My Dearest Steph,

That was simply heart-wrenching.  Anyone who has written something like this will attest to how difficult it is to write something like this.  You have done it like a maestro.  I am sure all those who have experienced this in real-life will also agree that you have done the experience justice.

There is so much for Rob and Jen to experience still after this.  Thank you for your sensitivity to your readers.  I am sure they will all appreciate you more for it.

Wonderful job, dear.  Thank you for redeeming my Nicky... LOL.  But seriously, this was excellent.

ILY X Infinity

M

Author's Response:

thank you so much hun. i had to make you my last review of the night. there are so many others, but i had to get to yours tonight.

thank you. this was probably the most difficult thing i have ever written, and posting it was even harder. your appreciation means so much to me. i can't even begin to tell you how touched and overwhelmed i am tonight. 

they have so much more to deal with... it is so true... but there is hope and faith, love and family... and that's what matters.

and Nick... it was always in the cards to redeem him... since the first meeting... what a long hard journey he and i have had. my feet are so sore walking with him down that road... and i am so happy to see so many offer a positive comment on him... i'm still sending Rl Nick a gift basket when this is all over... 

thank you so much bb. it means so much to have you here, to be my friend and to be the absolutely beautiful person you are. thank you so much . 

love you to infinity and beyond.

steph

Hey there girl, I am still trusting you?!!! But soooo much for a whole box of Kleenex!!!  Please update quickly, My heart needs it!!!!

Author's Response:

thanks so much my dear. have faith. i'll get us thru... there may not be schmexy times for a little bit, but I'll get us thru...

yeah.... Kleenex sales went up in my household! and now reading the reviews, i am crying all over again! 

i will get the next chapter up as soon as i can. It's written

thanks my dear!

MWAH!

steph

Two and a half months? THAT'S IT? Realy? It seems like they've been together for years...WOW!

I am both happy and sad for Jen right now.

Sad because she lost another baby.

Happy because she is able to get pregnant and can have another chance (according to Mike) to get pregnant in the future and because she doesn't have cancer.

I'm also glad that you brought up this topic because this happens to a lot of people all over the world.

 

Your stories are amazing and I can't wait for the next chapter!

Author's Response:

so hard to believe isn't it? i had to set up a Google calendar to keep it straight! but their love is that rare kind that defies time... it really does... 

i totally understand the happy/sad... she has lost, but she has gained a hope that there is a chance. 

its a topic that gets brushed under the carpet... but so many have experienced. i would do a disservice to so many that have been through this or had trouble conceiving if it were magical..

thank you so much my dear. it means so much to me to hear so many wonderful thoughts from so many!

so hapy to hear you are enjoying the stories!

more soon, promise!

MWAH!

steph

really good true to heart

Author's Response:

thank you so much.

I am so glad you enjoyed it! it was the most difficult thing to post. 

thanks so much for the read review and rate!

MWAH!

steph

I had to let it sit overnight before I reviewed. It's honestly a great chapter. I agree with you that it is too soon for them to having a baby. I'm surprised Nick's POV was in there. It was kind of nice. Now I feel really bad for both Jen and Rob. I'm surprised that Nick called Clare. I can't wait to see what happens there. I have a feeling that the next update will be too far away ;) But I shall wait patiently. Great Job!

-Em

Author's Response:

thanks so much Em... 

i completely understand waiting to respond. i read all the reviews as they started coming in... but it has been so overwhelming to respond... so i am doing so little by little... I am so glad you liked it... it was so difficult to remain quiet while everyone grew more excited....

I am sooo glad you enjoyed Nicks POV... nick is on a path of redemption.... he is not forgiven... but he has some things he knows he needs to do to help... and Clare was one of them... he's still in manager mode, and knows Rob can't be there... Mum is the next best thing.

will try to get the next update up for the weekend... 

thanks so much my dear! your reviews always mean so much to me!

MWAH!

steph

Well done Steph. Beautifully and sensitively written. So sad for all concerned, but I fully support your story's direction and all the points you made in your A/N. This continues to be a wonderful story and I love all your characters. So glad Nick and Jen will see each other in a better light. Looking forward to your next update.

Author's Response:

thanks so much my dear.

thank you so much for all your support you have given me throughout this journey. it means so much! 

Nick is on the road to redemption... not forgiven yet... maybe never.. but he is trying... 

thanks so much hun. i will update as soon as i can.

MWAH!

steph

Oh Steph how could you?! I thought we were friends. Friends don’t do that to each other! First off, I agree with everything you said in your authors note, secondly I’m not angry at you. I am amazed, distraught, stunned, shocked, incensed, and most of all absolutely staggered at your creative ability. When I finished reading this chapter, some hours ago now, I was crying my eyes out, pacing up and down my living room, wishing there was something I could do to help Jen. My daughter was looking at me as if she thought I was nuts. Seriously, I think she considered having me committed. I feel as though Jen is a dear friend of mine and I just want to help her. OK, perhaps my daughter didn’t get it all that wrong! I decided that writing a review straight away wasn’t the best idea; as I said I was a bit distraught, but now I’m ok. I think.

Obviously we could all see the pregnancy thing happening, but I for one didn’t ever think that you would write something so gut wrenchingly devastating for Rob and Jen to have to go through. I’ve read plenty of Edward/Bella, Rob/whoever stories where a baby comes along and makes everything happy and rosy and I am glad really that you haven’t gone down that route at this point. There are far too many stories where children are the magic cement that holds everything together and yes, of course, there are very many happy relationships that work, but as a bitter divorcee (my husband left when our children were 2 and 4) I get a bit sick of the happy family thing . (See; bitter and twisted divorcee.) And don’t get me started on Breaking Dawn, this review/tirade/monologue is going to be long enough as it is. So, back to Rob and Jen, it really is too soon in their relationship, too soon in Rob’s life and, yes, I have to say it too soon in his career to think about a baby.  Still didn’t see this shocker coming though.

 Poor, poor Jen. How on earth will she survive this second loss? Yes, she is going to get counselling, yes, she has a whole new family to support her, but she must be so devastated. I’m glad that Clair will be there for her, Jen needs a Mum right now. She obviously hasn’t yet got over the loss of her husband and child, could this be a problem? Is jen really ready to move on?

And Rob. I imagine that he will feel just a tiny bit guilty when he finds out. First he wasn’t there and second that he caused this to happen, and third that he wasn’t there; I mean, the guy is going to go completely nuts with guilt, I would think. Cos he wasn’t even there. Yes, he is going to be hard to handle. And being kept in the dark about it, lied to even is going to make him so angry.

I am fortunate in that I have never had to deal with this kind of loss personally, but from what I have seen the repercussions can go both ways. It can draw a couple together or can split them apart. I am not willing to make any guesses as to how you are going to play this one out; you have thrown me completely with this chapter, so I can’t even try to guess! You have promised a HEA so I will cling to that!

If we are really, really lucky, Rob and Jen will get through everything together, because frankly it would be a crime for Bel Ami not to get made (I am so looking forward to that film) and they need to get on with their lives together.

Bit of a new development with Nick. Don’t say he is going to turn out to be a good guy. Though, I would think that Rob will never forgive him for sending that text from Jen. Even though it was what Jen wanted, I don’t think that it is something that Rob would be able to overlook. Ever.

I shouldn’t say this after this chapter, because the story here is just so taken up with the main events but I’m afraid I’m  going to have to say it again because I feel it even more strongly now than before; I so would like to see a third story from Nicks POV. And not just a chapter or two now, (sorry!) but the whole story, in fact even telling a bit of the back story from when Nick first started managing Rob; the crazy reception to the Twilight film, Comiccon and the fans reactions, the madness of premiers and press conferences, how Rob dealt with the pressure before he met Jen, what Nicks aspirations are for Robs career and for his own. Any indiscretions of Robs that he has had to cover up or buy off. And then his reaction to first finding out about Jen and the whole roller coaster ride since then. Yes, Nicks is a story I would so love to read. Because after all, you are only writing two amazing stories at the same time and posting them weekly, that’s not much!

OK, having thrown all of that at you (serves you right!) I’m going to read the chapter again, and then pace up and down biting my nails until you post the next one. And don’t think that you can get away with throwing two OTT’s at us (great as that would be). Update THIS story soon!! Please!

Author's Response:

My dearest. I saw you post on OTT and read that you were coming here next, and i was nervous...and then you didn't review, and i knew you must be processing.. the next morning i read this and cried... thank you so much. really and truly... i can't even begin to tell you how overwhelmed i am over the responses, but yours... i had to take some time as well...

To know that readers such as yourself take such an invested interest in RobJen is not crazy by my book, it thrills me to no end. I have become so wrapped up in the story, to know that there are others that feel this emotions... it is wonderful...thank you for that.

This chapter, and the next few, have worn on me for so long. This route was planned pretty early on... And to read, chapter after chapter (and some guessed very early one waaaay back in the day....)was hard to do.. so much joy from so many readers that guessed she was pregnant. heartwrenching... i will admit... i waffled at one point... i almost changed it. But that would have been a disservice to them... really. i know that sounds awful. 

i never wanted this to be a fluffy easy sort of story. I have been so excited to bring real emotions, real struggles to this story, so this was always in the cards...and it was a card i wanted to play for Nick as well. A way for him to redeem himself... Nick finding her at Rob's has been in my head since probably back in October... such a long hard road for he and i to walk... as we got closer to here, the hatred for him was so great... i had no idea if he would eve be able to make amends. I am hoping he is on the right path...

They are going to have so much to deal with. Jen will hit bottom. Jen will need all the support she can get... And rob will be a mess when he learns of it all... of being kept out of the loop, of not being there, of being somewhat responsible (it takes two)...but I have promised a HEA, and i am sticking to it... it's written... so... heehee...oh not that its happening any time soon... sorry...didn't mean to scare... i write out of sequence sometimes...LOL!

NIck... going back to nick as i go down your review... he will always be an asshole... that's his job.. and Rob will not forgive him of many things... but Rob will see that Nick made some mistakes... maybe even see that Nick can do some good in his life with a short leash. Maybe rob will take some control.... just saying.. but no... Nick IS still an asshole... 

*clutching my heart and pulling out the carpal tunnel brace* LOL! omg a nick story! i spewed my beer when i first read that, just so you know! ahhhh. let me get thru NTE... I do want to do some outtakes from Nicks POV. hell i want to do some Clare and Mack truck ones too... but i will get thru NTE first... we'll see... ow my carpal tunnel! 

hahaha. i have just submitted ch 20 of OTT, and as soon as it posts, will throw NTE 57 up...i want to get it up as soon as i can as welll.

thank you so much my dear. seriously. you don't know how much it means to me to read your review. maybe this will take up an entire page...that would be awesome... 

you inspire me my dear! thank you so much for that!

more soon! 

MWAH!

steph

 

this was beautifuly sad. cant wait to read more soon xx

Author's Response:

thanks so much dearest.

so glad you enjoyed it.

more soon, always!

MWAH!

steph

Great last two chapters. I agree - modern medicine is wonderful for women - I'm pretty sure my daughter and I would be underground now without it helping us through child birth.

Love your Jen - she needs a break. An nice to see the beginnings of the redemption of Nick. He is a great realistic tough bastard - just what you need in the industry.

 

 

Author's Response:

thank you so much my dear. yeah. my son and i would have died in childbirth just 25 years ago... i have faith in modern medicine...

so glad you like the Nick road... he and i have been walking on glass for months... this has been a chapter long coming for him... he needs to be an asshole on so many levels, but he is on his path of redemption here for the things he should have protected... 

Jen has a lot to deal with, and she needs Rob to truly heal.... she'll get her day soon, i promise...

thank you my dear.

mwah!

steph

OMG how SAD!  Very emotional!  I really wish you would bring Rob in to be with her though.  He needs to be there!!  I understand Jens reasoning but dont shut him out! PLEASE! He needs to know the truth and he should be taking care of her. Beautiful chapter.  I read it lat night and was just truly sad when I went to bed  Sad at her loss and also sad that Rob was not with her.  Looking forward to an update!  Thank you for the wonderful story and all you put into it.

Author's Response:

thank you so much my dear... i fully agree about Rob... he needs to know and he needs to be there... let's see what happens... He is pretty intuitive...

i will try to get the update up as soon as i can... 

thank you for reading, what i put into it is = to all the love you guys continue to give Jen and Rob, and for that i am forever grateful...

mwah!

steph

My faith in your integrity has never faltered. This story is my favorite fan fic out there. You write beautifully. And the points you made in the AN were spot on. They have only been together a short time. Rob's entire life could crash down around him if he became a father this soon. And finally, as a registered nurse, I respect the fact that you chose to portray the realities of how difficult this pregnancy would/could be. Thank you for not sugar-coating every little nuance of their lives. It makes them more real and believable. It makes me hurt with them. Next chapter soon I hope. :)

Author's Response:

thanks so much my dear. that truly means the world to me. this was a difficult chapter to write, and even harder to post...

Thank you for seeing my points... it really does mean so much to me when readers understand and support this story as they do...

oh thank you on the medical issues here... i did a lot of research, drove my OB a little crazy, and have a medical staff standing by...i wanted to make sure it wasn't too vague.. i still may miss some points.. but i knew i had some in the fold here that would know what was going on. and truly. i don't want to belittle those that have been through this... now does this mean she won't ever be able to have a child... 

*grins* there is always hope... the things i have found during the scope of researching this is staggering....

thank you my dearest. i will try and get the next chapter up as soon as i can... with the movie coming out this week, who knows...

but as soon as i can...

MWAH!

steph

That was one stressful chapter for poor Jen!  Thank you for knocking her out for a bit so she can actually get some rest.  She sure needs it.  And some food.  

Okay...where to start?  I guess part of her "flu" was the miscarriage, and part was just pure nerves about LA and what she had to deal with there.  The nerves especially would be understandable.  I'm curious, because she's obviously such an extremely high-risk pregnancy candidate, will they tie her tubes?  You can still harvest eggs for using a surrogate IF they want to take that route, and in the long run, it could save her a LOT of heartache.  

I'm very interested in what poor Rob will have to say about this. He's already concerned because of her illness, and of course he's not going to think she lied to him...Jen didn't know.  I can imagine that it was hard for you to keep quiet about this chapter, and as someone who needs to kind of keep quiet about her own story, I totally understand the desire to talk about it, lol.  

I was completely surprised that Nick was so good about helping her.  Not that he wouldn't help, but that he was so willing to do so, and obviously more than the bare minimum necessary.  I'm a little weirded out about his vast knowledge about Jen's past, but I suppose he had some kind of hardcore background check done on her during his "snooping" stage.  

Hmm...I'm sure there's a lot more I wanted to say, but it's all mush in my brain right now, lol.  I'll just PM you or chat you up if I think of it.  

G'night, bb, and great chapter!

xoxo Sarah

 

Author's Response:

thanks hun... this chapter has weighed heavily on me for a while now, especially with all the happy preggers talk...sigh... and yes, she needed to be out of it for a bit. expect more... 

What was it all... let's see... stress.. the miscarriage and a staph infection. the stress probably aggravated it all to an extreme... 

ahh will they tie her tubes... we'll find out more coming up...one of the things Dr. Douglass would have discussed had she not run was that option. and really it should have been done when they operated... the joys of medical mishaps...

Rob... sigh... he will definitely not blame her, but will he blame himself? and what about her trying to protect him by not telling him... no good can come of that...yes...it was EXTREMELY hard to keep quiet about this particular chapter, given the fact i knew it would be written way back in like.....september... even my poor beta was in the dark up until about a month ago...very difficult indeed, and can i say what a weight was lifted yesterday when it posted...

Nick... his help is something of a need to redeem... don't get me wrong.. he will always be the asshole, he needs to be a hard ass inhis job... but he knows he screwed up past the point of proper professionalism (something i hope we will see as the chapters for both this and OTT post...) Jen's past... yeah..... that is pretty scary... but he was out to crush her in december... it is scary what you can find out...

sigh... i understand mush... i am truly overwhelmed by the response to this chapter... so much love in this community. i am just... gah... overwhelmed.

thanks so much my dear... yep chat me up whenever you want... thank you for all your support. it means so much to me!

MWAH!

steph

Brilliant, Gut wrenching,Powerful, simply AMAZING!!!

I am left almost speechless by the depth of pain and how well you wrote this chapter.  I knew she was preggers and knew she would not be able to keep in.  You still managed to surprise me and he detail. So craftly written, equisite detail.  You drew us on to this path that we could not deter from. I was mesmorized

you should be proud of your talent

Author's Response:

thank you so much. your words are so inspiring to me. it was a difficult chapter to write and the hardest to post. I am so glad you enjoyed it!

more soon!

MWAH!

steph