sweet story!! u should contiune!!

I LOVE this story so far, my only criticism is that Edward seems to begrudge Esme and Carlisle interacting and being friendly he with Bella.  This seems very out of character for him and I don't understand it. He loves sharing her with his family with her in the books and seems so at ease and close with them.  It's part of what I love about him.  That he's mostly above the sullen snotty teenage stuff.  Maybe I'm missing something... perhaps it's some kind of forshadowing that I'm too dense to pick up on?

Oh wow this story was simply breath taking. Everyone was believably in character while at the same time given much richer depth than in the novels. I especially enjoyed reading a story where Esme was given a chance to be more than a stereotypical two dimensional character.

Author's Response:

Thank you. I tried to delve into the thoughts of especially Carlisle and Edward, I'm glad you liked it. My Esme is influenced by EliseShaw's Esme in her fic No Longer Alone. She's the one who really did the grunt work to bring Esme to life, I just riffed off of her work (I told her I did!). I highly recommend that story if you want to read a really great Esme.

Thank you for reading, and for your review. It is much appreciated.

This is one of the most intellegent, well written pieces on this site.  Keep up the great work!

Author's Response:

Thank you!

I think you really nailed it.

Edward understands that the "monster" is still inside him, but he's not realizing that he's still trying to play God, as well, by trying to make Bella's decisions for her. He's also trying to make decisions for Carlisle, asking him to issue a command to the family, even to the point that Alice could be banished or destroyed. Wow.

And the two of them wrestling promises from one another -- you've conveyed the emotion and relationship between them so vividly. Like you were saying in one of your replies, how Edward wants to be a master too, but falls short... Carlisle makes a promise he can keep, but Edward lies, instead. ("Beware the Dark Side, young Skywalker"... Sorry, um, wrong fandom.)

Beautiful writing! I'm looking forward to the next chapter and reading your other wok! :)

Author's Response:

Thank you! Writing this chapter was both enjoyable and difficult. I was trying to figure out what Carlisle would know at this point (Edward's plan to committ suicide when Bella dies) and his drastic switch from not wanting to discuss changing Bella at the beginning of NM to his apparent willingness to do it immediately at the end. And Alice is someone willing to make the future she wants happen, no?

And Edward Skywalker, yes. "Be careful my young apprentice."  :D

In an earlier review, I think I mentioned how I was starting to see the Edward who would leave Bella for her own good. Now I'm starting to see the Carlisle who lets Edward break up their family with minimal protest.

Thanks to an idea I had, I've been thinking about C in the last couple of days, considering whether I actually think he's an effective leader of the family. He does have strong lead-by-example cred, but I've been trying to think of times when he really exercises his authority. The family meetings are the only canon examples I can think of, although there are probably more.

Anyway, the point I'm getting to is, I really disagreed with C just rolling along with E on the point of leaving B in NM, and I appreciate your take on why C would be okay with it.

Author's Response:

Yes, I was trying to gauge what Carlisle thinks about Edward loving a human and what that means for him. There's the deleted scene in the Twilight movie where Carlisle says "but how can it end well?" and that seemed to fit very well with what I was gleaning from the books and Midnight Sun. Edward's "third way" may be the moral choice, but it is a really tenuous choice for Edward's well-being. Vampires can't change very easily, but Carlisle is seeing that Bella has already changed Edward. Since Bella's human she can change, but Edward is quickly crossing the point where there is no return. Edward's pretty stuck, and Bella holds all the cards. I think this would make Carlisle very anxious. As much as Carlisle might like Bella, at this point I don't think he really knows her, he just knows that Bella is able to hurt Edward very badly.

Should Carlisle have put his foot down in NM and told Edward he couldn't leave Bella? Maybe. But at this point I think Carlisle is trying to let Edward step up and make his own decisions, and at the end of the day Carlisle's going to do what he thinks is best for Edward.

You're writing Esme with such spirit, I love it! Especially: "Oh don’t be such a prude,” Esme said, tugging my elbow. “It’s romantic.” ... "It sure is. Because these days it would be more believable for you to pass Edward off as your lover instead of your nephew, you know." *giggles*

I liked the unexpected twist of this night mirroring another night before Edward left for his rebellious years...

And I love your cheeky end notes. Yep, even your end notes are good.

Author's Response:

Esme is such an awful tease! But I think she is also Carlisle's balance, she's happy and optimistic...and opinionated.

And I had to put some dramatic twist in there, otherwise it would be all fluff and giggles. :D  But really, I needed to get them talking. And getting Edward to talk, just talk, is sometimes rather difficult.

I had to go back and check my endnotes again to see what you meant. Yes, it is cheeky. But that's usually how I am. I should make my avatar be just a cheek. Or maybe two cheeks (oh wait). I really do mean the one's on the face. But I think I wrote that endnote when I was still high from pouring over Google Maps of Seattle. I had to rewrite how I got them from the hotel to the concert hall at the last minute because how I wrote it at first was incredibly stupid

I enjoyed the beginning. I'm pretty certain I read the first chapter before. Maybe I had a favoriting-failure. It's happened before...

Regardless, I liked the conversation between Charlie and Carlisle. There's always a sense between these two of inadequacy on Charlie's part, at least to me, and I think you captured that here very well. I know Charlie genuinely cares for Bella and does the best he can, but of course he could never compare to Carlisle as a father figure. Kind of sad in a way...

*clicks Next*

Author's Response:

Thanks for the review!

Yes, well, Carlisle has had decades more practice being a dad than Charlie (who has had just about no practice at all). So it was interesting to write Carlisle's view on Charlie. I tried to get the balance between Charlie-The-Unsure and Charlie-The-Concerned right, I'm glad to know that you liked how I did it.

 

Holy cow!  This is beyond excellent writing!  I hope you are able to post more soon.  I loved the light moments as they mixed with the heavier ones.  Bringing in The Little Mermaid was sheer brilliance.  You are a gifted writer.  Thank you so much for sharing the gift with all of us. 

Author's Response:

You're welcome! The Little Mermaid was a bear to work with at first, but I'm glad you liked how it all turned out. Thank you for reading!

I LOVE how you can link their lives, choices, and feelings to the art around them.  Another wonderful chapter!!

Author's Response:

Thanks! When I looked at a map of Seattle I saw the Sculpture park and thought that Esme just had to go there. And then the art told it's own story.

Your story was absolutely amazing...I enjoyed every minute of it. I felt as if I was getting a lesson in culture. You were able to draw so many cultural facts into this story and continue to make it flow. The way you captured Edward's inner turmoil is so outstanding. Keep writing...you have wonderful talent....thanks for sharing your fanfic!

Author's Response:

Thank you! And thank you for reading. Edward is in a rough place at this point, poor boy.

As per usual, it was great!  I loved how you built upon the established relationships and wrote what really could have been canon.  I'm sorry to see this story go, but it was a wonderful read.

Thanks for sharing!

Author's Response:

You're welcome!

I loved writing the four of them. I might write more of their adventures in the future. Thank you for reading and for your reviews, both are loved.

I'm sad to see this story end. I realy enjoyed Edward's interactions and relatinships with Carlisle/Esme/Bella.

Author's Response:

I'm sad to have it end too, but I think I played out this particular theme. I might write some more family interaction during another time/place. Thank you for reading this story, and for your reviews, both are loved.