Your donations help keep this site running, thank you very much for the support!
Reviewer: lovesfool (Signed) · Date: January 31, 2009 10:10 PM · On: Friends in Low Places
Ah dang it, you made me like Lauren! I gotta admit, she did have some good nuggets of wisdom. I really hope Edward comes to his senses soon and works out everything with Bella...bc, how could he not?? Anyway, fantastic writing again!!
Reviewer: jenniesmith (Signed) · Date: January 31, 2009 06:35 PM · On: More Than Friends
great lemon! very sweet and satisfying! Loved the chapter! I hope that we are now able to see more of Bella letting go and coming back home!
xoxo
jennie
Reviewer: barbarito (Signed) · Date: January 31, 2009 10:45 AM · On: Make New Friends
OME!! Poor bella! I cannot believe how depressed she is and how mean she was to Alice. I hope things get better for her
Reviewer: Natsu2 (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 10:14 PM · On: More Than Friends
Very nice attempt at your first juicy lemon! I didn't think it would happen in this chapter since Charlie's still in the hosiptal, but I can totally understand taking one look at Edward. How can you resist? lol
My only suggestion when it comes to lemony goodness is take your time and describe, describe, describe. We love details when it comes to sexytime so don't ever hold back. Don't rush the scene because they're usually intense. If you write it fast, then it seems like a quickie.
I love this story so please don't take that personally! Just some constructive criticism. Can't wait to see what happens the next day! I wonder if Edward even went back to his hotel.... :)
Author's Response: I absolutely don't take it personally. And I love description too. In this case, when I thought about Bella, her discomfort with the topic drove me to stifle the detail. And in the end, the experience was rushed for them. Now, should their be a lemon from EPOV, the detail would definitely be juicier.
Reviewer: Padme1899 (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 05:40 PM · On: Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs
It's such a sweet story. I love it keep going.
Reviewer: Jennmc (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 05:23 PM · On: More Than Friends
Great job with your first time anytihng lemony.
I can't wait to see what happens between them the morning after.
Reviewer: kaypgirl (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 04:46 PM · On: More Than Friends
"I could have fallen asleep like that. I wish I had." Dun dun dun...
Sadly, I don't think that Edward was quite ready for the l-word. Of course, he hasn't even figured out what or why he feels for Bella. If he discribed the pull he feels for her to anyone he knows, they'd get in a heart beat. Stupid, stupid boy. Odd how love and lust was so at odds in his relationship with Bella.
Reviewer: kaypgirl (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 04:30 PM · On: Let's Talk About Sex
Silly Edward (well, more like stupid Edward). Has he never thought of three little letters regarding this instinct with Bella? W. H. Y.
Reviewer: barbarito (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 03:28 PM · On: Biology
EEW!! Edward and skanky Lauren. He is lucky he didn't catch a disease!!He was always looking out for Bella. Love it! Cannot wait to see what happens next!
Reviewer: barbarito (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 02:41 PM · On: Bike
Love it!! Totally want more!
Reviewer: lovesfool (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 02:29 PM · On: More Than Friends
Wow. I seriously...like love you. I'm gonna have to say that this is my new favorite on Twilighted. I just finished reading all the chaps and I'm like..whoa! Lol, I seriously can't think of better words than wow and whoa because..I can't think haha!
Anyway, I love their relationship from the beginning in high school. And I love how much drama and indecision Edward goes through. And poor Bella, her life is just crap and I sympathize with her. And if that was your first attempt at a lemon...double wow and whoa. I simply loved it and the entire story. So please keep it up and give yourself a hug for me!
Author's Response: Thank you for the hug!
Reviewer: Scarlett_Letters (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 02:20 PM · On: More Than Friends
Lemony goodness, T. You did great! The next time I see you in person I'm going to blush, you naughty thing!
OME, SHE SAID ILY! OH GOD! Um, I noticed no condom...that won't be an issue, right?
I'm so glad Edward had the balls to start the convo about his feelings. I heart this story.
Charlie's going to be ok, right?
Author's Response: Since it'll probably be at your house, I'll be the one blushing! Lots of stuff to deal with between these two, eh?
Reviewer: barbarito (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 11:45 AM · On: Brown Eyed Girl
Wow!! Loved getting EPOV on the past and how he feels about Bella
Author's Response: Thanks for the reviews. I hope you continue to enjoy the story.
Reviewer: barbarito (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 11:32 AM · On: Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs
Totally intrigued and liking this so far!
Reviewer: historicvampirelover (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 06:50 AM · On: More Than Friends
First attempt? So good!
Edward was brave here, to admit that he wants her, but so was Bella, to allow her devil to take control The result is delicious.
Can't wait to see the aftermath along the way to HEA!
Reviewer: LovesSparkles (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 05:55 AM · On: More Than Friends
"I could have fallen asleep like that. I wish I had."
hmm sounds ominous!
thanks for the update:)
Reviewer: hhawkes (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 05:48 AM · On: More Than Friends
Wow, she sees Edward again and boom, her luck is back.
Reviewer: keepingupwiththekids (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 05:46 AM · On: More Than Friends
Oh - let Edward love her back! The lemon was perfect - I want more! I cannot wait for more!
Reviewer: Jime (Signed) · Date: January 30, 2009 04:27 AM · On: More Than Friends
I had already left the beach; I was paddling out to sea. I caught the wave; I hung 10; I crashed to shore laughing, crying, and feeling victorious.
I.loved.that.line, actually I loved all of it, and one of the reasons may be how unexpected it was. They boarded the topic with honesty and took a leap, I cant wait to see where they go from here. Amazing chapter!!!!
Author's Response: Thank you . As always, your review brightens my day!
Reviewer: littlebit (Signed) · Date: January 29, 2009 10:26 PM · On: More Than Friends
I think you did a great job on your first lemon. It was sexy, but not overly graphic.
Now the last line has me feeling that the phone is going to ring.....
Author's Response: Thank you! You should come play on the thread--share your predictions!
Reviewer: AcidAngel (Signed) · Date: January 29, 2009 10:20 PM · On: More Than Friends
Oh my god, so good. Seriously, I just posted my first lemon and was worried, but the response has been all favourable.
And yours is way hotter, haha. But also so fitting to the mood of the story. I really love this story. Immensely.
Author's Response: Mmwaaa! Thanks!
Reviewer: whynot (Signed) · Date: January 29, 2009 10:18 PM · On: More Than Friends
Did you and monster share sex-brain this week? :) I'm not sure what to think about this. On the one hand, we have established that they had a relationship, and that they think about each other, nd that Bella has a crap life, so I guess those points make this possible. On the other hand, she is really uptight and stressed, and he isn't really sure how he feels, so by that measure the sex seems...too abrupt, maybe? Not the sex itself (you did fine on that), but having them go there right then. Hmmm... I have to think on this a little.
You are a very good writer, though. THANKS!
Author's Response: I couldn't agree more. It was abrupt. And they will have to deal with the consequences. It wasn't a well thought out action. Thanks for the review!
Reviewer: thot-2 (Signed) · Date: January 29, 2009 09:18 PM · On: More Than Friends
The lemon not too shabby, the cliffie........ sucked! Here's to quick updates!! :)
Author's Response: I'll try. I promise!
Reviewer: MrsRobertPattinson (Signed) · Date: January 29, 2009 09:13 PM · On: More Than Friends
I. Loved. It. 'Nuf said.
Author's Response: I appeciate it very much!
Reviewer: TeamJasper13 (Signed) · Date: January 29, 2009 08:57 PM · On: More Than Friends
Okay, your first attempt at lemons went very very well imho. It was definitely the right mix of steamy and sweet. You kind of get the foreshadowing that more conflict is coming when the angel is telling Bella that it's too soon for this, but I still can't regret that the devil won that confrontation. I can't wait for the next Edward pov to see his thoughts on all this. And I don't know if it's gonna happen, but it'd be awesome if Alice shows up there as well so her and Bella could mend their fences...and I think it would be a very Alice thing to do as well. You and hmonster4 are both awesome...I'm loving your stories right now and I'll definitely have to find and read Breakfast at Tiffany's! Thanks for the new chapter; hoping for the next one soon!
Author's Response: I appreciate your thoughts! And definitely go read Breakfast at Tiffany's! I think you'll love it.
Submit a Review
|
© 2008, 2009 Twilighted Enterprises, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Unauthorized duplication is a violation of applicable laws.
Privacy Policy | Terms of Service
All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the intellectual property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.
|
|
