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Reviewer: msdenisetexas (Signed)
May 28, 2009 07:09 AM · On:
I figured it was human.. but am dying to know WHY!!!
May 28, 2009 07:04 AM · On:
Wow.. at the end of this chapter (being the depthless and immature person that I am) if I was Bella, I'd probably say something like:
"Oh that's bs. Like some weak little humans could keep a newborn vampire captive."
But that being said... I am starting to think there might just be a weeensie bit more to the story. Something I haven't picked up on that is so blatantly obvious my automatic ignorance to stories has disabled me from picking up. You see, if I start to guess what will happen, I usually get it right.. and that ruins the whole story for me. So I have learnt that ignorance truely is bliss.
Well anyway, I better get back to my addiction that is Vampire in the Basement so I can see whether Edward decides to spill his metophorical guts to Bella. *Olivia crosses her fingers (and become alarmed when they make a cracking noise)*
Reviewer: Sciencemom (Signed)
May 28, 2009 03:26 AM · On:
Yay, Edward! I'll admit I was confused by about the third chapter wondering where Edward was while Bella was getting all infatuated with this vampire in the basement, and calling him "her vampire". I knew he would not stand for her behavior. I had to go back and read the character list because I thought I had seen his name. Then the lightbulb went on...
I just started reading this story yesterday and I am loving it! I can't wait to see what happens between Bella and Edward!
Reviewer: Kittyinaz (Signed)
May 27, 2009 11:50 PM · On:
Love it. I admit I didn't want to read it but a couple of the stories I read praised it so I decided to read it. And now you are on my favorites list for me to b updated when you post new chapters.
Reviewer: Katastrophe (Signed)
May 27, 2009 11:30 PM · On:
Well, I figured after he said "Not them<" as in not vampires that it would be humans. Either that or he had been abducted by aliens. LOL
Wonderful story. I am very much looking forward to the next installment!
Reviewer: Cullenitis (Signed)
May 27, 2009 11:12 PM · On:
Oh,'Chelle-baby! I'm so sorry it took me so long to get this to you! Here you are, giving me the VIP treatment, and I let you down. *hangs head*
You can spank me now. Well....you can spank me whenever...but you know what I mean. ;P WARNING: I make no guarantees not to enjoy it.
I am soooo so happy that Edward is getting about more, as well as interacting with the Cullens more! Your pacing with this story is achingly consistent, and oh so perfect. And I'm glad that his captors' species has now been confirmed.....I figured it was humans, as my Evil William Stryker conspiracy goes, LOL :D
I would SERIOUSLY LUURRRRVE to know what was swimming through Edward's head as he saw Alice's thoughts about Bella being 'in love' with him, and THANK YOU THANK YOU for not forgetting to detail his perplexion at hearing other's thoughts, ESPECIALLY Alice's.
It was so very cool to read about Alice struggling with her thoughts around Edward and how she kind of totally fudged it. It was a rare treat, since generally we read her in total control on that front.
As always, my heart breaks wide open for your Edward, and listening to his clear admission to Bella that it is just 'too much, too soon' for him to try to remember more about his captors just dug the crack in my heart a little deeper. You make me want to be Bella, so I can huggle and snomfort him.
My love and admiration for your craftiness knows no bounds. I am going to forego my usual quad-reviewage for this chapter, just because I am dead tired, but I love you no less!
I still plan to marry you. Just sayin.
Your ever-faithful fiance,
PS: Was it not Christmas in May today with our first Shirtless Robward experience?!?! (Unless you saw Little Ashes....but that doesn't count cuz he wasn't freaking BUFF!) Good GOT DAYUM! I was completely fucking useless today, swimming in a puddle of my own Rob induced drool.
Oh, jo. You were the worst previewer EVER on this chapter :) I still love you though, how could I not?
So many people STTTTTILLLLLLLLLLLL say werewolves. Next A/N, bb, next a/n I'm just gonna be like "HEY -- ITS HUMANS!" Hahahaahaha. Ahh, I love people who are attached to their theories.
I figured that the Cullens would need to get used to controlling their thoughts around him, so yanno, of course Alice would slip up! They're not used to having a mind reader around, i imagine it'll take some time for them to get comfortable in their own thoughts, yadda yadda yadda.
I forgive you for your lack of quad reviews, since I didn't respond to them last time like the failship I am. SIGH.
AND HALE THE EFF YES @ THE NEARLY NEKKID PICS. *faints*
Reviewer: msKuhlena (Signed)
May 27, 2009 10:42 PM · On:
ok this made me cry, i am not sure if they are happy tears, or tears of relief but oh my gosh. I will review more in depth when I reach the end of all that has been written thus far.
Reviewer: nanny (Signed)
May 27, 2009 10:41 PM · On:
loved it loved it !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reviewer: CleanEco (Signed)
May 27, 2009 10:38 PM · On:
I'm happy to see Edward making so much progress! I kind of already felt that it was humans that held him from previous hints you gave. What I can't wait to find out now it how. I'm also looking forward to seeing what happens when the Voltuti show up and how they react to Bella if they find out about her. Looking forward to your next update!
Reviewer: crystaldreams (Signed)
May 27, 2009 09:13 PM · On:
I really love this story. Not sure if I say that every time, but it needs to be said! I can't wait until I find out what happened to Edward. I loved the fact that he came out of the bedroom and stayed for her party! It shows progress and I hope he opens up some more!
Loved this chapter! Thanks!
Reviewer: darkfuture (Signed)
May 27, 2009 09:12 PM · On:
This is an amazing story, original and very well-written. Well-paced, also -- I'm glad you are taking the time to let the characters develop naturally. It would make no sense at all for someone to be tortured for 90 years and then recover overnight. It will be interesting to find out how Edward ended up in the woods - my theory is body-dump since he was in no shape to have escaped. Keep up the good work!
Reviewer: TeamJasper13 (Signed)
May 27, 2009 08:43 PM · On:
Still my favorite story ever! Gah, I totally love this story too much.
It was half cute/half sad that Edawrd is rubbing off on Bella so much. Cute because it kinda made me smile at her paranoid "they're out there" thoughts, sad because it's true and because she and Edward both realize that.
And after this nice little beginning we get some Alice pov! :D It was interesting to have it confirmed that Alice sees 18 as being Bella's last birthday as a human. I was really giggling out loud when she thought about chanting "I come in peace" in her mind as she approached Edward. Hehe, I could totally see Emmett actually doing that....except saying it both outloud and in his head with accompanying hand gestures.
I loved Alice's thoughts about approaching Edward being intense and wondering how Bella did it all the time and then realizing that Bella knew Edward wouldn't hurt her and thinking about Bella being in love with him. What I wouldn't give to know what was running through Edward's head at that time as he stared intently at Alice.
It was also just tooo cute when Alice realized she had given Bella away and got all flustered trying to control her thoughts. Alice flustered is definitely an unusual situation and it was very nicely done. I loved that she didn't back down from questioning him, even with difficult questions, and her method of looking in the future for his answers was great. LOLing again at her thought of her fingers as piranhas.
I was so proud of Edward following Alice downstairs....and of course we later find out that he did it all for Bella of course, which makes it even sweeter. And Alice was great communicating with him and looking to Bella's examples to help him and giving him his blanket. I do have to admit to a certain flare of panic when I read that Alice was placing rose petals in crystal bowls. I was just thinking "Oh please don't let anything horrific happen at Bella's last birthday party!" I was quite pleased when it turned out to be such a wonderful party with no mishaps!
After all that Alice had explained about the Volturi and Edward knowing that they are coming in four weeks to interrogate him (which I'm insanely happy that Carlisle was able to gain them a little bit more time before that vist!) his only thought was making sure Bella would be safe. He even spoke aloud and voluntarily to Alice to make sure that Bella would be okay. It's so clear that he's in love with her as well...and I'm just melting all over about it! :P
I definitely do see a potential for a big Bella related problem when the Volturi visit though....other than just if she shows up or demands to be there for Edward and her nicely scented blood tempting the non-vegetarian vamps. Because even if they keep her away physically from the Volturi, then how will they block Aro from knowing about her with his little talent. I'm wondering if that will open a whole new can of worms or if Alice's vision will be enough to pacify him as it was in NM and if Aro reads Edwards mind, what kind of revelations will that bring? And do the Cullens know about Aro's power or will that be a nasty surprise for them? Potential for soooo many exciting (possibly scary) things with the Volturi visit!
I absolutely loved Emmett's casual entrance...flopping down beside Edward, pretending (I think) not to see him, "Oh hey dude", and trying for a fist pound. So classically Emmett and soo giggle-worthy, as was Emmett turning on ESPN and that and his comment making Edward confused. And Edward didn't run! Still so proud of him and so convinced of how much he loves Bella.
Especially convinced of this last part (as well as Bella being in love with him) by their moment at her birthday party. The beginning of the second Bella pov part was nice and I liked her commentary on Alice's preparations and the unnecessariness of them, but her noticing Edward there, walking toward him (and everyone else fading away), and their hug, and him telling her Happy Birthday....that totally eclipsed all the other stuff to win as the coolest, greatest moment of this chapter.
It was so sweet of the Cullens to vacate the room so they could enjoy their moment in private....although they all probably did that as much for their benefit as for Bella and Edward's since it did have the feeling of a very private type moment to it. I can imagine most of the Cullens feeling voyeuristic witnessing this exchange (other than Emmett and they'd have to drag him out cause he probably wouldn't care, lol.) Alice peeking around the corner covertly was extremely cute!
Liked that the presents were mostly the same. Wondering why Edward focused on Carlisle during the party....if there was a significane to that or not.
The last part was magnficent. After seeing Edward around the family and seeing him once he and Bella are alone again, you can see how far he was come in his interactions with her. I was gushing as they held hands at the window, and at him telling her he wanted to be there for her party. Loved his chuckle about Alice. He likes Alice....yay!
It was definitely nice getting a tad bit more info about his captors and confirming they were humans, which I was actually right about so yay for that. Of course though, I was only right because I wasn't smart enough to guess any other group to have captured him, but oh well, lol.
It was Bella's best birthday ever and the best Bella birthday scene ever written.....miles better than SM's version of Bella's 18th b-day, lol. I think you know by now just how much I adore the story, so I won't waste time typing it again. Oh yes, I will. I love, love, love, love, love every chapter that you post and this one was no different. And as always, I'm left excited and eager for more VitB!
I will preface this response by telling you how much I adore your reviews! They're so intense, I LOVE reading them! You give me so much to think about when it comes time to respond :)
It is very sad that Bella has come to be as paranoid as Edward. Because really, when it comes down to it, there's a very real and inherent danger in the fact that they're out there... Whether the Cullens can take them on or not -- to live in fear that they'll come back can't be pleasant!
It's so funny that you mention the 'I come in peace' line. It was one that I thought for sure would get edited out, and I was surprised and pleased that my beta did not lay down the law. Emmett would've been saying it out loud, so true! But we'll get to Emmett, LOL!
I think, in any fic where the Cullens just pick up Edward and haven't been around him, controlling their thoughts needs to be addressed. We didn't get any of it in the books because really, Bella was the only character who knew they were vamps and knew Edward could read minds, and he couldn't read hers. The cullens had already dealt with learning to be around Edward. Here, they need to come to grips with the fact that none of their thoughts are their own anymore, you know?
And -- EVERYONE expected a mishap here, so clearly there couldn't be one! Am I one to do what people expect? Based n the reviews, it doesn't seem like it, haha! When everyone expects tragedy, I gotta make good things happen, and maybe vice versa? we'll see :P
And very good point about the volturi coming! People are suggesting that they just keep her away -- but surely if Aro is coming it's not so simple :) The Cullens do know about Aro's power -- as Carlisle was still with them in his early days.. if that helps at all!
Again, thank you SO much for reviewing hon! I love seeing what you have to say, even if my responses fail :)
Reviewer: siouxchef (Signed)
May 27, 2009 08:07 PM · On:
I was so excited to see your update today! I'm glad Edward is coming out of his shell, but I'm fearful of his reaction to knowing how Bella feels about him. His story is still in the dark somewhat, I'm anxious to see what that is all about. I'm glad your version of the birthday party was much nicer than the book ;).
Thank you again for another fantastic chapter.
Reviewer: Pire (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:54 PM · On:
Oh yeah, a side note:
Emmett was hilarious in this chapter! haha
Reviewer: Pire (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:51 PM · On:
Surprisingly, I really loved Alice's POV in this chapter (17). I'm usually not too fond of Alice's mind in most fan fics, but you do it so well and you don't make her out to be some maniac who only has one thing on her mind.
You made her seem quite well-rounded with only a slight obsession with all things glamorous ;)
Though, thinking back, I know you did Alice's POV once (or twice) before and I loved it then, too. This time just really stuck to me.
I'm also curious as to what Edward is thinking when Alice thought about Bella being in love with him. I think that had something to do with his reaction to her when she arrived at the house. *ponders*
Another great chapter!
Reviewer: msqt76us (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:34 PM · On:
Absolutely LOVE the chapter! But, I'm a little confused with the timing... Not that you have to stay true to the SM timeline, but isn't Bella's birthday in September? So, would this be September of her Senior year? If so, she missed prom... ?
Again, not that you have to follow the SM timeline, but many people reading this will expect that unless you specify.
It's following the timeline. She missed homecoming -- which falls in the early fall for most schools. It might've been a little earlier in Forks, but homecoming was always in sept/early oct in my school so I thought it was acceptable.
Prom falls in the spring, her senior prom will be coming up in about 6 months.
It more less follows SM's timeline.
Reviewer: katydid (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:20 PM · On:
I think you hinted to it being humans early on, but it was done nicely with Edward telling Bella.
I loved the way Alice tried to get the mind reading thing down. I bet Edward got a large glimpse during his day with Alice...aside from the fact that Bella loves him.
Thanks for the update-Kate
Reviewer: amybo15 (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:10 PM · On:
Great story...totally different from any fanfic I've read. A question though: How in the world did Carlisle stall Aro? I wonder what he told them? Also, is Edward seeing Alice's visions? Looking forward to more chapters!
Reviewer: misslippy (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:08 PM · On:
After several angry tirades from my big sister, Jillburfm, I am here to finally review your incredible story! I always give her my reviews and I should have tape recorded them because they were quite frankly, brilliant. But here I am...
First of all, what a creative, fascinating, and thought provoking premise! Edward is the weak one?! Interesting. I've enjoyed watching--and I mean watching because your writing gives the reader a picture, very descriptive--the comfort zone of Edward expand around Bella. I do enjoy the absolutely unexplainable, but inextricable draw between the two of them. I love stories where Carlisle doesn't have all the answers and where Alice needs to keep guessing and where Jasper's talent isn't failproof and where Rosalie shows her maternal side and where Emmett is so joyously nonchalant... specifically in this chapter. You give them all such simple human qualitites and it's refreshing.
So... this chapter. From the ever foreboding nightmare of Bella's to the need for everyone to hunt--I was positive a simple paper cut would unleash the true monster in Edward a la New Moon. Not Jasper, but Edward. Way to be tricky. Every little detail pointed to it, but nope! You remain unpredictable. I mentioned that to Jillbur and she commented on how you like to go canon-opposite. Kinda like Edward being the weak, fragile, soap bubble? Lovely. Kinda like Alice and Edward having their first "gifted" conversation instead of their 800 millionth? Lovely. Kinda like the exact same birthday presents, but different? Lovely.
My favorite moment, and I doubt I'm alone her, was when Alice thinks, "Leave it to Bella to fall in love with a vampire" and Edward stops dead in his tracks. Awesome. Way to cover, Alice. *snorts* When Bella asks Edward what he and Alice talked about, I thought he might crack a smile, but alas, he was worrying about the humans...
I also am incredibly intrigued by Alice mentioning the vision of Vampire Bella when Bella first moved to Forks.... because of James? Something tells me no way. Are the mysteriously revealed "humans" a part of that decision? Are they related somehow to Bella?
So here you are... my somewhat monster of a review. I apologize for not reviewing earlier. I don't like writing "another great chapter, update soon" so I usually try writing a brief novella; therefore, I tend to not write at all. But I will start!!
Jesus, it's about time! She asks me all the time if you've reviewed yet :) I'll be happy to be able to tell her you have! :D
I do like to draw parallels from canon, and they're all over the place! Butttt EVERYONE was expecting a mishap, and surely I can't do what everyone expects! I'm not sure how the family would've reacted to Edward going all vamp on Bella and trying to eat her -- if Carlisle would lose all the faith he's built in Edward, etc.. ugh, wouldn't have been great for Bellas cause :)
And Alice outted Bella! What a jerk she is :P I wanted to make sure they dealt with learning to control themselves around all the powers. In the books, there was a lot of talk about no privacy, about having to constantly control your thoughts around Edward, etc... and I think it would take a lot of work to learn to screen your thoughts in his presence, so I wanted to make sure we got that aspect of the development of Edward and the Cullens here.. if that makes sense.
I'm so glad you decided to leave a review! Because I read them ALL and love them ALL! Thanks so much hon :)
Reviewer: TRACY6315 (Signed)
May 27, 2009 07:04 PM · On:
LOVE IT!!!! MORE PLEASE!!!
Reviewer: WiththeMurf (Signed)
May 27, 2009 06:58 PM · On:
I love Emmett! Had to put that out there. :)
I suspected humans. I am totally intrigued by that and where it's taking the story.
Edward joining Alice downstairs was so sweet. I love it. Big smile over here. Oh, and, I'm happy there were no party mishaps! I kept anticipating it.
As always, loving it <3 Keep up the terrific work, lady!
Reviewer: drkvctry (Signed)
May 27, 2009 06:37 PM · On:
i thought we knew it was humans that did it from a few chapters back..
or was i just foreshadowing? lol
i dont thin i can tell you how much i love this story! I was heading to bed when this update came up and i went tearing around the room "whooping"
embarrassing..yes..but i couldnt help it
Reviewer: anabanana219 (Signed)
May 27, 2009 06:28 PM · On:
I'm a little confused about HOW it could be humans, but I loved it none the less! I can't wait for more!! I love learning new things about Edward!! xx
Reviewer: Jynxx (Signed)
May 27, 2009 06:17 PM · On:
First, you don't have to respond, I know how busy life is and I'd rather hear more of the story when time permits :-)
This is one of the most moving stories I have read. I find myself crying right along with Bella at Edward's fear. The poor fella doesn't even realize that she's his singer yet but it's obvious with the way he's always swallowing the venom around her. Of course, with his body's natural reaction to blood, it's probably pretty safe for her.
As for how this could happen, I could see it if he was given odd drugs as a newborn, and kept starved, 90 years is more than long enough to condition responses, and if Edward didn't know what he was, he would have no way of knowing what his capabilities should even be. The mind reading alone would be terrifying for him.
I hope the Volturi won't be a problem. I know they have their own issues and agendas, but I'd like to think that maybe they are no ALL bad and will give Edward time to heal at the very least.
Of course, the humans captors should all be fed to the Volturi - no creature deserves that kind of life. I am curious how he got into the woods...
Your story is heartfelt and very well written and your plot idea is wonderfully original and engaging. I simply can't wait for the rest of the story.
It's like an unwritten rule that when a review starts with "you don't have to respond" I ALWAYS RESPOND. So here it is:
I'm so glad you're feeling touched by this story. It IS a sensitive topic and I hope to be relaying his recovery with proper care, because I wouldn't want to botch something so significant. It means a lot that you're enjoying it so far.
And yes -- the mind reading! We haven't gotten a chance to explore his take on it, but it's entirely possible that he had no idea what it was until they told him he could read minds! Hopefully soon I'll be able to get into that, we'll see!
The volturi... well, I can't tell you too much about that, because.. it's a plot point! But we all know there's angst a'brewin, and it isn't all revolving around their visit... eeeee.
How he got into the woods is an excellent question, and I LOVE when people think back to chapter one and question how he got there. It's one of the most interesting things to read in reviews, knowing that people are thinking constantly! I love to see people looking deeper than what's outwardly said!
Thank you so much for reviewing hon! I'm so glad you're still with it! :)
Reviewer: keerplunk2809 (Signed)
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May 27, 2009 06:14 PM · On:
YAY!!! now everybody knows!!
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