im so happy you decided to use Seth instead of Jacob! Seth is such a highly underrated and misused character, i think you've used his sweetness and naivity really well. Hell, id take him home with me!

That was intense!! Awesome!

whoa.

Wow! I found a rec on FF for this story... I'm very interested after reading the first chapter.

Love it

Wow! I love how this Edward has done and seen so much but yet he is just like an innocent, inexperienced boy with Bella. Thanks for drawing it out a little longer. I am loving the suspense!

If that self rightous bitch breaks him and he goes back to using... I'm not reading anymore!  How can she be so goody goody and be expected to have any clue as to his life?  She's going to break him, it's inevitable.

Author's Response:

While you certainly don't have to like my characterization of Bella (I don't like her sometimes either), I'm not really sure what you mean by "goody goody." Yes, she can't understand parts of Edward's life because she's not an alcoholic or a drug addict; but even though his addiction is the major shaping force in his life, he's not solely defined by it. He's a human being with dimensions and while Bella can't understand all of those dimensions, she can understand some of them. If that hasn't come through in these chapters, then that's a failure of the writing, not a failure of the character.

You're clearly using "goody goody" as a pejorative descriptor - which is fine - but you also seem to be using it as a way to describe what Edward is not (Bella is this way and therefore cannot understand Edward because he's another way). The next logical step would be to assume that the non-pejorative would be Edward. And yes, Edward's gained experience, insight, and a kind of understanding because of his drug and alcohol abuse, but I can assure you that the motherfucking shitstorm that is the life of an addict is not worth the insight one gains. Pardon my language.

While I won't quibble with your use of the word bitch (because I do think Bella is a bit of one), what confuses me most is the use of "self-righteous."

Your word choice in this review puzzles me. Regardless, I'm glad that the story elicits a strong reaction. Thanks for taking the time to respond.

interesting story.

they both seem innocent, but both are far from innocent.

This was rec'd by feathersmmmm (Edward Wallbanger) and boy was she right!  This is just unbelievably supuerb!

 

Your writing is so rich and detailed.  Best I have read in a long time, and I read everyday!

 

I am so looking forward to this...

OK, so for, Edward isn't into Bella at all.  Maybe she should get a clue.

And, he's rude.  Not even a hello.  So, to hell with Eddie.

Bella needs to take a ride to the rez and meet Jacob Black.

 

Dang. I wanted him to kiss her even though I knew it wasn't going to happen, but that was... I love how it's so awkward and they like each other and it's just... simple. Complicated, but what they say is simple and meaningful and totally... sweet.

I liked the 'trying to get a glance at the guy sitting next to me' Bella was doing. Doesn't everyone do that? ;)

I have to sleep now, but I'm finishing your story tommorrow. I love this. It's amazing.

Oh my god. I'm giggling! That was the sweetest thing I've ever had the pleasure of reading.

I love this story. It's absolutely brilliant.