i am glad to finally see edwards point of view and i hope we are moving forward now...

 

EW! forks has double period gym! EW!!! lol they have it at my school too. one hour and twenty minutes, minus however long we can drag out getting changed into gym clothes lol. oh, and I kind of like this world without edward. it's nice :)

 Very interested still to know what Edward did in Alaska. I hope that's coming up soon. 

Edward is definantly a man whore!  When will he learn he loves Bella and just let them two be!  Tanya, AGGGGH, can't stand that woman.  Guess i know why you had Edward's sex partner be her.  LOL

If I understand this right, present Edward wants to get to Forks so bad to end his arrangement with Bella because he thinks he's a fucktard and that she deserves better? I hope he would just man up to his feelings and let her decide. Present Bella seems to be in just as much pain as he is, but she hasn't made her confession either. I know they both love Alice, but so much thet sneak around for five years, forgoing their own happiness makes me sad. I know not all stories turn out for the best, but I really hope these two figure their shit out and make it work. Can't wait to hear Edward's version of the night he found James on top of her and their trist in the woods.

Nice to hear EPOV regarding their relationship (friendship or whatever)  He definitely loves her that's why Tanya doesn't appeal to him.  So would like Edward's opinion on some of the memories of him & Bella that you have shared from BPOV.  I ask you to continue in EPOV to give a full picture of what their relationship entails. 

The "Tawny tan, soulful sepia...Bella," passage was some good writing!  Very impressive.  I'm not going to say I hate Edward or Tanya, or I'm frustrated with Bella, because they are just characters and that would seem sophmoric to criticize the characters instead of commenting on your writing.  I will say I'm intrigued to see where you are taking this relationship, what secret Edward and Alice are hiding, why Edward and Bella don't feel worthy of love, etc.  Basically, I'm holding on to see how you develop your interpretations of these characters.  Really quality writing though!  Love the Camus references...an amazing, existential, realist writer.  Keep going!

Author's Response:

Thank you so much.  I spent a ridiculous amount of time on that tweaking it until I thought it was right.  Still don't know that I was satisfied with it, but I am happy that someone was. 

I hopefully won't let you down as I continue to develope these characters.  *bites nails*  I love Camus.  Glad someone else does.  The parts that I quoted aren't necessarily my fave lines, but they are great parts for delvelping Mersault's character.  My fave lines come during the trial and while he is in jail... and when he shoots the Arab.  'The sun was in my eyes.' (I paraphrased.) WTF? Have you read his essay in defence of The Stranger, The Absurd Man?  Its good to and provides a lot more insight to the book as well as Camus' philosophy.

Thanks again. 

ok they really need to get the crap together. edward this way is really on my nerves. why does he always think that he is not good enough for her and she never opens up to her feelings. Lordy please update soon.

Oh My God! Way too much back story. Get on with the current time. This is annoying.

Just showin the love.

LOVE The Verve Pipe.  That song reminds me of freshman year of HS every time I hear it. 

“It was like the equivalent of the vortex in the dryer that randomly sucks up socks.” Loved that line! I hate sock monsters in the dryer.

So…this Kristen girl he’s got waiting for him? Play on KStew…or just a coincidence? I’m thinkin so b/c then he mentions Ashley!

I love Eds little inner battles between “Badward the legendary cockstar” and “goodward’. Doe-eyed…he’s so far gone it’s a lost cause. I love how he thought his heart skipping a beat at the thought of her name meant something was wrong with it and needed to have it checked out. Oh Eddie…if you only knew! I love his little inner “to do” box too.

“Everything about her invited me in—her voice, her face, her smell-- and then there was the unexplainable energy that buzzed between us.” Perfect twist on a quote….great for a future fan fic award! ;-)

“taken before the flames of knowledge had licked at our skin, burnt through us, before everything changed.” I love this imagery. You can really get how broken they are from what happened.

You did a great job channeling Badward. I REALLY can't wait for more. I loved hearing EPOV, you write him well (crude and all). I always wondered where he scurried off to when Bella showed up the first time. I wonder if we’ll get his POV on the “kitchen encounter.” That’ll be a good one. And to FINALLY know what the hell happened in Alaska! You just like keeping the cat nip dangling!

damn hot.

This chapter was very insightful as to the feelings of both Edward and Bella.  Too bad Edward didn't get to Bella and James sooner to stop the brutality Bella endured.  Also he could have seen that she did start to fight for James' entrance not to occur.  The love between them both is evident in every glance.  Only Bella doesn't realize it.  Oh well it will be great to hear Edward's point of view of the events of the party and to his inner feelings.  Keep up the great work.  Update when you can.