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Reviewer: vamppy (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 08:57 AM · On: Chapter 38

ohh poor edward always conflicted hopefully he just goes for her soon :

Author's Response:

He starts getting his act together.  He has some reasons for being as he is. :-)

Reviewer: none (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 06:45 AM · On: Chapter 27

I'm an RN and I am impressed by your research. My father was an MD

and his mantra was "First of all, do no harm".   My Mom told me that he

wept (with her privately) when he lost his first surgical patient. Fifty-seven

 former patients attended his funeral, writing things in the book like "honest

doctor"  and "saved my daughter's life".

Very good chapter--rang true.    


Author's Response:

Thank you!  I'm really glad it did.  I think doctors have a terrible time because they really want to help people, and when they can't, it's a big blow -- both to their desire to help as well as to the knowledge they spend so much time and effort acquiring.  A friend of mine is a doctor and he once told me that medicine is as much an art as a science.  Some is plain ol' instinct.  And it's so frustrating to be WRONG, not only because it's embarrassing but because it doesn't just show up YOUR failings -- it impacts the patient.  I think it's even worse for Edward who puts SO much stock in his intellect and abilities ... but he can't beat death.

Reviewer: happymoon35 (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 06:37 AM · On: Chapter 38

I for one am very grateful for the 3 chapters in a week - I love this story for it's adult nature and interesting plot. :)

I thought the internal Edward monologue about breaking down walls was interesting and I could see how you were using Edward eating in front of Bella as a metaphor for breaking down those barriers.  Interestinly, I was a bit frustrated with Bella in this chapter.  It seems like so much of this story is Edward having to walk on eggshells around Bella, and so much of his life is dictated by her schedule, needs, wants, and limitations.  But she doesn't seem to be able to give him much of the same.  Not eating in front of a human Bella seems like a limitation Edward imposed on himself in order to control the animal inside of him - he is a vampire, after all.  It would be nice to see Bella respecting and trying to better understand Edward's limits sometime so that it seems like their relationship is more equal.

Author's Response:

She does, and will.  But it was absolutely crucial that he be able to bare the truly UGLY side of being a vampire to her.  All he showed her before was the superhero side, and he hid the ugly parts behind excuses about the danger.  It's less dangerous than he pretends.  Notice here how they managed the actual danger versus exagerating the danger.  That's where Edward needs to get to.  And a lot of his bending to Bella has also been necessary because he left her before.  She was justifiably angry with him.  He had things to prove.  But he's proved them, and she's moving back into love with him.  She'll be asking him some key questions in future chapters, coming to understand some things she hasn't before, partly because she was too young to REALLY understand them, and partly because Edward himself has not been fully aware of how they've impacted him.  But there are reasons for his extreme need to control, and Bella will get to the bottom of it -- helping them both, in the end. :-)

Reviewer: Rahveryn (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 06:13 AM · On: Chapter 38

Three excellent chapters.  Thank you for their rapidity, I feel almost spoiled.  I love Edwards epiphany.  A Possim?  cute.  These 3 chapters were a pleasent turning point in this story, I've been looking forward too.

Thanks again, I wish all manner of mental and physical stamina for grading papers next week, and I'm eagerly awaiting the next installment :)

Author's Response:

Yes, 3 very pivotal parts!  And the opossum is meant to be both comic relief but also deadly serious business. :-)

Reviewer: Aille (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 05:59 AM · On: Chapter 38

Oh, I just loved this chapter & Edward's first day back.  That ring really threw him for a loop.  I'm glad he stood up for her against the idiot.  I think Bella would have smacked him hard if she had heard it.

I'm also very glad that Edward got a clue and finally let her see him eat.  This is a very sweet and deep chapter.  I look forward to even more.

Author's Response:

Thanks!  And I doubt they're going to be regularly sharing meals! Ha!  But it was a REALLY important step for him.

Reviewer: octoberiste (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 05:48 AM · On: Chapter 38

i gasped when i saw the update email. no way, three chapters in one week? i love you, definitely. great chapter. edward is so interesting, and your edward is much more dynamic than he is in the books.

Author's Response:

Thanks!  And yeah, I could hardly believe three in one week either!

Reviewer: jedishelly1 (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 05:13 AM · On: Chapter 38

Fantastic seems Edward is finally getting some realistic self-knowledge...about time too!!!

Author's Response:

Yes, a lot of his illusions have been revealed as illusions.  Now, can he learn to live in the real world?

Reviewer: KnoKnayme (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 04:52 AM · On: Chapter 38


Author's Response:


Reviewer: oceanluvr3 (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 04:37 AM · On: Chapter 9

Is there any way that this could become a Carlisle and Bella story?

I wish.

Author's Response:

No, sorry.  It's all plotted out. And I have personal issues with adultery anyway.  Carlisle and Esme may not be living together at present, but they're still married.

Reviewer: maisydaze (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 04:29 AM · On: Chapter 38

the ending of this chapter was really wonderful...thanks

Author's Response:

And thank you!

Reviewer: BloodRedNight (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 04:25 AM · On: Chapter 38

Oh hell yes I love you   *hugs*  


And  damn  its nice to see Edward getting his head out of his ass,  maybe he can realize he is about as mature and capable of making decisions about others wellbeing as a rabid hamster.   Now lets hope he can start listening to people and actually weighing their advice and opinions instead of assuming he is right.     


Am I the only one who thinks Edward was a seriously depressed and self destructive human before he was turned?

Author's Response:

I'm not sure how he was as a human, but he might have had depressive tendencies.  I think some of his problem is just that he was very YOUNG.  Then he got turned and all these thoughts of others, some much, much older than him, came crashing in with information and knowledge he just wasn't ready for.  I think that must have been very traumatic for him and led him to some rigid thinking.  I hope I can address all of that a little later in the story, but we'll see.

Anyway, I cracked up laughing at the rabid hamster remark.  Poor Edward's biggest problem is his ability to hear thoughts and how much they make him think he knows.

Reviewer: callmebells (Signed) · Date: March 20, 2009 02:33 AM · On: Chapter 1

This is my first review of your story, I've had so much to say but I haven't been able to stop reading long enough to post anything. lol I hope you'll take that as a compliment. I'm only reviewing now because I have finally caught up and there aren't any more chapters to read. *sadface*

If it's not obvious yet, I absolutely love everything you've done so far. The maturity, realness, and depth you bring to all the characters from Twilight delights and humbles me.  You've grown them all up beautifully with insight and humanity.

You write very strong, proud, and heartbreaking women. I found myself telling a girlfriend about your story today and realized it seems almost a natural progression of the Twilight saga - more so now, I think, than Breaking Dawn.  I wasn't completely disappointed in Breaking Dawn because I did want to see Bella turned, but it lacked the real conflict of life. It was a fairy tale ending to a fairy tale love story and I suppose I understand why SM went in that direction, but I'm finding that I relate to your story on a much deeper level.  The level that speaks to people who have lived through hardships to impart their wisdom, the level that has known, lost, and found love again in unexpected places. In short, on a human level.

I can't wait for more chapters, and if you ever decide to write a book, I would happily stand in line to purchase it.

Author's Response:

Oh, I'm really glad you like it!  You said: "You write very strong, proud, and heartbreaking women."

THANK YOU!!!!  I have worked really hard to show not just the Cullen women, but also Martha, and Irene, and even Hannah as interesting, different and strong, if not always perfect.  As a woman writer, I feel it's important to write women who readers can really identify with, and even respect.  So I'm thrilled you felt that you could.  Thanks again!

Reviewer: none (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 10:50 PM · On: Chapter 20

Author's Response:

Oh ... *pats*

Reviewer: JuliannaOphelia (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 10:19 PM · On: Chapter 37

I'm glad to see you've done your research! Very impressive.

Author's Response:


Reviewer: Gattina (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 09:37 PM · On: Chapter 37

Ah this was the perfect reprieve after a week of midterms!! I do not think I can express how much I enjoy this fic. I truly love the depth of aall the characters and the use of Martha as both a way of freeing Bella from her past, and yet still tying her to the Jackson family. The details on how the venom not being able to reverse 'healed' injuries was very interesting to me (me being a prospective biologist!) and I too was thinking on whether or not the change would be able to allow her to walk again. Once again, I appreciate your attention to detail and I strive to be such a writer! Bravo and I cannot wait to read the new developments! =)

Author's Response:

Thank you!  I'm glad my theories on venom aren't completely out there to science types (which I SO am not).  I love letting the characters grow up a little -- or try at least!

Reviewer: crystaldreams (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 06:37 PM · On: Chapter 37

Great chapter! I enjoyed reading Martha's visit. I also liked how you handled Bella taking off her wedding ring. It was done very classy. 'She picks up the small vase with her blank left hand.' That was a great way to symbolize that and not overdue it!

Thanks for updaing so quickly! Can't wait for the next one!!!

Author's Response:

Thanks!  I'm a big believer in understatement sometimes. :-)

Reviewer: InLustWithEC (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 05:58 PM · On: Chapter 37

So sad that Hannah is back, but I expected it anyway.  I'm glad that Martha's visit went well and I loved how she was able to tell Bella it's ok to love again and that it was time to take off the ring.  You made me cry but it was a nice cry so I forgive you :)

The white rose was a nice touch.  Not obtrusive, just nice.  WTG mature Edward :)

Can't wait for more.

Author's Response:

Heh.  Edward has grown up a bit.  He still has issues (as will be seen in the next chapter), but he's getting there!

Reviewer: tina_cullen (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 09:54 AM · On: Chapter 37

I am in tears right now. And I shouldn't be. Your writing is flawless and the story is a work of art.. Thank you. Please update soon

Author's Response:

Wow!  Thank you! :-)  And the next update will actually be in a few days.  These parts have each just ... flowed.

Reviewer: Capricorn75 (Signed) · Date: March 19, 2009 03:07 AM · On: Chapter 37

Love your explanation on vampire eating habits. You really do cover every detail, either in the chapters themselves or in the notes.

Author's Response:

Thanks!  I reckon I just like to think things through! :-)

Reviewer: Mom of 2 in WI (Signed) · Date: March 18, 2009 11:11 PM · On: Chapter 37

I'm guessing that Martha knows that something isn't right with the Cullens. She's too astute to miss the glaring differences between them and the human world.  Keep up the great work.  I'll be anxious to read the next one...

Author's Response:

Martha really hasn't seen quite enough of them, yet.  She's only seen Rose once when she first got there.  Esme once that morning.  And Alice once at the shop.  So that helps.  But she is perceptive, so ... ;>

Reviewer: JAustenlover (Signed) · Date: March 18, 2009 09:40 PM · On: Chapter 37

Great chapter! Glad to see the update on activity at the shelter and Martha - who, by the way, did not let me down. She is a strong and realistic woman - she is very loving in her treatment of Bella and does not have expectations that Bella will mourn forever.

I love the way these characters grow in your story! They have purpose and meaning. The rose was a lovely very sweet!

And I am THRILLED in anticipation for the visit from Perfectward (I called him that on the  IN the Blink thread over on the forum also - you have done such an incredible job with Edward - he is my absolute favorite Edward).

What a fresh and different story this is! Thank you!

Author's Response:

Martha is so much fun to write.  It's also useful that she's a pastor, so she knows things, and sees/understands things that most people either don't see or don't fully "get."

And yes, lots of Edward in the next chapter.  He's going to be facing some questions and issues and things due to the Loss of The Ring.  Which is a big deal. ha.  (Well, a big deal to him, actually less of one for Bella!)

Reviewer: windchime (Signed) · Date: March 18, 2009 09:11 PM · On: Chapter 37

I'm enjoying this story so much - leaving the rose, unadorned and unidentified, was a lovely touch.  I hope the next chapter is up soon.  I'm interested to see Edward's reaction to Bella taking off her ring.

Author's Response:

I've been working on the new chapter off and on.  There's a lot I want to do in it, so we'll see how soon it gets done (and how long it is).

Reviewer: Killerbunys (Signed) · Date: March 18, 2009 08:43 PM · On: Chapter 37

Again!  So soon?!  Yeah!!

I cried with Bella, kinda hard.  But it was good.

I live only slightly west of the Mississippi (a little south and east of Minisinoo), but we do hear about mountain lions from time to time.  Until recently state officials insisted they were extinct around here.  Then a local sherrif's deputy caught one on his dash cam with a deer that was down.

We are all too familar with deer.  I've never hit one myself, but came close plenty of times.  Nice touches of reality.  I agree with you, the Cullens would be responsible.

Author's Response:

I grew up in the country, so I thought I knew ALL about wildlife.  Then I moved to Alaska!  WOW.  I really can't believe the wildlife that we get even in urban areas here.  Back in Georgia, we had to be sure the trashcans were sealed to keep out the coons.  HERE, it's BEARS.  Jesus H. Christ! LOL!  So I could see why the Cullens would like Alaska!

Reviewer: Dinka (Signed) · Date: March 18, 2009 06:53 PM · On: Chapter 6

i'm intrigued with your story!!  i just began reading it but i cant seen to just stop - the circumstances are just heart breaking - i mean Bella in a wheelchair and a widow?!?!?!?  Overall great!!!  OK back to reading....

Author's Response:

I hope you continue to like it!  Thanks!

Reviewer: SuburbanSun (Signed) · Date: March 18, 2009 06:41 PM · On: Chapter 37

Sorry about my epic fail at reviewing lately! I have definitely been enjoying where things are going, despite that.

I know it's been said before, but I love how you don't succumb to the old standby stereotypes about the Cullens-- Rose isn't a bitch; she's just an introvert. They all have facets that were largely overlooked in canon and are almost completely overlooked in fanfic, but you never fall into that trap. It makes a story about all the Cullens infinitely more readable and enjoyable. 

I see what you mean about Bella grieving for her grief. Despite that, parts of this chapter still made me sad-- in a good, necessary way. I find myself feeling much like Bella must-- I'm excited for things to start happening (or continue happening) between Bella and Edward, but I also feel a little guilty for feeling that way, reading about Mark and Martha and remembering how much Bella truly loved him. Life is hard that way.

I'm glad that Edward's kept his distance during Martha's visit. Not just for fear of Martha becoming suspicious, but because Bella doesn't need that added layer of stress in her life while Martha is there. It's sweet of him to recognize that and back off, even while at the same time leaving her the rose. He really knows this new Bella quite well.

This chapter may have been a workhorse, but it was enjoyable nonetheless. I look forward to Edward's return!

Author's Response:

Thank you so much!  re: the Cullens.  I get really tired of the 2-dimensional stereotypes.

And this chapter is sort of a pivotal chapter in terms of things moving on.  Taking off her ring is a Big Deal ... although ironically, as you'll see, a bigger one for *Edward*.  By the time Bella does it, she's really ready.

I think this Edward is so much more IN LOVE with Bella than before.  But as you'll see, keeping his distance has been for HIS needs as much as hers.  The next chapter is, I hope, really crucial for Edward.

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