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Reviewer: JuliannaOphelia (Signed) · Date: March 16, 2009 03:05 PM · On: Chapter 19

wow, great work:)



Author's Response:

Thank you so much - I appreciate your review.

Mel

Reviewer: Twinklefae (Signed) · Date: March 16, 2009 02:59 PM · On: Chapter 19

It's nice to see Bella's struggles start to resolve... a great chapter.



Author's Response:

I think she's gong to have good days and bad days.  It wont magically resolve itself immediately, but she is most definitely moving in a forward direction, slowly but surely.  THANKS for reviewing.

Mel

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 02:10 PM · On: Chapter 12

Hi

Oh my god, Bella is SOOOOO pregnant. And I have to leave for work. I knew I was going to leave at an important part. Darn.

This was a great chapter. I liked the inclusion of Rose.

Sorry this review can't be better, I don't have time. Thanks for writing,

jmeyer



Author's Response:

Thanks for your reviews - it's been such fun watching them come in, and they've all been great.  Have fun at work!!!  Poor you - where do you work? 

M

 

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 01:53 PM · On: Chapter 11

Hi

It is kind of like we are IMing. God, I haven't done that in forever. I am a fast writer, usually. I usually sit down and spit out a chapter in about four or five hours. Then I let it sit for a while, maybe a day or two, and go through it again. The second go through is when I make the dialog REAL. There are so many stories out there that have unrealistic dialog between characters and it is one of the things I hate to see. Your story has realistic dialog, don't worry. But they'll have lines like.

Alice: Bella you should sit down in that chair next to my brother Edward and I will scoop out some of this hot, fresh, delicious lasagna I cooked for our dinner tonight. And I don't want you to complain about how expensive the wine is.

That isn't real. No one talks like that. I feel like a lot of authors, bad authors (oh I'm horrible), use dialog to do more than it should do. If Alice really cooked hot lasagna for the family, and she wanted Bella to sit next to Edward, that should have been done in a descriptive paragraph - not dialog. I always speak the dialog that is in my story out loud, to make sure it is something that people would actually say.

The description fo Bella's room was beautiful. Makes me jealous. I wish my room looked like that! I wonder, has Edward hunted at all since the attack?

jmeyer



Author's Response:

I use iChat with my mum all the time, and sometimes video or just audio.  VERY handy if you don't live close by your family.  But I use it with some other long distance friends too.  

Yes, I think the reviewing is the longest part of the writing process. I do reviews for some common punctuation/grammatical errors I often make (thanks TwilightZoner - my Twilighted beta), then I review for flow and everything else. And then I'll read certain parts out loud to make sure they sound right.  UGH - takes forever.  But better than just posting your first draft - that would be ghastly!!

Thanks for your review.

Mel

 

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 01:40 PM · On: Chapter 10

Hi,

Oh thank God Bella remembered everything on her own. I was not looking forward to the conversation where Edward would have to not only tell Bella that her mom died at the hands of James, who also caused her injuries, but that her father is dead as well.

I feel like someone is going to question the story the Cullen's have fabricated. Perhaps Jacob and the wolves will question it - thinking the Cullens attacked them, instead of James. And since Edward doesn't think there are wolves or that the Blacks remember their history.

Thanks for writing.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

I didn't want another amnesia story - not that I've read any amnesia stories about Bella, but I just imagine they're out there and I wanted to do something different to that.  

Thanks for reviewing!

M

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 01:26 PM · On: Chapter 9

Hi,

I am a REALLY fast reader. It is a blessing and a curse. I always get to the happily ever after fast, but the enjoyment of reading a wonderful story goes by far too quickly.

I can't believe Bella doesn't remember anything. That is going to make the whole process harder on Edward, and on her. She's going to have to deal with it all over again.

I'm thinking that if Bella had been preganant by James, and you were sticking to the same sort of process as SM did in Breaking Dawn, the Cullen's would know by now. Unless they had been so focused on everything else that they aren't foucsing on anything else. Or maybe you are doing a different sort of pregancy logic, more like an actual human pregnancy. Or maybe Bella isn't pregnant.

Ah, so many questions.

Thank you for writing.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

I'll never tell.... Oh right, I already said that.  

Yeah, you are a CRAZY fast reader.  Are you a fast writer too - I don't mean with pencil in hand or however many words per minute you type. I mean, is your writing process quick, or do you get blocked sometimes, lacking in inspiration, the right words elude you - all those things that can sometimes drag it out?  Or once you start, is it pretty quick to get down on the page?

Thank you for reviewing - I DO try to always say that to every review reply I make, but I feel like we're IMing here and I've been remiss!

M

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 01:17 PM · On: Chapter 8

Hello

HOLY IINTENSE CHAPTER. Once Carlisle started talking about perhaps considering alternate arrangements for Bella, my mind started racing. That certainly would be a dark turn of events, to have her in a long term coma. Would Edward have changed her?

Thank goodness she woke up. I was nervous about the infection too. Did Rosalie and Esme take Renee's body back to Florida to stage her death? I wonder if anyone will question the EXTREME coincidence that is presented in the three deaths.

Thanks for writing,

jmeyer



Author's Response:

Intense is good! Yes, it is an EXTREME coincidence, but hard to avoid in this story.  Would certainly have been easier to explain if Charlie and Renee were still together, alas....

M

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 01:06 PM · On: Chapter 7

Oh, I love this.

Emmett is my favorite. I love that he is Bella's big brother and that they all are just banding around her like a family. She is definitely going to need that once she wakes up and learns that not just her mother is dead, but her father too.

I wonder how soon (or if) Victoria is going to make an appearnace in your story. Edward can't leave Bella, as he did in New Moon, because she doesn't have anyone else. Will Bella ever learn of the wolves? Will Jacob make an appearance at all?

So many questions. So many different directions you could take that. I really think that marks a good story, when the author writes a story that is not just on one predictable path, but that there is this multitude of opportunity they can take with the story.

Thanks for writing. I usually write that at the end of each review, but for some reason did not write than in any of the reviews I have submitted to you thus far. I mean it though, for every review. Thanks.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

You're reading so fast, your questions will be answered soon!  I LOVE that you're liking this. Totally makes my day.  I'm doing a little happy dance right now.  I think this story gets overlooked because of the sexual assault aspect and I get that. But for me the story is more about the family and how they come together to support Bella, rather than that event which is never explained in graphic detail.  Sure there's darkness all around, but out of the darkness comes light - or something pretty and poetic like that!

M

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 01:01 PM · On: Chapter 6

Hi

I review everything I read, so of course I would review each chapter of your story. It takes only a minute to write down my thoughts. :)

I really love that Alice told Edward - she's our Bella too. That is so true. Bella is Alice's best friend and is like a daughter to Carlisle and Esme. She isn't someone that is JUST in Edward's life.

It is really great to see the entire Cullen clan banding together to support Edward. It's kind of a behind the scenes look that we didn't get to see in the Twilight series, and that was missing in Midnight Sun.

Speaking of Midnight Sun. I wanted to love it, but I didn't feel like it was new material. I wanted it to be full of behind the scenes action, and to be practically a new story, but it just wasn't. So I love that your story gives a bit of that. I haven't found a story that I felt did this behind the scenes justice yet.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

I've got to say, you're a really fast reader!!  I appreciate you reviewing every chapter - I often get so caught up in my reading that I forget to review after every chapter which really sucks because there's nothing I like more than hearing what people think, so I'm trying to be quite vigilant about that now myself.  If I like it, then I'll say so, and I genuinely appreciate you doing the same.  I actually feel quite guilty that you're taking time away from EYL, because I'm kind of selfish like that and I'm hanging out for your next chapter!!  :-)

I'd still love to read a complete Midnight Sun - it ended at the good part! But I know what you mean.  I wanted the Cullens to unite in my version of events to show just what kind of a normal and humane family they really are, despite the fact that they're not human.  

M

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 12:56 PM · On: Chapter 5

Hi

I really loved Emmett in this chapter, when he told Edward that the worst thing he could do for Bella (a victim of rape) is to look at her with the expression he currently had on his face. I always felt like the Cullens were so willing to just let Edward wallow and experience all sorts of self hate in the original novels - hell in my story they let him have that for eight years. I think it is really interesting that you are having Edward's siblings step up and force him to be a man. I like it.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

A lot of people like this version of Emmett.  He's the big, cuddly, jokey bear we all love, but there's also a lot more to him than that - or so I've always believed.  He married Rose for God's sake - there must be something more to him.  And yeah, Edward had to step up - wallowing in self pity for the next century isn't going to help Bella, and she is his priority now, even more than before I think.  

Mel

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 12:50 PM · On: Chapter 4

Hi

CRAP. Edward is going to watch the tape. He is going to go into angstward mode times ten once he sees that Bella has been raped.

I really enjoyed the interactions between the Cullen family. I thought it was very well written and each character clearly had their own distinct voice. Nice job.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

I love writing Angstward - it's what we all love about him, among many other far more obvious things!  Thanks for your reviews. 

M

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 12:44 PM · On: Chapter 3

Hello,

OH NO CHARLIE. Bella is really in for it when she wakes up. I wonder what happened with the tape. Is Edward going to see it? Are any of the Cullen's going to see it?

This was a really nice Edward POV.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

It's mostly all Edward's POV from now on for obvious reasons, with a couple of exceptions down the track.  

Mel

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 12:33 PM · On: Chapter 2

Hi

Another intense chapter. Arg. I should have started reading this chapter earlier in the day because there is no way I am going to get through all the chapters you have posted in the next hour and a half. I'm going to leave for work, probably at a really crucial point in your story, and not be able to concentrate. That ALWAYS happens to me. :)

Bella was raped by James. I wonder if you are going by the same methodolgy presented in Breaking Dawn, so there is a possibility of a pregnancy. Or if you are going by the reasoning that I, and I think everyone else believed prior to Breaking Dawn, that vampires cannot impregnant humans. Hmm...

Intersting. Very, very interesting.

jmeyer



Author's Response:

J - you are seriously spoiling me here by reviewing each chapter! As for your observations - I'll never tell! 

Mel

Reviewer: jmeyer (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 12:25 PM · On: Chapter 1

Hello,

WOW. What an intense first chapter, seriously. This is truly an original idea, in the world of twilight fanfic. This is a really great first chapter, really dark.

j



Author's Response:

Hey there - thanks so much for checking it out. Coming from you, I am humbled!  I hope the rest of it doesn't get too dark for you, but hang in there.  It's an intense ride.  THANK YOU so much for reading and reviewing.  

Mel

Reviewer: Lilly9999 (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 11:43 AM · On: Chapter 18

The story is wonderful, great job! Can't wait to read more!



Author's Response:

I'm really glad that you like it.  Thank you so much for reviewing.  

Mel

Reviewer: Sparky (Signed) · Date: March 15, 2009 11:30 AM · On: Chapter 18

oooo  what's gonna happen with jacob?!?!?! This story is so sad and dark, but it is called the darker side of twilight! I love this story!! :D Please update soon!



Author's Response:

Yep - I guess the title really fits!  I'm so happy that you love this story. Thanks so much for reviewing.  

Mel

Reviewer: JuliannaOphelia (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 10:32 PM · On: Chapter 18

wow, i really like where you're going with this. Keep up the good work.



Author's Response:

I'm really happy you like how it's going.  Thank you for reviewing. 

Mel

Reviewer: Babette (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 09:07 PM · On: Chapter 18

So, you have Jacob changing into a werewolf much earlier?  I can't wait to see how you plan to use him.  Obviously, he is going to be much more than a love-triangle issue, with the vitriol he was thinking.  I imagine quite the battle between the wolves and the Cullens.  Kind of like what could have happened if they hadn't banded together?



Author's Response:

Yes, Jacob and others definitely changed earlier in my version.  I hope you like how it all turns out.  Thanks so much for reviewing. 

Mel

Reviewer: shasta (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 08:36 PM · On: Chapter 18

An extremely well written chapter. It's nice to see Bella take charge. I am sad this story will be ending soon. :*(



Author's Response:

Thanks for the continued support Shasta.  I really appreciate your consistent and generous reviews.

Mel

Reviewer: rebmatmak (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 05:24 PM · On: Chapter 18

That was great!  Looking forward to more soon!



Author's Response:

Thanks, I'm really glad you liked it.  More will be coming soon.  Thanks so much for reviewing.

Mel

Reviewer: cinemapersians (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 05:15 PM · On: Chapter 18

No kidding this is dark!  I hate the twists that ended with the death of Bella's parents and her horrible injuries, but I have to admit to rejoicing at the immaturity of Jacob being brought to the forefront.  What can I say?  I'm a full-fledged member of Team Edward.  This is a well-written, thought out story.  Please update soon!



Author's Response:

Welcome fellow Team Edward member. You are among friends here! Thank you for reviewing and somehow enjoying this story despite the darkness and the other "unfortunate" occurrences! I really do appreciate that. As for Jacob, what can I say - he is what he is, and I have just used that to the advantage of my story. Again, thanks so much for reviewing. 

Mel

Reviewer: SaraCGeorgeBob (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 04:03 PM · On: Chapter 18

Yeah for you making Jacob the dog that he is!!!! I love you story :)



Author's Response:

AHA, another kindred spirit! Come on over to the story thread under the AU Forums - we can discuss the mutt, I mean Jacob, as much as you'd like!!  Thank you for reviewing.

Mel

Reviewer: Brie (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 01:55 PM · On: Chapter 18

oh my god!! i love it hurry with the next one!! please have Bella be happy again soon and get over her nightmares!!



Author's Response:

Thank you for reviewing.  I love that you're loving it.  New chapter soonish - couple of days at most. We must be patient with Bella - she'll get there eventually!  

Mel

Reviewer: Olirin (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 12:21 PM · On: Chapter 18

Wow!  That was wonderful and intense.  I really love how powerful you have made Bella!  She is so articulate and well spoken...and very brave!    The discussion between Billy Black and Bella was very  cool.  I am also proud of Edward for letting Bella do her own thing even when he is worried about her.  Oh and Jacob!  This might have been what he was like if these events had occurred.  I love what you have done with him...I really think you wrote him in character.  He has the potential to be possessive and agressive.  We already know he is capable of forcing himself on Bella!  The plot is so interesting and once again, so well written!  Oh and thanks for reccomending Twilightzoner!  I can't wait for your next chapter!!!

Reviewer: Olirin (Signed) · Date: March 14, 2009 12:21 PM · On: Chapter 18

Wow!  That was wonderful and intense.  I really love how powerful you have made Bella!  She is so articulate and well spoken...and very brave!    The discussion between Billy Black and Bella was very  cool.  I am also proud of Edward for letting Bella do her own thing even when he is worried about her.  Oh and Jacob!  This might have been what he was like if these events had occurred.  I love what you have done with him...I really think you wrote him in character.  He has the potential to be possessive and agressive.  We already know he is capable of forcing himself on Bella!  The plot is so interesting and once again, so well written!  Oh and thanks for reccomending Twilightzoner!  I can't wait for your next chapter!!!



Author's Response:

OOOH I'm so excited, you actually said the words, "I really think you wrote him in character. He has the potential to be possessive and aggressive...." about Jacob.  YES YES YES - this is exactly how I feel about Jacob.  I have taken the character traits that I believe he already possesses, and through circumstances (some beyond his control), he has turned into this character.  For me it's not that much of a stretch, although the Team Jacob's out there will disagree with me I'm sure.  It's just so great seeing that other people feel this way too.  I don't think he's inherently evil or anything. He's not a one dimensional character.  But I just think the signs were there all along in the original books - IMO!  Okay - quick subject change - I've been doing a LOT of pimping today, but I'm going to do it again. I'm trying to breathe some life into my thread over on the AU section of the forum, so come on over and let's talk Jacob, or whatever you want.  It could get interesting - you never know!  Okay, that's about as far as I can go with that - I'm not that good of a pimp!  

Thanks for reviewing - Really appreciate it.  And yeah, Bella can be tough when the people she loves are threatened. She just has a tougher time being strong for herself. But she's getting there, slowly. And she really loves the Cullens.  

Mel

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