When I read that they were playing Taboo, the first thing that popped into my head was a scene in "Four Christmases" playing this exact game. I personally thought it was hilarious, and in the scene it was also couple vs. couple. I'm liking the story so far!

Well, I was going to say that I loved the drama and excitement of the last 2 chapters, but that was before this fiasco eighth James... I hate him!

OMG! The jig is up!!! LOL!

I think this my favorite chapter so far. Edward is so sweet to Cara... They seem like a little family here....aww...

Really enjoying the story and cannot wait to read more. The bar was a funny start!

Chyla

Where are the green eyed babies?

 :(

you should post on fanfiction net. im really enjoying this story,but i ended here by accident. i dont like the format here so much. i bet you would have more readers over there.

 

great story im frm Edmonton so wish the oilers would win the cup again maybe in the next decade thanks for writing anxiously waiting for the next update on meet me on the midway lovin it too

I was under the impression that Twilighted was a "High-quality" fanfiction site. Your story line is entertaining and holds my attention, and I plan on continuing to read it. However, there are typos and grammatical errors almost every paragraph, and they are beginning to distract from the story. I thought it was a requirement to have chapters betaed?

Examples:

Typos

Soon enough the meeting was over and Edward headed back to the locker room to pack up his stuff. He go down there and didn’t really feel like leaving, the ice was free he could always do a few more drills on his own.

 

I thought that would work better too, but I understand that I am here for work and this is your life, so I don’t ever want you to feel like I am overstepping my bounds because that it not what I want to do.

 

Run-on sentences

He was annoyed that she was on his mind, he didn’t even know her and she was pretty much off limits as she was writing about the family, and that seemed like a conflict of interests of some sort.

Alice said quickly and it was decided, Bella got the feeling people didn’t go against Alice; she may have been tiny, but Alice had spark.

Run-on AND improper use of comma

The five made up the first line and Jasper was the starting goaltender, they had a good chance of getting the cup this year, especially with the addition of Mercer who had two cups under his belt.

 

Improper use of comma

Rosalie said with a smile, she seemed to have warmed up to Bella a bit.

 

I really do like your writing and am enjoying reading it. I just figured I would point out that your story may need to be re-edited.

 

 

 

Author's Response:

Omg lmao!!! Be loud and proud baby!  Masturbation is normal. Maybe that's why mommy is so irritable! Lol

Amazing, but I'm not ready to say goodbye! 

I probably would not have left the bathroom at all.  I would be completely mortified.  ♥ how strong Bella is.

oh holy hell!  poor Bella.