WOW! You are a phenomenal writer. You have a way with words that is unbelieveable. However, you have not updated in a while and as I have only just stumbled upon your story, I have not had the chance to berate you for not updating. (Sorry about that. :) ) The angst is killing me as well as the need for more. Please update soon!!!!

i kind of think this is the way the series should have gone! bella is more believable- she has real emotions and isn't quick to forgive. bravo!

gah. i'll have to take 2 anti-depressants after a day of reading this. there should be a warning at the beginning. "dont read if you are already, in anyway, even slightly depressed."

whooosh.

i like your story, i really do, that is why i read 31 chapters of it, but honestly it is *brace yourself* more depressing than New Moon.

Well I hope you are happy - I'm sick and supposed to be resting but I discovered your fic tonight and you took me on quite a ride! It is just brilliant.  I'm ready for things to lighten up now, but you did an incredible job. I will be awaiting the next chapter with bated breath.

OK... I started reading this story a few days ago and couln't stop!!! Now I can hardly wait fro an update!!! Please update soon...its a great story. But I do hope Bella and edward actually get together soon!!! I can't take much more angst!!!

Your a great writer!

AAAAAHHHHHH....When are you gonna update?

Hope you do soon. This story was def one of my faves & I even voted for it on The Eddie awards. Don't stay on hiatus too long :)

Hey Oxy, I can't wait until you update, it has been over 2 months, I hope you make the chapter extra long, I don't mind, and you should sent(once you are done) a copy of your fanfic to Rob and to Kristen I am sure they would just love it

Your work really went home her, until this chapter. What the ...? Why has Edward turned into a stalker? "tell me to leave?" Even if he feels that he needs her and there is no"better option" for her, why pester her like that, especially when she is recovering from an attack, both physical and emotional.  Your version makes him seem like a sullen kid in a candy store - now I want the candy, now I don't, and God help you if you don't oblige. Angst nonwithstanding, this is an emotional depth of a teaspoon. And what about Bella's free will? She has a right to be taken seriously, she has fought for it during her 3 month's post breakup recovery, and has already taken major decisions that witness her thoughtfullness and maturity (breakup with Jake). It is not fair to corner her like that. If Edward wants her back, he has to earn the right, not bully it out of an exausted, sick girl. And Jake being the potencial stalker is no argument here - Edward could protect her from a distance. I'm sorry if you feel I am  being harsh her, but it is only because this chapter is such a contrast to your previous style. Love your work, by the way.

Author's Response:

Wow.  A half-star rating.  “The emotional range of a teaspoon.” So I’m guessing you really hated this chapter, then? 

 

I’m flattered that you actually read through all 31 chapters of my story, so I don’t want to be too argumentative here, but I would like to answer the concerns you had in your review.  So if this gets a bit lengthy, sorry (what can I say, I’m verbose).  Anyway…

 

Neither Bella nor Edward are flawless characters.  If they always made logical, mature decisions, I would find it highly unbelievable given the fact that Bella is an 18-year-old girl still working on becoming an adult and Edward is a stubborn, self-loathing, century-old vampire who has virtually no experience with romantic love and the vulnerability that accompanies it.   Both Edward and Bella acted in ways that made them unlikeable in this chapter.  But I don’t think that gives my characterization of them the “emotional range of a teaspoon.”  I do agree with you that Edward acts like a “sullen kid in a candy store.”  Emotionally, he’s very inexperienced with love and how to pursue the first woman he’s ever had romantic feelings for.  He acted in one extreme by pushing her away in Chapter 25 to protect her, and in this chapter, he does a complete 180 by coming on way too strong.  He’s a man of extremes, both in canon and in IVO.  He also wants to undo the past, in a way, and he forces his way back into her life b/c he is too inexperienced and headstrong to realize that she needs more space.  He overreacted when he learned of Jacob’s attack on Bella, mostly because he blames himself for inadvertently putting her in harm’s way.  His behavior was a knee-jerk reaction to the panic he felt over Bella’s endangerment.  Was it the right way to go about it?  No way.  However, I don’t think it was entirely unrealistic for him to act that way given (1) the stubbornness of his character, (2) his panic over Bella’s safety (remember how he initially overreacted in Eclipse to her even spending time with Jake?), and (3) his complete inexperience with romantic relationships.  He was an idiot, in many ways, but I don’t think this was out of place with how I characterized him in the rest of the story.  He’s far from perfect, and I hate stories where Edward can do no wrong.  I opted to show his flaws as well as Bella’s b/c both of them have plenty of shortcomings I find fascinating to write about. 

 

As for Bella, you’re absolutely right:  she does have a right to space, especially after everything’s she’s endured.  And again, Edward pushed all this on her very abruptly where he should have eased her in slowly.  The argument can also be made that Edward needed to come clean with her as soon as possible, and that she wouldn’t hear him out unless he confronted her like he did.

 

Also, this chapter is a bit of a departure from the previous chapters, but I intended it to be.  Edward finally coming clean about his feelings is a huge turning point for the story.  Further, Bella is in a state of denial (both about the attack on her back and her relationship with Edward), so writing this from her POV was quite challenging. 

 

I hope it’s cool that I’ve been babbling on forever and that I haven’t completely offended you; that’s no my intention.  Actually, I find your review interesting b/c most people who have had reservations about the chapter have taken issue with Bella (finding her too resistant to Edward and too bitter) and let Edward off the hook.  You’re the first one to say Edward was completely out of line.  Like I said above, I completely agree with you, but I do think Edward’s behavior fits in with his hot-cold treatment of Bella throughout the story (e.g.,“stay away from me,” then “let’s be friends,” and then “I don’t love you; stay away from me”) as well as his stubbornness.  If you’d like to debate this further, please hop over to the IVO thread on the Twilighted forums.  We’ve been off-topic over there for weeks, and I would love to discuss something IVO-related again.   

Actually, I'm glad you wrote this chapter. I didn't read the other reviews, but I hope they left the pitchforks in the shed where they belong. I absolutely hated New Moon for having Edward in only 10% of the book. I thought the 6 months were brilliant though -- especially when SM just had the month names as the chapters. What a great way to show the utter blankness? that Bella felt during that time. But... this is a fanfic afterall. You can give us the desperation without putting us through almost an entire novel of Bella and Jacob. (Okay, okay ... it's obvious I'm Team Edward.) But in all honesty, I am really liking the way you are letting this story unfold. You write extremely well, and are really good at putting your own style and voice to the characters without actually making them OOC. Brilliant!

Okay -- I love in the A/N where you say intelligent reviews make your day. I promise, I'm usually much more articulate, but I am leaving reviews quickly so I can hurry to the next (already) posted chapter. Besides, I'm not even sure you will go back and read these :) With all of that said, another great chapter! I am actually enjoying this story much more than I expected to! This is by far my favorite fanfic (at least, up until this point.) And I've read quite a few over the last couple of months!

Author's Response:

Well, I'm reading it now, so there!  You probably don't even remember leaving this, but I wanted to say thank you anyway! 

Okay... "my after-school MD program is only in its first semester"-- favorite line in this chapter. I couldn't stop giggling at that.. and I'm a grown woman!

I love the rambling mess! I just started reading this story, so forgive me for reviewing so late in the game. I absolutely loved this chapter! Very well-written! I must say, I completely identify with Bella here -- you had me laughing out loud at the dialogue between her and Edward! Bravo! Can't wait to keep reading!

This is my first time actually submitting a review for your story, but I'm enjoying it so much, I just had to tell you. So many stories are all love, joy, and romance. It's nice, but boring. I love stories with angst, drama, and conflict. That is why I LOVE your story. You make things difficult, complicated and messy. That's how life is and that's what makes things interesting. As a reader, I completely appreciate every minute of this. I get the sense that some readers just want to get Jacob out of the way quickly to move to the "happily ever after" with Edward. I'm team Switzerland...I like them both. More importantly though, I feel that the soul of the story is in the fact that there is a conflict. That she has feelings (though different) for both men. Thank you for not just throwing Jake under a bus to get rid of the "conflict" quick and easy.

p.s. - I love the Notting Hill reference (one of my favorite movies), and the "Steak 'n' Shake" reference (my parents live in Quincy, IL, and Steak 'n' Shake is a favorite). I get you girl!