Nice

Author's Response:

Thanks

So this is the infamous "No Edward, I'm drunk" part. I've been wondering when it came up.  I rather like this interpretation a lot (if not more than the original).  It adds more realism to the impossibily unrealistivc story. Great chapter!

Author's Response:

I didn't know that line was "infamous," but I'll take that label anyway. ;)  Teenage drinking in a small town is hard to avoid, so I thought it was pretty realistic.  Glad you did, too.

I LOVE YOU. Thank you so much for updating...this was an excellent chapter. I know you said it was difficult to write, but you seriously pulled it off. And brilliantly, at that.

 

Bella's characterization/emotions are excellently written... :)

 

Please update soooon!

Please?

I can't wait to read about their detentions...and the WTF moment?!

Author's Response:

I'm working on the update.  And still loving your username, btw ;)

i know i know, im ages late on becoming obsessed with this story, but surely enough i have. and i havent even made my way through this entire chapter, but something caught me and i absolutely had to let you know.

 

"

“Sorry about all of this.  Our brother, he’s a bit difficult.”

 

With his hulking frame and impossibly loud voice, Emmett should have scared me to death or at least intimidated me into silence, but I was more entertained by him than anything else.  “Oh, don’t worry, I know that already.”  I smirked back at him, impressed with my own confidence. 

 

He studied me for a moment before retorting with a grin, “I bet you do.” 

"

 

THIS. I literally giggled. then stopped. because i had to adjust to the thought that i, a 24 year old woman, in her own house, in FACT was giggling at the thought of a retail run in with the cullen clan. holy hell, my dear... well done. you, and your writing, are exquisite.

 

it's gonna be an allll nighter.

 

<3

sarah

Author's Response:

i love Emmett, too.  Writing him is second nature to me, and I hope to include more of him in a future chapter or two. 

Whoa. Sam's change sounds so much worse than how I interpreted from the books. I don't know why, but it does.  Great work!

LOVE how this is going (and how long this chapter is!!!)By the way...Bella would NOT have an umbrella.  I live on San Juan Island, WA (where we're mostly grey and light drizzling rain rather than Rain Forest rain like on the Olympic Peninsula), but I have to tell you.  We Washingtonians don't use umbrellas.  Call us crazy, or just plain dented, but we wear coats with hoods and just dash through the rain.  Most of us may own umbrellas, but we probably couldn't tell you where they are at any given time.  Just an FYI that I thought you might get a giggle out of! 

Author's Response:

I love your comment about Bella and the umbrella!  Maybe the Phoenix in her is forcing her to carry it around?  Either way, I see your point about being used to the rain.  Here in the Midwest, we're the same way about snow--give us three feet and we still head off to work whereas people further south would cower and hide over a few measley inches ;) 

i loooveee your story!

first of all your plot is amzing and so is your writing.

like this is the only story i've ever read where i've actaully wanted to print it out so i can read it anytime i want, and keep it forever. udate soon!!! pleaseee!! i can't get enough!

Author's Response:

Don't print it out yet; I have to do a hardcore read through to fix all my typos ;)  But thank you for the props.

Wow!  The mom talk about Jacob and safe choices vs taking the risk for one that is really fulfilling--is soooo right on!!!  I made the Jacob/Charlie choice myself; your words are so very true!  It was one of the two things I found wanting in SM's series: that the more "real" guy is the one that you should settle for and that Edward is so emotionally unavailable.  Girls/Women are attrated to that type all the time--but there's no fixing them.  It's who they will always be.  I guess it's what truely makes Edward a fairy tale--that his love for Bella is such that he chooses to be another way.

More, more!!!

Ahh.  That was so completely worth the wait. 

I have gotta say--I *love* the way you wrote Bella's slow realization about her feelings for Jacob and Edward, her reaction to Edward's rejection, and the following months.  Loved that it was complex and dark and painful and not-pretty.  I acknowledge that I'm probably a little weird for liking the mauling plot twist as much as I did--but again, I love that you took the story there and did it so well.  That said, I had no freaking clue how you were going to bring Bella back from that depth of anger and hurt. 

I should have had more faith.  This chapter was really brilliant.  I think you did an excellent job of capturing the spectrum of hurt that Bella felt after Edward's rejection...all the way from bone-crushing pain of knowing that you can't have your true love to the very human sting of betrayal at having made yourself totally vulnerable and been rewarded with deceit and rejection.  That you managed to realistically start to see past that second type of pain is amazing. 

Also, while I am an admitted angst-glutton, I really enjoyed the ABBA humor.  And "Forks High's red-faced answer to Napoleon"?  Awesome.  :)

I can barely stand the wait for detention.  Thank you so much for this story!!

 

 

 

Author's Response:

You're not weird for liking the mauling, zess.  A surprisingly high amount of reviewers were also into it.  Also, love that you appreciated the transition in Bella's anger in this chapter.  It wasn't easy or fun (to write or, probably, to read), but it had to be done slowly.  Thanks for understanding.

Getty pretty good!  I'm really interested in seeing where you go with this and how you resolve the current issues.  Glad I just found it so I'm not stuck salivating for more!  :)

So I've basically spent all day reading your story which may sound a bit pathetic but hey there was a thunderstorm and I really really really love this story. At first I was iffy because I figured it was just a different version of twilight. Which I guess it is but its from another angle and is so different. But its really good. Almost as good as the actual version.

Author's Response:

Thank you!  The first couple of chapters are very similar to Twilight, but I wanted to show how things begin similarly with one small twist of fate (Bella arriving earlier, the Cullens later) can have a huge impact on the overall outcome. 

i was going to go to bed early. a nice, early night with plenty of sleep to celebrate the fact that tomorrow is the only friday all semester that i don't have 6am practice.

so, naturally, it's 3am and i've been up for four hours reading this wonderfully amazing story. i absolutely love every single word to bits and pieces, from the arguments to the author's notes (actually, i love the author's notes way more than i should, because they sound kind of like me). fantastic job, i love the characters to death, i may possibly be more in love with this edward than i am stephanie's edward. and i happen to seriously dislike jacob, so i appreciate your less-than-pleasant treatment of him.

but seriously though. just...everything. the slow deterioration of jacob and bella's relationship was exquisite, and the relationship between alice and bella and how it's not that stereotypical fanfiction POOF bffls. and, of course, the mall madness references.

love it, love it, can't wait for more!

Author's Response:

I can't believe my ranting author's notes amuse you.  We must be kindred spirits :) 

I am not sure I could forgive him either...but love has no easy explanation.  I wonder how she will face his family and what they think about all that is going on.  And when is that first kiss going to happen?  I know...getting a bit ahead of myself, but can't help it because I'm addicted to your story.  Can't wait for an update!

Author's Response:

The Cullens will show up soon enough.  As for the kiss?  My lips are sealed on when that's going down.  Thanks for reviewing!