Hm... Those last reviews look a strange. -Things always messes up, when I write the review on my WordPad, and copies it in here. Hope it's readable. :)

Author's Response:

Very readable, and much better than losing a review right before you submit it! :)

Hey girl. Time for some more 'Mimiteh'. *rubbing hands against each other*

<"What exactly am I doing? Well, at present I am sitting here staring at the piano that was ruined when my girlfriend's paper-cut almost resulted in her murder. Later on, I'll go suffer through listening to Jacob Black's lewd, salacious thoughts about Bella. Then tonight I might swing by her house and listen to her scream all night long. I've got quite an agenda lined up.">

 

 

 

Dripping sarcasm... Poor Edward.　

<

 

"Hear me out, son. Bella is drawn to danger, yet she never gets seriously hurt. She somehow blocks external forces from causing her damage....>

Hmm...interesting theory. I liked how you brought in her shield here.

<

 

"It's her soul, Edward. It's hers to do with as she pleases.">

You ever watched 'Lord of the Rings', Jen? This is almost a direct quote from that movie. 'Arwen' (an elf) gives her soul -and thereby loses her immortality- to 'Aragorn' (the human). It fits beautifully here!

I really liked Carlisle's little speach about Edward taking away Bellas free will. Think he's doing a pretty good job trying to convince Edward to change his mind. Too bad Edward is so stubborn!

<

 

Don't let me die before my daughter finds some happiness. A man, perhaps another child, to bring some desperately needed joy to her life? Please.>

Good to hear, that Hehewuti actually do care about her daughter!

I think Nina handled Edwards confrontation very well. I would have freaked out, when seeing him approach her on the street, after that last dreadfull therapy session. And I'm thrilled that she managed to convince him to come see him for some proper therapy. Can't wait for this! :)

Still with you, hun. Love it!

Author's Response:

Hey vamps! Thanks for getting caught up.

I thought that wise Carlisle would observe what has gone on with Bella and know that something might be up, though he obviously is unaware of her shield at this point.

Wow, I've never seen LOTR! I've heard great things about it but I've never really wanted to see it. That is hilarious that I'm quoting a movie I've never seen.

Carlisle is starting to make an impact on Edward though you're right--he's still quite stubborn.

Hehewuti does love her daughter even though she's cantakerous and bitchy. ;-) Nina's had some time to reflect on that awful first session and wished she could have handled it better, so she was actually feeling okay to see Edward again. Perhaps she sensed that he was going to tell her the truth this time. He was a little dumbstruck at the therapy invitation. :-)

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S, swim-girl!

You totally deserved this! I'm so excited for you!

I hope it will attract a bunch of new readers and reviewers.

(I had btw planned to catch up this evening, but some friends stopped by, so the last two chapter will have to wait until tomorrow. Looking forward to it! Hugs!)

Author's Response:

Pretty balloons! Thanks vamplicious.

I hope you had fun with your friends stopping by! I got to spend my evening with my best friend and she taught my book club a zumba class which was a total blast. I probably looked like a fool doing the dance steps but it made me happy.

Have a good week! Jen xx

Smart of you to let the bike- incident play out on the border of the Quileute land. I've been curious to find out how you would solve that little problem! :)

I like the idea of Edward actually being there, talking to her, when she heard his voice in these dangerous situations. It always annoyed me in canon, that she was only hallucinating...

 

<Edward clenched his teeth, and a hollow sensation began spreading throughout his chest, sorrow radiating from his cold, dead heart. "Jacob loves you," he softly choked out. "Go with him, my love. Be with him." He spun around, no longer able to look at her, and his tone was mournful. "Live your human life. He will never hurt you like I have.">

Aww...poor Edward. It was heartbreaking enough that he decided to leave her, but even worse that he's actually 'giving her' to Jacob. Very noble though - even though it's not really 'working'. :) Wonder when Edward realizes that staying away from Bella might not be the right way to fix her.

Great chapter.

 

Author's Response:

Thank goodness for the border! Though Edward may have to cross over to Quileute territory in a future chapter. *ominous music plays* I'm still trying to figure out how to do the Laurent scene.

We all missed Edward in New Moon, so I like the idea of him being there too. If only he wouldn't be so stubborn and actually come forward so that Bella could see him.

Edward, Edward, Edward. You are very noble (like vamplicious said). But you're making things worse by staying away from Bella! *smacks Ed upside the head* Hopefully he'll come to his senses soon.

So glad you're catching up on this fic! Thanks mucho vampster.

i like your thoughts on Nina's ability.  i do not have any thoughts to add right now.  i really do like the story.  i find it very different reading it from this point of view.  i am looking forward to reading more when you are able to update.  if i think of any ideas i will pass them on.

thank you for writing this story....

Author's Response:

Hi Karla! I'm thrilled you're liking the story so far. I wonder what percentage of the fics here are written in third person? I've actually never written in the first person and I'd like to try it some time--it just seems right since that's what SM used. I thought the first person perspective might be a little limiting, though, since I love to explore multiple character perspectives in the same scene, and my stories tend to end up long enough without repeating the same scene from different POV's! Thanks so much for leaving a review. Jen xx

stephenie meyer: " Edward can't read bella because she has a very private mind"

bullshit!!!

your reason makes a MILLION times more sense!!

 

 

you hit the nail on the head!!!! :)

Author's Response:

Is that what SM said? That explanation is a little lacking, I think. But she's the genius who came up with the clever idea of Bella's block in the first place, so she must know best. Anyway, I'm glad that you liked my little theory. Thanks so much, Cass! Jen xx

Nix,
*and Jen of course, and the other readers/reviewers too*

I agree Jen and I are saying almost the same thing. The point is that I believe Bella's selflessness is kind of "selfish" : it's her feelings she's protecting, her shyness which shows here. She just doesn't want people to interfere with her feelings, she doesn't want to share them, she's thinking she's not worth the trouble, but therefore she puts HER needs of privacy before the need other have for her to let them love her and take care of her.
Charlie is helpless to help her because she won't allow him to do so, and that's just hurting him to be/feel kicked off by his daughter...
This is why I think that Jen's idea of making him getting her to therapy is definitely the best use of a parent one could find : she doesn't let him help, she doesn't want to leave, nor to live, the best way to help her is to bring her to see someone whose job IS to help cope with an unberable situation...

you might answer me that #you do find Bella to be self-indulgent (self-pitying, wallowing in herself) at the moment. (Edward's not much better himself!)# and you wouldn't doubt that #She's protecting herself by not exposing her feelings#

:)

*sorry Jen for hijacking your reviews :)*

Author's Response:

Interesting discussion here, gals.

<< The point is that I believe Bella's selflessness is kind of "selfish" >>

I agree! We all feel good when we can take care of others, and Bella is denying others that opportunity. She is also not trusting others with the deepest parts of herself.

I think the extreme caretaking mentality can be selfish for another reason as well. If we are so externally focused, anticipating others' needs, we might take care of them in a way that is not really what they need, but is more about what we THINK they need. However, others are different from us, and we're not always good mindreaders. It's better to put out there what I need and to ask the other person what he/she needs, and try to come up with a compromise or negotiation.

<< This is why I think that Jen's idea of making him getting her to therapy is definitely the best use of a parent one could find : she doesn't let him help, she doesn't want to leave, nor to live, the best way to help her is to bring her to see someone whose job IS to help cope with an unberable situation... >>

Cool insight! Bella's not letting Charlie help her, so he's bringing her to somebody who (hopefully) can.

I'm not sure about your explanation why Edward can't read Bella's mind. But your idea is creative.

Other than that, I love the additional characters you created. He he, and the gift is SO Edward. :D

I really hope to see Ed in therapy with Nina again, too.

-- Voted for you at the Indie Twifics at the last minute. I hope you win - I found your story there and in the last evenings I just coldn't stop reading. :)

Author's Response:

Hey eniny! Thanks for your vote, and congratulations on graduating from college. I'm rather new to the fandom and there are scads of stories I want to read, including many of the Indie nominees. I started "The Weight of Words" and quite liked it. Did any really impress you?

I figured that helmet would be a very Edward gift! You will see him in therapy again. The boy needs help!

Thanks, Jen xx

Hey Jen!

What an incredibly well written chapter!  Reading it reminded me how much this fic deserves a catrillion Indie Twific Awards!  I like that it is up for Best Use of a Parent:  This story is something special - it sends a healthy message to *what I can only assume is* a massive fanbase of tweeny boppers.  I can tell that you love the characters as much as they do and want what’s best for them (the characters and the fans).  Did you notice that Mimiteh is the only finalist that even MENTIONS a parent in its summary?!

Only one complaint:  you can’t spell!  “Colour” and “favour” have ‘u’s in them, silly!!   ;)

I had thought that after Bella’s trip to the ER, news about her motor cycle accident would have gone all around town!   *Am I making it obvious that I haven’t quite read New Moon yet?*  ;)  But they LIED!  :O  Perhaps Edward thought the same thing when he left the helmet out in plain sight…

To answer the question you’ve asked numerous times, yes I intend to read New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.  I also intend to watch the movies some day.  Perhaps 2D movies will be a novelty by then.  ;)

The gift:  Bella instantly thinks of Edward!  …before she talks herself out of it.  Is there a specific reason why she didn’t allow him previously to give her gifts?  I know that he gave her a mixed CD… which he stole back!  *scandalous!*

<< Now she could add olfactory hallucinations to her growing list of crazy, including auditory and visual hallucinations. Begrudgingly she admitted that it probably wasn't a bad idea that she'd be seeing Nina in a half hour. >>

Hee hee.  Visual hallucinations?  But she hasn’t actually ‘seen’ Edward!  What has she seen?!

<< Jacob must have left the helmet for her. >>

Helping out the competition, ‘ey, Ed?  ;)

<< She was surprised he had not taped a note onto it, teasing her with an inside joke like "Foot Brakes = Skull Crackers" or "No horizontal parking allowed". >>

Immature little boy… *beneath the big muscles*

Charlie’s finding an excuse to pay Nina a visit, hey?  ;)  Some one should warn him that psychologists are bad news.  I hear they’re all crazier than their clients!

Throughout the chapter – Charlie is so transparent!!!  hee hee;)

<< "Hardly. Why do you think my head hurts so much?" >>

Hee hee.  Still not uber keen, huh?  She’s extremely co-operative, though.  Charlie couldn’t drag her there if she decided against it!

<< "Because Nina's about to shrink it?" >>

*groans*

<< "Nah, let's go to the diner tonight. Give you a break from cooking, okay? You do too much around here." >>

:)  He really does try to be a good dad.  I think he should learn to cook.  Parents are supposed to cook for their children – for their physical well being!  And if he really wants to impress Nina… or any other woman… then he’d better not expect them to do all the cooking all the time!

<< Bella … was vehemently shaking her head. Therapy was difficult enough without Charlie being there to witness the carnage. >>

I don’t blame her!  She has a lot more to deal with internally before they start dragging in relationships.  Not so easy to be open with dad around either.

<< “...I think the counseling is really helping her." … Bella was too surprised to be angry at him for talking about her like she wasn't there. >>

*slaps him for being condescending, even though unintentionally*  I’m sure if HE ever went to counselling, they’d drag up a whole lot of his own issues he needs to deal with.

<< "I'm most interested in hearing how you think therapy is going, Bella." >>  << The corners of Nina's eyes crinkled as she smiled genuinely. "It's good to see you too." >>

Better :)

<< "Sorry about that. He's kind of weird sometimes." >>

Hee hee. What a typical teenage daughter thing to say!  ;)

<< Edward halted his pacing and alternating mutters of "You should leave, stalker!" with "But what if Nina tells Bella about me? ">>

Kind of a stressful session for him – will she or won’t she??

<< Like Edward, Charlie was also muttering to himself. "Real smooth, Swan. Way to be a dork." >>

Hee hee

<<  How ridiculous that they both liked each other but were not acting on those feelings. >>

Erm *taps Edward politely on the shoulder*  *then SLAPS him!*  What the bleep do you think YOU (and Bella) are doing, nitwit!

<< Edward closed his eyes, filled with self-hatred. >>

What’s the point in hating yourself without taking action to CHANGE what you hate about yourself?

Edward doesn’t destroy his own happiness!  He just leaves the love of his life, to hide a few feet way, so they can both revel in their own self-deprived anguish. Throw in a young, shirtless werewolf…

Do you know which fictional character I feel strongly about?  Captain America.  Because I’m Awesome. 

Don’t be offended by Nina’s thoughts of you, Edward!  She hardly knows you.

Edward contemplated suicide when he thought that James had killed Bella??!  That’s not cool!  Books aimed at teenagers even suggesting that killing yourself if you lose ‘the love of your life’ would amount to an epic romance??! - Edward being the ultimate sensitive, romantic man!   *disturbed*

<< To his horror, Edward realized that Bella had begun to cry, and the full weight of his betrayal hit him squarely in the chest. The juxtaposition of him telling Bella that he had contemplated suicide when he thought he had lost her to James, next to him voluntarily leaving her, made him utterly disgusted with himself. >>

That IS quite a contradiction!!!

<< The lure of provoking the Volturi shined like a bright beacon in his mind, seeming almost more appealing now than during the aftermath of James' attack. >>  << his self-loathing >>

Edward, grow up!  FIX your *self created* problems, don’t wallow in them /  try and take the easy *cowardly* way out!  >8- l

<< At least Edward knew that Bella was safe this time. Well, she would be safe until she rode that damn motorcycle again. >>

Darn.  I thought for a sec that he was going to quit stalking…

<< "No," she cried, sniffing a couple of times, thinking about his superior beauty and grace. "It's not difficult to understand. It's not difficult at all." >>

*throws her hand up in the air*  I just don’t know what to do with you two!  You need professional he… Oh wait, you’re getting it  :)

<<  From the little she knew about Edward Cullen, it appeared that he had found his match in Bella Swan, at least in terms of equally low self-esteem. No wonder their relationship had ended. She could imagine that both of them had often misinterpreted each other when perceiving the relationship through a filter of self-deprecation, assuming that neither was good enough for each other. >>

So true! It’s almost as though Nina has read the series…… *suddenly wonders!*

<< What had she been thinking, inviting Edward back in to continue as her client? Now she was even more bound by rules of confidentiality, disallowing her to reveal Edward's concerns about Bella. >>

Brilliant reasoning!  ;)

<< "… I fell."  …  Nina smiled affectionately, recalling Bella's near wipe-out one of the first times she had entered the office. "You do that a lot, don't you? >>

Are there REALLY people who fall over that much in RL??  Maybe she has an inner ear problem…

<< Bella's cheeks blushed and her heart thumped, aware of … the destruction caused by Nina's father's motorcycle accident. >>  << She was terrified that Bella might suffer the same fate as her father or Billy from toying with dangerous motorcycles  >>

Of course!  Bella knows that motorbikes would be a really sensitive topic to raise in a session!

<< Edward's thoughts turned to Jacob. How could he have let Bella ride that infernal bike, knowing what had happened to his own father? >>

Stupid kid!

<< she was bound not to share how she knew about Bella riding a motorcycle >> << "I'm concerned about you getting hurt, Bella," Nina eventually managed. "You sustained such a bad cut that you needed stitches, yet you won't tell me how it happened." >>

Nice and vague…  *well done, Nina!*

That is SOME explanation for why Bella and Nina block Edward out!  I liked how Edward, using vampire hyper-speed, flashed through all that he knew about them both.  Bella and Nina DO have a lot in common… their history of caring for others…

<< Had Bella and Nina been so externally focused their entire lives, caring for others far more extensively than for themselves, that their internal structures had become underdeveloped and inaccessible? >>     Maybe!  *mind boggled*  

<< Had their combined caring for their emotionally and/or physically needy mothers, set in place from childhood, somehow blocked their ability to care for their own needs? >>     This happens all the time!

<< Had they unconsciously constructed a wall around their internal worlds, thwarting others from caring for them? >>    Or keeping their inner worlds buried/hidden, while getting on with the task of putting other people first?

Whew!  *glad she doesn’t give a STUFF about other people*  *hence becoming a lawyer*

<< And why could Edward hear Nina's thoughts when they were self-directed, yet not hear Bella's thoughts at all? >>

Bella’s a more severe case than Nina?  Maybe Nina’s developed some self worth over the years.  Perhaps she’s had her own counselling – she’s a believer in therapy after all!  If that’s the case, then Bella could have one day ALSO (partially) let down her shield… if she didn’t freeze her body at one point in time by becoming a vampire.

<< Nina had to make Bella stop endangering herself. But how could that happen when Bella seemed incapable of considering her own health and safety? >>

Bella’s difficult, Edward!  Deal with it.  She’s going to have to deal with YOUR weaknesses…. Hopefully Nina can help these two terribly lost individuals find their way back together – this time as whole individuals who can stick together through thick and thin (not duck out of there the next time they feel that the other would be better off without them!)  She’s got her work cut out for her!!!  ;D

PS  One factor that may be causing you to have a disproportionate number of email alerts on the other site in relation to reviews may be that people prefer to review here?  (Or because we all know that reviews are evil things, no better than round or symmetrical numbers!)  :)

Lovely story, lovely writing, Jen!  *sends winning vibes your way*  ;)

Author's Response:

*dives in to responding to another mega-review* Your support of my Indie Twific nomination has been so stellar! Who cares if I win the category when I get love like that from my cyber friends!

I'd like to start with this comment:

<<  How ridiculous that they both liked each other but were not acting on those feelings.

Erm *taps Edward politely on the shoulder*  *then SLAPS him!*  What the bleep do you think YOU (and Bella) are doing, nitwit!>>

*laughs* I was TOTALLY thinking of you and your likely response when I wrote that line. And I totally expected you to slap Edward for being so freaking OBTUSE! :D

Smut definitely has its place and there are a lot of wonderful NC-17 fics here, but I do enjoy writing a "clean" story. It's more my style, and it feels right when there are so many teenage readers here. Too bad none of them are reading this. HA!

Now that is not very nice BEHAVIOUR to be cracking on my spelling, young lady! Oh goody, I can't wait for you to read the series. Regarding the visual hallucinations, I think I let the movie influence me there. She just heard him in the book I think.

<< Is there a specific reason why she didn’t allow him previously to give her gifts? >>

That stems back to her selflessness and unworthy feelings. Silly girl! He wanted to buy her a gorgeous car!

Did you get the little joke that "horizontal parking" = CRASH? Clever motorcycle humor!

Good idea--let's enroll Charlie in cooking classes. I think it's in Eclipse that he screws up SPAGHETTI. He's hopeless.

<< Edward doesn’t destroy his own happiness!  He just leaves the love of his life, to hide a few feet way, so they can both revel in their own self-deprived anguish. Throw in a young, shirtless werewolf… >>

Nice summary. I especially liked the "shirtless" part.

<< *throws her hand up in the air*  I just don’t know what to do with you two!  You need professional he… Oh wait, you’re getting it  :) >>

hee hee. The professional help is taking a while to kick in! Maybe Bella should also see a medical doctor for that inner ear problem . . .

<< So true! It’s almost as though Nina has read the series…… *suddenly wonders!* >>

HA HA! Next to "Life Without Ed" on her bookshelf sits "Breaking Dawn". ;-)

<< Bella’s a more severe case than Nina?  Maybe Nina’s developed some self worth over the years.  Perhaps she’s had her own counselling – she’s a believer in therapy after all!  If that’s the case, then Bella could have one day ALSO (partially) let down her shield… if she didn’t freeze her body at one point in time by becoming a vampire. >>

Without giving too much away, I love what you said here.

<< Or keeping their inner worlds buried/hidden, while getting on with the task of putting other people first? >>

I liked that. I could have a whole counseling practice with caretaking women. They're ubiquitous. But I think Bella has taken it to the extreme.

<< Whew!  *glad she doesn’t give a STUFF about other people*  *hence becoming a lawyer* >>

*rolls on the floor* Thanks for the laughs!

<< Hopefully Nina can help these two terribly lost individuals find their way back together – this time as whole individuals who can stick together through thick and thin (not duck out of there the next time they feel that the other would be better off without them!)  She’s got her work cut out for her!!!  ;D >>

*crosses my fingers*

*claps for an amazing review* You're the best, Nixie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Great discussion between father and son!

Author's Response:

Thank you. It was about time!

Author's Response:

Hmm, a blank review. Is this like a projective test? Is my response indicative of my personality? ;-)

I think he left her a helmet. Im really enjoying this story. I hope you win in the twific awards, I voted for you.

Author's Response:

Thank you, Gwenn. It looks like the "Best Use of Parent" category has a wide variety of stories so I have no idea how it will pan out, but I appreciate your vote. A helmet, eh? I'd say that was a very good guess! Jen xx