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Reviewer: Jodie Ryan (Signed) · Date: May 25, 2010 11:28 PM · On: Motherhood
I am up to Chapter 5 and really enjoying your story. Really loved the Cullens reaction to the Banana smoothie. Very entertaining! Great work! love reading this
Reviewer: kycee (Signed) · Date: May 23, 2010 07:41 PM · On: Unbound
Still loving the story. Will be sad to see it end. Feel free to write as much as you want. I would love Edwards perspective on the volturi encounter. But that goes without saying since I love Edward's perspective on anything.
Reviewer: smartin47 (Signed) · Date: May 23, 2010 10:42 AM · On: Unbound
GO ALL THE WAY WITH IT!! THIS IS GREAT!! I love how you put action to the scene with Bella getting upset and attacking Jacob and Seth getting in the way!! That should soooo be in the movie Breaking Dawn!!!
Reviewer: moonstruck (Signed) · Date: May 23, 2010 12:37 AM · On: Unbound
As always I love every word you write. The interest and emotion portrayed is remarkable writing, the fade to black at the end was beautiful, lemons were unnecessary. And yes an extended epilogue with the Volturi would be a perfect ending. Thank you for this story.
Also I can't help thinking that your version of the first book in Breaking Dawn would be very much enjoyed and appreciated by all. Your writing of Edward's thoughts and emotions through that period could only be perfect.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!! I have actually definitely considered going back and writing the beginning of BD that I originally skipped!
Reviewer: Bart (Signed) · Date: May 22, 2010 04:51 PM · On: Unbound
Beautiful!
Author's Response: Thank you!
Reviewer: dinotopian (Signed) · Date: May 22, 2010 10:12 AM · On: Unbound
Thank you. I have enjoyhed reading this soooooo much in the ePOV.
Author's Response: I'm so glad you like it!!
Reviewer: vampluvr88 (Signed) · Date: May 21, 2010 03:15 PM · On: Unbound
I like the fact that you've taken the time to elaborate on what is a largely ignored part of the plot. Just have a feeling editing ran amok and just let the readers mind fill in the gaps. Sometimes the imagination needs a little help ... thx.
Love your line ..." Then, I lowered myself down, and knew only her.". Succinct, sweet and one that I am happy to let my imagination run riot on ... : )
Author's Response: Oh, thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked the last line!!
Reviewer: M Logan (Signed) · Date: May 20, 2010 08:10 PM · On: Instinctive
Love this chapter. It is great to get into Edward's mind during this part in the story. We also got to 'hear' the family's thoughts. I cannot wait to read the next chapter. Kudos!
Reviewer: Debra Fox (Signed) · Date: May 20, 2010 03:49 PM · On: Unbound
I have always enjoyed this part of the book. I love how Bella goes after Jacob when she finds out he imprinted on "her" baby. You did a wonderful job on the romantic parts. As always, I love your writing style and how you portray Edward's thoughts. Great job.
Author's Response: Thank you!!
Reviewer: chihiro (Signed) · Date: May 20, 2010 05:19 AM · On: Unbound
please please please do try to write the whole Volturi Confrontation. i really love your story.
Author's Response: I think I"m going to do it - although it will be a big job, there's so much going on!!
Reviewer: Wilynn (Signed) · Date: May 19, 2010 04:35 PM · On: Unbound
Great chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you!
Reviewer: depper57 (Signed) · Date: May 19, 2010 03:06 PM · On: Unbound
Absolutely perfect! I always love seeing into Edwards head, to me his story has always been the most intriguing and we can learn so much more through his mindreading. It is like hearing the story through everyones POV. You also stuck true to canon and I love that!
This is my first comment for this story, as I was too preoccupied with reading to type anything, so I do apologize for that! Looking forward to more!!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review!! I'm so glad you like the story :)
Reviewer: writz (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 09:04 PM · On: Unbound
I commend your integrity to Meyer for fading to black. Don't get me wrong, I like a good lemon;), but this felt like it was true to the work. I little more pure, maybe. Again, thanks for writing. Looking forward to your next 2 chapters!
Author's Response: Thank you - I'm so glad you liked it. Very hard to write that stuff w/o falling into "lemon" territory :)
Reviewer: roxnroll (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 05:44 PM · On: Unbound
I loved the fade to black at the end. Sometimes, the lemons take away from the beauty of the story. I think that a lemon would've done that here.
I look forward to the next chapter. Wonderful job.
Rox
Author's Response: Thanks so much!!
Reviewer: diamondtopaz (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 03:53 PM · On: Unbound
Keep up the great work!
Please update soon!
Author's Response: Thank you!!
Reviewer: momof4luvntwisaga (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 02:37 PM · On: Unbound
Great job as always! I like the fade to black- in this fic;}, it fits perfectly! I hate to see this end, because I have loved being in Edward's head. But since it has to end, I think that I would like an extended epi with the details of the Volturi. I really would love to see what goes through Edward's mind when he figures out what Bella had been planning to keep Jake and Ness safe.
Author's Response: Thank you!! That will be a great part of the scene, w/Jake and Ness. Even though I am skipping over several months to go to the Volturi, I think we will still get some insight into what Edward had been thinking during those months, when he reflects, for example, on the fact that what Bella was hiding from him was the plans for Jake and Nessie.
Reviewer: superslug (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 01:04 PM · On: Unbound
A wonderful chapter, like always! I absolutely love this story. It's the best fanfic I've read so far. I think you should defintely do the epilogue with the Volturi conflict! I'm so sad it's coming to an end :-(
Author's Response: Oh, thank you so much!! It is very strange to think the story is getting close to ending - I've been writing it for so long!!
Reviewer: baby_pau (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 12:08 PM · On: Unbound
I love it!!! thanks for the update!!!
Author's Response: Thank you!!
Reviewer: missyninz (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 11:18 AM · On: Unbound
Nice...though I couldn't be more pissed with the ending--it's not bad, but I want more. Haha..
I like it this version of Edward--it's the closest thing to SM's Edward..and it's nice to be true to the source of inspiration. I've read other fanfiction featuring Edward as a rash, needy, pot-mouthed sex addict..and yes, some of them ARE entertaining, but what I love about your writing is that you represent the fictional Edward Cullen we know & love. Sure, lemons are great, but one could always appreciate a clean, solid && fiercely true(to the books) fanfiction piece.
And yes, I think you should add more chapters. Maybe up until the time Edward && Bella argue over her decision to go to Volterra alone.. A chapter or two about the heated argument and a good resolution would be interesting.
Extented epilogue for final confrontation for Volturi would be great too..
Good luck!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review!! Like you, I read a lot of very different Edward's from this one!! But I have really worked so hard to keep this Edward true to the one we all originally (and still do) love :)
Reviewer: RedSummer (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 08:08 AM · On: Motherhood
A very touching moment between Mother and son - you captured Esme's feelings very well here it was quite an emotional piece. x
Reviewer: RedSummer (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 07:31 AM · On: Love
I wonder if Edward had said that he didn't want the baby at all when Bella asked what her reaction would have been? I'm really enjoying this x
Reviewer: RedSummer (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 07:17 AM · On: Resolve
Very interesting start - I'm intrigued to see where this goes x
Reviewer: LJ Summers (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 06:01 AM · On: Unbound
I so appreciate how you meld your narrative to fit the canon story! It's HARD WORK and you do it splendidly.
The mental play during the gift-giving was GREAT. Way cool of Emmett not to vocalize his thoughts in the interests of keeping the secret.
I love your presentation of Edward's quandary of how to read Bella, now? I read a fic somewhere where Edward had to learn Bella's body cues since he didn't have her mind to go by, and that was what he relied upon when he made love to her. That would be SO different, as you've expressed here, without all those visual and audio clues to go by in her new and improved body.
GREAT fade to black. Beautifully, sensually done. Brava!
Author's Response: Thanks so, so much!! These chapters, which follow straight from SM's chapters, are often harder to write than the one's I create fully myself - I find myself agonizing over each line.
I'm so glad you liked the chapter!
Reviewer: Rimlis (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 04:56 AM · On: Unbound
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, you write so beautifully. Please keep writing for as long as you want to. We, your enthralled readers, want you to keep writing so much. Please, please remember to include many more of your tasteful tender moments of Edward and Bella such as at the beginning of this chapter (gorgeous, just enough to tease and satisfy) and at the end (at last) as we have been waiting for so long for Edward to have his immortal Bella and experience the joy, happiness, pleasure, release and satisfaction of loving her in his own way. We don't need all the technical details, (you can write quite beautifully), just the comfort and release of Edward's tenderness and love after the heartache and stress of the pregnancy and the transformation. Please, it will be a balm to our own tortured souls, if you let us read of his desire and love for Bella. Thank you again for your beautiful writing.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!! I am definitely planning some more private moments for Bella and Edward (even though we faded to black, the first night in the cottage isn't over yet :) ).
Reviewer: fangrl (Signed) · Date: May 18, 2010 04:49 AM · On: Unbound
Yes, the slow burn fits with original work. Great job.
Author's Response: Thanks!
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