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Reviewer: goose1980 (Signed) · Date: June 17, 2010 08:36 PM · On: Hide and Seek
I love this story. I really love how funny Emmett and Jasper are. Yes, I have alittle crush on them ;)
Reviewer: jenaflower (Signed) · Date: June 17, 2010 12:57 PM · On: Courage
Really enjoying it! UPDATE PLEASE!!! :)
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 17, 2010 06:14 AM · On: Rising to It
Great chapter. Poor Bella. As hot as angry Edward is... I'm glad they made up. Can't wait to read more. Why did Jane need Edward to call her? Will Bella get to go to London with Edward?
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 17, 2010 05:20 AM · On: In the Know
Great chapter. Loved the meetings between Seth and Edward, and Angela and Jasper, and the interaction between everyone. So funny. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 17, 2010 01:12 AM · On: Making it Real
Great chapter. Glad Edward and Bella talked. Hope Bella gets to go to London with Edward. Looking forward to Seth meeting Edward. Can't wait!
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 16, 2010 11:46 PM · On: Coming Clean
Oh wow! That was so hot and intense and just wow! Great chapter. Loving this story. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: pommedeterre (Signed) · Date: June 16, 2010 08:22 PM · On: Ugly Duckling
I like the plot of this story a lot so far. If you want some constructive criticism read on, if not feel free to skip, I understand :)
I feel like you could explore Bella and Edwards' emotions a little slower - even though we can generally assume that Bella and Edward will end up together in a fic like this, it seems like all the cards are on the table so quickly. Things are a little too obvious to the reader and the characters.
You have some nice expressions in here, but they are often followed by exclamation points which reduce their effectiveness. It makes Bella seem like a flighty weirdo instead of insightful and charming at times. Likewise, use cliche's sparingly if ever. Those two things, I think, would advance your writing a lot.
Like I said, though, I really like the plot and the course of events. You have a lot of good things to work with.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 16, 2010 05:29 AM · On: Hide and Seek
Love love love love love! Loved all the sweet moments between Edward and Bella but also loved the hot, intense moments. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 16, 2010 04:11 AM · On: Honesty
Oh my God finally! Thank God they finally did it! Loved this chapter. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 16, 2010 02:19 AM · On: Protection
Great chapter. Loved all the Edward/Bella and Edward/Bella/Alice/Emmett interaction. Poor Bella, glad Emmett and Edward got to Bella before James could get too far. Can't wait to read more. Looking forward to the morning conversation.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 15, 2010 07:28 AM · On: Truth
Great chapter. Thank you for the wonderfully amazing image of Edward, in a pool, "mean, moody and wet"! Glad Angela's okay. Loved the family interaction! It was so fun reading it. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 14, 2010 03:43 AM · On: Confessions
Great chapter. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 14, 2010 02:04 AM · On: Mr. Nice Guy
"We big, strong manly types don't talk about girly, pansy, pussy stuff like love." Haha love Jasper and Edward. Glad Edward's finally decided to accept his feelings. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 10:20 PM · On: In Control
Great chapter. Glad Angela's alive, hope she gets better soon. Gotta love Edward, Alice and Jasper. Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 08:49 PM · On: Unlucky for Some
Great chapter. Glad they had lunch together. Alice that sneaky pixie....
How did the fire start? Will Angela be okay? Poor Edward just left there...
Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 08:00 PM · On: Mixed Messages
Great chapter. Glad Bella's not quitting, she made her feelings clear to Jacob and she went to Edward's afterwards. Can't wait to read more :)
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 07:32 PM · On: The Swan
Great chapter. Loved the Jasper/Edward moments. Can't really blame Edward for getting the wrong idea suppose considering Bella danced with Jacob and not him. Hope he doesn't let Bella quit. Thank God Tanya didn't catch up to him in time! Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 05:48 PM · On: A Good Defense is a Good Offense
Great chapter. Oh Edward... can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 05:12 PM · On: Ugly Duckling
Great chapter. Bella can't quit! Stupid Tanya... why can't Edward and Bella just realise the feeling is mutual! Glad you introduced Jasper and Esme though. Alice was so cute!
Reviewer: xxthespecialgirlxx (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 11:04 AM · On: Fate
hehe, "Why is it that your period always makes you hornier? Fucking typical!" you were spot on on this one. lol always and it def. sucks. last chapter was so sweet and romantic, this one was also in that category. you are just awesome with the gushy romantic goo :) Cher - if i could turn back time; amazing song. i love it.
did you know you have the horniest pair of Edward and Bella by far? i've read alot of fanfics and yours are the horniest <3
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 07:53 AM · On: Lip Service
Great chapter. Poor Bella, Edward's just being stupid again. Can't wait to read more. Looking forward to the dinner.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 07:37 AM · On: Drawing Lines
Wow.... that was intense. Damn the cliffie! Can't wait to read more. On a different note, glad Edward's feeling better!
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 07:19 AM · On: First Aid
Great chapter. Love Alice and Edward. Can't wait to read more. Was Jacob asking Bella on a date?!
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 06:47 AM · On: Reality Check!
Great chapter. Glad Bella's fitting in at work a little more. Poor Edward, food poisoning's a bitch! Can't wait to read more.
Reviewer: be_my_escape (Signed) · Date: June 13, 2010 06:25 AM · On: Assumptions
Loved this chapter. I liked when Bella snapped at Edward about the pizza. Glad Edward was nicer at the end. Can't wait to read more.
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