so engrossed in reading the Jasper part that I took my laptop into the bathroom with me, I'm embarrassed to admit! ;-o Great writing!
<< Her feet are like a pair of doves, nestled against each other there in mid air. I want to hold them in my hands. Even if they are the coldest part of her body, Bella's feet would still feel warm to my hands. >>
Love. Thanks for the deliciously long chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I was actually worried that this chapter was too long, too many parts - but I just couldn't find a right place to break it up.
I have to say, you've picked out all my favorite parts of this one. So glad that you enjoyed them too. Thank you so much for reading and sharing your thoughts!
Reviewer: Hayesmom (Signed) · Date: February 14, 2011 08:27 AM · On: Consequences
:)!
Author's Response: :-) ! Same back atcha. Thank you for reading!
Reviewer: amydee (Signed) · Date: February 13, 2011 10:56 PM · On: Consequences
Wow, didn't expect Jasper to run off but it makes sense. I hope they find him when he is ready to come home.
Beautifully written chapter, as always. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Author's Response: Yes, I was totally shocked by Jasper, too. Shows how much these characters have a mind of their own sometimes. But like you say, it makes sense, so who am I to argue with him?
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!
Reviewer: romancaholic (Signed) · Date: February 13, 2011 05:50 PM · On: Consequences
Bella hasn't realized that Edward from 1917 is the Edward in her class. In her mind she's picturing current Edward to the words she is reading. We all know they are one and the same. Edward left the journal in her room subconsciously, but maybe on purpose for her to learn about him. Now in 6 days hasn't been able to find it or retrieve it. Family quarrel about what to do with Bellal especially since Edward saved her from the van. Family is split with the majority on the side to leave her alive. Jasper being the only true warrior among them must have thought her death would be the easiest solution since Alice saw her vision. A vision which has Alice in disagreement with Jasper. Jasper is hurt Alice would choose a human over him. After she told him about the vision and her feelings towards Bella, Jasper would never do anything to Bella to hurt his Alice. His exposed possible shame has him reeling in guilt and painful emotions.. So much he has to leave to set him mind straight. Alice is upset about his leaving and missing him. Esme gave Edward great advice you have to live through the darkness (worst circumstances) to get to the light (spring -- his heart's desire.) Edward can't be apart from Bella under the excuse of retrieving his journal watching her reading it on her bed. While he hides in the tree branches and leaves taking inventory of the skin exposed to his sight. Taking them to memory and making assumptions on what she would feel like in his hands. Gotta realize soon Edward your feelings towards her run deeper than your bloodlust for her blood, but actual lusting for the girl. 17 year old hormones are coming to the surface for Edward towards the only girl to have ever grabbed his attention.
Author's Response: So sorry for the lateness of this review reply! No review notices are getting to my inbox for some reason. Ah but what a review this is. I love this:
While he hides in the tree branches and leaves taking inventory of the skin exposed to his sight. Taking them to memory and making assumptions on what she would feel like in his hands.
So sensuous .... :">
And I love your description of Jasper as the only true warrior.
There is more to come on all of these. Thank you so much for following every chapter like this!
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 05:58 PM · On: Morning
oh my gosh! That song fits Bella so well! It's perfect for this story.
Author's Response: Oooh, thank you! I had so much fun with it, too. Thank you for reading and commenting!
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: February 07, 2011 03:59 PM · On: The Owl Called Her Name
wait a second, so the owl called Bella's name? Uh oh...It's foreshadowing the almost car accident, isn't it? LOL I'm getting excited! I freaking love your story!!!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review. I never received notice of it in my inbox :-( but luckily I cruised by the story and have found it here. So glad you are enjoying the story. Hopefully I will keep more on top of replies after this!
Reviewer: MistyH (Signed) · Date: February 05, 2011 12:23 PM · On: The Ghost in the Wishing Well
It so beautiful, and so sad. I don't even know how I expect this to turn out - with Bella old and lifeless in a casket, or forever young with Edward, or with Edward dogging her footsteps until she does die. Everything seems possible, and it all makes my heart twist, just a little. I feel like your prose is more poetry than anything else, evocative and alluring in its simplicity.
I look forward to additional chapters, and to reaching Ithaka with yours.
Author's Response: Wow. I am tongue-tied (finger-tied?) by such a lovely review. The next chapter is almost finished (FINALLY!!!) Not really writer's block, just a hard time assembling all the pieces of the puzzle and finding the words to express what I meant. Happens some time.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. If you like, have fun on the image gallery thread, too.
http://www.twilighted.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=8074
There are some teasers there for future chapters ...
@};-
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: February 05, 2011 12:13 PM · On: Una Rama Oscura
The imagery is beautiful but you know, I really want Edward and Bella to start being sweet to each other :(
Author's Response: Read on, my dear, read on. <3
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: February 04, 2011 08:09 AM · On: Harry Clearwater's Famous Fish Fry
You're really awesome! You have such a knowledge of nature and Native people and their culture and that brings something extra special to this story, making it even more amazing! :D
Author's Response: Wow, thank you very much! And I am so happy that you are enjoying the story. Thank you especially for sharing your thoughts. Cheers!
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: February 02, 2011 09:39 PM · On: Tell it to the Rain
oh the poem is gorgeous! I was lost in it :)
Author's Response: Oh my, thank you. You see, you let me go back to earlier chapters and enjoy them all over again.
Best wishes.
Reviewer: transitory_moment (Signed) · Date: February 02, 2011 09:03 PM · On: Prologue
wow. This was really incredible! I like how you made Bella's voice sound unique but still hers and the nature description wasn't tedious but beautiful too. Keep it up!
Author's Response: Oh my, thank you so much. I am always so touched when a new reader discovers the story.
I will be eager to read any comments you may offer as you read on. I so remember when I was your age.
JSYK, although it has been a while since my last update, I am NOT on hiatus. Just a touch of writer's block. In fact I work on this story at least a little bit almost every day. Yes, writing can be work sometimes.
There is an image gallery for this story on a forum thread I set up, and some of the later entries on that thread include teasers for future chapters. Enjoy.
http://www.twilighted.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=8074&start=0
Reviewer: tarasana (Signed) · Date: January 09, 2011 02:35 PM · On: The Ghost in the Wishing Well
just read this again (please write more soon!!!) and realized again that for so many reasons (all pertaining to your greatness) this is the best fanfic i have ever read.
Author's Response: Oh my lord, thank you! I am working on the next chapter right now. Teaser is on the forum thread ... ;-)
http://www.twilighted.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=8074&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=70
It's about halfway down the page. Enjoy. <3
Reviewer: romancaholic (Signed) · Date: November 29, 2010 09:55 PM · On: The Ghost in the Wishing Well
Debate and Alice's visions at home regarding Bella have majority of the Cullens upset. Esme wants to move to avoid hurting Bella. Alice adores her already and wants her to be her friend. Carlisle has no intention of hurting her. He just wants Edward to retrieve his journal. Jasper had a passing thought of killing her making it look like a bear attack. Horrid idea. Alice very upset with that vision. Rose and her nasty comments/thoughts about Edward's decision to save Bella from the van. Maybe should have let the van hit her is her opinion. But the blood from that crash would have caused all the vampires thirsty for the blood. Edward climbed in her window. He can't find the journal. Even checked under her pillow trying to locate it. Bella moved and the blanket lower revealing his journal tightly wrapped up by her arms close to her chest. The journal is close to her heart. Bella has a death grip on it. Edward doesn't want to wake her so he's going to wait it out. I guess hide while she has her human moments in the morning. Edward already decided to protect her from anyone thinking of harming her.
Author's Response: "Bella has a death grip on it." Omg that is the BEST line! I'm going to frame it!
As always, your summary sparkles. And you've laid out the balance of intention in the family: Carlisle, Esme, Alice and Edward all definitely want to protect Bella. I wonder if that makes her safe, now that a majority of the Cullens are on her side ...? Only time will tell.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. <3
Reviewer: pbswimmer (Signed) · Date: November 28, 2010 02:01 PM · On: The Ghost in the Wishing Well
A very suspenseful (and beautiful, as always) chapter. I loved hearing Edward's thoughts--you portray him as the intelligent, passionate, confused individual he is--and reading Alice's visions of the future was quite cool as well.
"All of us wondered again if she had done such things as a human. And what may have been done to her as a result."
I had the same reaction. That would be freaky to hear Alice suddenly "speaking in tongues".
"Bella seeing me. In my mind's eye she is not afraid, but yawns and rubs her eyes, as she stumbles over and crawls sleepily into my arms. I welcome her so gladly. Somehow we manage it, the two of us, curled together here on the chair."
I love that image. And the fact that she held his journal to her heart was so touching. Great job, meow!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for all your wonderful and loyal reviewing. <3
"Intelligent, passionate, confused" - Edward in three words. Fantastic. And yes, I do indeed have quite a soft spot in my heart for Alice. I spend quite a bit of time trying to imagine what her inner world is like, dealing with visions that come with or without calling.
I always wonder whether the little vignettes in my chapters - like Bella sleeping with Edward's journal in her arms - are too sappy. So glad it came out as touching instead.
Cheers,
m
Reviewer: Wilynn (Signed) · Date: November 27, 2010 10:27 PM · On: Ithaka
I just do not have the words to say what I want to say. The best I can do is to thank you for giving us something profound and different. Your writing makes me think and appreciate beyond anything I have read since I was in college.
Author's Response: Wow, thank you for such a kind response! I feel bad about the long hiatus between posts - life has been a little crazy, and I have had a bit of writer's block. Thank you for sticking with it, and I'm so glad that you enjoy. Have a lovely holiday season.
mkch
Reviewer: verysubtlegift (Signed) · Date: October 07, 2010 06:59 AM · On: Ithaka
Well - zig and zag indeed. I was sort of unprepared for all that, but I think it works well. I like the way that you are able to use their powers as a compliment to the story, it really made an impact here, but you never overwhelm the reader by having their powers always at the forefront.
Poor Bella. It feels a little unfair for her. She really has done nothing at all, save for existing. She sees only her little portion of the story, and yet she has this big heart for others around her - and Edward, who pretty much has the whole story from every angle has just given her the very short end of the stick. Don't know that I am too happy about that. I will say this though, it is very rare that I find a story where I am willing to defend Bella, and somehow I always want to protect this one.
I now brace myself for the fallout.
Author's Response: ikr! it totally blind-sided me. but i just couldn't put it back once it came out this way. sort of like what Edward is dealing with, now that he has (impulsively) spilled the beans on Bella.
as always i just love your protectiveness toward Bella. Edward really feels the same way, he's just ... clumsy. like you say, i am bracing myself for the fallout, too.
thanks so much for everything you have done for this story, all the handholding and the wonderful wonderful beta-ing you do. none of this would be here without you!
-m
Reviewer: pbswimmer (Signed) · Date: October 02, 2010 05:28 PM · On: Ithaka
<< Somebody's been sleeping in my bed, and she's still in it! >>
Hee hee, this made me laugh. Apparently vampires aren't the only ones with a keen sense of smell.
I haven't read any of the stories you mentioned but I enjoyed the inspiration they provided here!
It's very sweet that Edward's mother left him a poem in his journal. I'm intrigued by how him leaving his journal in Bella's room will stir the pot. It seems he can't help himself from revealing himself to her.
Author's Response: ~~~ Apparently vampires aren't the only ones with a keen sense of smell. ~~~
Or else vampires just really smell ... talk about pot calling the kettle black!
And now to find out what kind of stirrings are in their future ... gah!
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. Autumn is coming. Stay warm!
Reviewer: romancaholic (Signed) · Date: October 02, 2010 12:58 PM · On: Ithaka
Carlisle's statements means that they must be united together against any foe, or in this case the outside real world. Stay together as a unit/opinions/family because if you don't it's better to be apart/divided/not family. Rosalie wants to kill Bella because she knows Edward saved her from the van. Edward doesn't want to kill her. His feelings for her are deeping each and every day. Physically he desires her more. His scent is all throughout Bella's room and she does notice it. Mostly within in bed quilt and pillow. She is loving it. Buring herself in his scent remembering his holding her in the hospital. But she has discovered Edward's journal. Which on some subconscious level Edward left the journal for Bella to see and learn the truth about him. Actually she was thinking it was a journal from one of his ancestors that he found before becoming part of the CPS. When she reads it, it might reflect other things. It will be insightful of how he was when he was a young man in 1917/1918 before his transformation. Edward telling his family he left his journal at Bella's in his mind he has sealed her doom. It will go either way, the family as a unit will elect to kill her, leave, or accept Edward's love for Bella and embrace her into their family unit. We'll just have to wait and see.
Author's Response: Ah, united against the real world -- it seemed like a good idea at the time, but now I start to wonder ... !
You are so right that Edward's subconscious desire to be known to Bella has now created havoc for them both. We will just have to wait and see.
Thank you so much for your lovely review and summary. Delicious as always!
Reviewer: pbswimmer (Signed) · Date: September 28, 2010 08:30 PM · On: Prologue
How's the next update coming along, my dear? Bummer that you had to work another shift. Hope to see you soon!
Author's Response: oh thank you so much. this chapter has been worked over and massaged umpty-ump times. until the cows come home. but i think it is ready for prime time at last. just waiting on final feedback from pre-readers. then into the queue with it! thanks so much for your sweet and friendly inquiry. <3<3<3
Reviewer: pommegranite (Signed) · Date: September 04, 2010 10:44 PM · On: Grendel
You, know, I think, that I've been with you, and with this story, since the very beginning, and I'll follow wherever you lead.
But this is the chapter that made me cry.
"We blink our phosphor code, and pulse forward to seek and feed. The slick ribbons blink white and gone, white and gone, suspended in the black, but taste only of poison and things long dead. There is no nourishment here, no quickening, even if one with roe lay near."
'white and gone' is well, well. Only someone who watches, I think, could pair those two words so well.
"'Tis bootless. I tried."
That's when the tears came. I think. I can't remember.
When I was ten, my Aunt and Uncle gave me a copy of Rachel Carson's The Sense of Wonder. I used to think: one day, I'd like to watch the way she watches. I think you watch that way. i admire your skill and your bravery, and thank you for being so generous with us.
Author's Response: Oh my goodness! I love Rachel Carson's writing.
I entreat you to hoard your tears a little bit. There is so much more to come ...
In the mean time, a small teaser for the next chapter is up on the image gallery thread ...
http://www.twilighted.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=8074&p=1100135#p1100135
Reviewer: jad27 (Signed) · Date: August 31, 2010 12:11 PM · On: Grendel
finally caught up and wanted to tell you that I think this is a beautiful story. so vivid and lyrical. keep it up! :)
Author's Response: Oh thank you so very much. And welcome to the story!
Reviewer: pbswimmer (Signed) · Date: August 29, 2010 05:45 AM · On: Grendel
Hey meow!
So this chapter is really out there! ;) Carol's summary helped me understand it a little better. I thought it was cool how the chapter was from the perspective of the sea creatures.
<< This creature is blind. Mass and magnetism, temperature and current, the bioelectric spark, are undecipherable to him >>
How creatures of this earth might perceive a vampire?
<< Bubbles of air rise from the holes in his face, and he draws in water in their stead. There is no feeding here. He is as hard as the stones he set free. Harder, for they yielded to him. Now he is as heavy, too, and sinks slowly, as the air motes shudder upward. >>
That was a very lyrical description. I like how you take risks with this story. You definitely go to the beat of your own drum! :)
Author's Response: Heh, I'm just too white and nerdy. My first passion, both reading and writing, was science fiction. Guess it shows. :p
Thanks so much for 'flying' with me, even under the sea!
purrrr.
Reviewer: romancaholic (Signed) · Date: August 28, 2010 06:53 AM · On: Grendel
Edward is frustrated with his life and the feelings he has for Bella. Beating up the rocks along the cliffs of the sea. Beating for his wants, needs, and desires for the girl whose blood/scent drive his wild. His family was worried about him. They want him to return to them. Each send their thoughts to him to come to them. His body is full of water and his weight has sent him to the bottom. Jasper sensed him by his torn emotions. The family create a vampire chain to reach him at the bottom. Together they pull him back to the surface to rejoin with them. Edward needs to make a solid decision. If he wants Bella in his life then he needs to approach her, befriend her, woo her, and love her until she is his. Otherwise he needs to totally avoid her all together. Leave and go somewhere far away to stop his tortured mind. Bella has been hurt by his shortness, but she is touched and confused by his concern and kindness towards her now.
Author's Response: You've saved the day with this lovely distillation of the chapter. Poor Edward, he is so overwhelmed by feelings that he interprets as depraved, that he hasn't really been able to realize what a treasure Bella could be in his life. What he is feeling actually is all about her soul, but it just smells like blood to him. Thank you SO much for reading and especially for your review!
@};- @};- @};-
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