I'm a little late in getting this to you...it was a harried weekend and yesterday I took my time and savoured this chapter, wrote my review and then ff.net was down. But wait!! Future Imperfect is also on Twilighted! I forgot how much I miss this place. It's like revisiting an old friend.

You had mentioned this chapter was shorter than others. The only problem with that is you leave us wanting more! :) You did not waste a word and you transitioned us beautifully from the harried flight out of the madness of the burning throne room to momentary reprieve and resounding reconnection for our beleaguered lovers. Not an easy feat yet you pull it out of your hat like a practiced magician.

The reference to the biblical story of Lot's wife and this moment you paint in the passage below is simply breath taking. The way you show the correlation between Bella and Lot's wife is quite clever, and really impressed me...

"With Volterra to her back, Bella couldn't help but remember the Bible story of Lot's wife - how she looked back at the sinful city falling to ruin even though God had instructed her not to. In punishment, she was turned into a pillar of salt. Bella had always wondered: did the woman turn back because, like her, she feared the unknown that lay ahead or because the woman worried in her heart she could not leave behind the sinful ways? Feeling a strange mixture of both, Bella turned to look back.

She did not see a city ablaze from the judgment of God; only a thin trail of black smoke winding its way from the turret into the dark winter sky. The reinforced Throne Room doors would contain the fire, and the city would awaken blissfully unaware of what had transpired the night before. But she knew Marcus was in that room. Would he leave the vampire world leaderless? If so, what sort of vampire anarchy would arise?"

The whole bit with Ed, Eddy and the funny banter that followed after Edward slammed Dominic into the chest was the perfect comic relief to the tense but euphoric moment of freedom being only a hundred mile run away for our heros.

One thing that always hits the mark is your ability to layer so much emotion into your characters. Bella's distress and despondency over leaving Volterra is written really well and handled with such careful devotion by your Edward. I love how they both went hand in hand to the peak of the summit, looking back at what Bella ran from, discussing it, exorcising it and putting it behind them before making the descent to more even ground. These scenes you choose to show us are so poignant and meaningful, ever enhancing and strengthening our bond to your story.

When Bella bit Edward....~swoon~ I loved this. I couldn't wait to see what you did here and you nailed it! I really liked the mention of how Marcus did not "claim" Isabella and it was Isabella who claimed Edward instead of the other way around. It was like a sacred communion between the two lovers. This is my body. This is my blood. They found safety and sanctity and forgiveness in each other.

For the moment! Our gang aren't out of the woods yet! ;)

So many questions you left for us at the end! You are the master at telling a story that makes us want to keep turning pages! I can't wait to see what you have next!

 

Xo

Kari

 

Author's Response:

Kari!  Wow.  I must say my cheeks are burning as much as they hurt from smiling.  Thanks so much for the wonderful review.  

I have realized looking back over this story how many of the Bible stories have stuck with me.  I believe when I saw this trend a while ago, I think I made some reference to Charlie telling Bible stories to Bella as a girl -- much like my father did to me.  But no matter what denomination a person is, the Bible is full of  timeless lessons.  And I didn't even capture in my minds eye what you mentioned about the communion between lovers!  I so love when a reader sees something more in the story!

I'll tell you again, I swooned when I read about Bella getting her sustinence from Edward in your story, and I just had, had, had to include that.  My loins melted dammit!!  I'm glad you liked how I did it, but still ... your the queen of Edward biting!

My story telling pales in comparison to yours, but I am so flattered that you find mine worth your time!  I'm feeling only about two more chapters and a future take here...so she is coming to an end! (Then you won't have to deal with my pushy timelines!!)

 

So, I'm back, now that I've calmed myself and re-read the chapter. And I have to say, that once again, it was a marvellous read. The scene between Edward and Bella was wonderfully done. You have captured both their insecureties but also the great love between them. Edward really is wise. In the books he often comes across as arrogant, but in this story it really helps, that you use the third-person narrative, to better explain the motives of the acting characters.

Since you've posed all my questions below your chapter, I will only say, that I'm still very interested to see the next installment and compliment you for the great story-telling.

Author's Response:

I'm so glad you came back.  I was just pacing about how to respond to your first comment.  While I was wringing my hands wondering if I totally messed up, I remembered my personal main goal as a "writer" is to evoke emotion in the reader.  So, after reading your first "review", I guess I succeeded!  Except, I certainly didn't want that disappointment turned on me!  Believe me, I came to love Marcus through this story.  His was the character I had to work most on forming in order to gain sympathy and affection for -- I mean he is part of the Volturi!  We were taught by SM to dislike/distrust them.  So, even though his story is the most tragic of the Volturi brothers, if I got you or other readers to actually root for him --- I did accomplish something cool.

Interestingly though, I was considering letting him continue is some form, but one of my betas actually pleaded with me to let him go and be with his mate in the afterlife -- she said "he deserves to be happy" and letting him continue without his mate was cruel of me.  So... Marcus's HEA may be in the eye of the beholder (aka the reader)...

I hope we have made nice and are friends again!  Thank you for the kind words in this review.  I think the world of Bella and Edward as characters. Yes, they are flawed -- all the Cullens are in some way -- and that's why we like them so much.  They have all overcome obstacles/faced their demons and came out stronger for it.  And I know that is what I aspire to do.

Thank you!

Yipee. I loved it! 

Author's Response:

Excellent! *whispers* I liked it too.

Alright... I had to read it twice to digest the full impact. 

Good battle and great decision on Dominic's part.  No, I wasn't surprised and I did enjoy how the fight went down - even seeing the plausibility of what happened.  

And yes, I'm looking beyond the horizon and wondering exactly where you are going to go with this... for clearly, the Volturi have been defeated - Edward and Bella are united - and G and Dominic... hmmm... Fork maybe?  Marcus... it'll be interesting to see what happens to him.

In any event, I'm looking forward to a reunion of sort between Bella and the rest of the Cullens.

Thanks for sharing your wonderful talent - for I'm enjoying it!

Author's Response:

Thanks so much for continuing to support this story.  It's amazing how I outline and set out to write one thing, and then the action or characters take over and it morphs.  Sometimes I'm surprised as well -- like next chapter (not really what I attempted to write, but Bella and Edward's love won out over angst!).

You will get a B&E reunion (earlier than I planned) next chapter.  But a reunion of sorts with the Cullens is on the horizon (as is the end of the story!)

Thank you again for your kind words and I'm glad we've made a connection through this story.

That was one rollercoaster of a chapter! Phew. Aro and Caius both out, did I get that right? I have to admit, I would liked to see an epic fight between Caius and Dominic, but I suppose it wasn't necessary to the progress of the story. Also, Bella's plan surprised me. When I read last chapter, I thought she was wily, and that maybe the Volturi had got to her, but this chapter showed her undiminished sense of justice, which I really appreciated. The scenes between Gianna and Dominic were heartrending. Seing the Volturi brought low by infighting was extremely gratifiying. I already look forward to your next chapter (Will we see the rest of the Cullen-clan, then?)

PS: I read one your reviews, where the reviewer said they were disappointed that this was no Edward-bashing, or something like that. Personally, I cannot understand this; to me it is always a joy to read stories with characters who behave like real persons, rather than being stereotypes, whether or not I like them is quite irrelevant to me, then, and you you have done so quite beautifully.

Author's Response:

Oh thank you!  I enjoyed writing this chapter so much!  I have never written a scene quite like it.  Truth be told, this chapter could have gone in many directions and focused on many of the individual battles, but I was actually worried it would have sounded like BD2's battle scene.  Probably if I had written mine first, it may have been different, who knows?

I have left some things unclear on purpose.  You never know what -- or who -- might appear later in the story!  I have enjoyed writing the twists and turns and really envy the authors who are good at that -- I just gave it my best try.  And because you asked, the Cullen clan will make an appearance again in the story!  I just love them all.

I wasn't sure what to make of the review you mentioned.  Bashing as in fighting?  Bashing as in verbally abusing?  IDK.  But I really couldn't see how my summary made this impression.  Ah well, I know you can't please everyone all the time and this story is not for everyone.  But I am very thankful you are reading and I appreciate your support!

This continues to be a thrilling ride.  I did, however, think that Bella would kill Chelsea, but now that I know her situation, I kind of like her... so, I'm glad you didn't have Bella kill her. 

Edward and Bella appear to be a force AND I can sense Aro eventually going down. 

Yes - this continues to be a thrilling ride and I can't thank you enough for the Christmas present.

Author's Response:

Sorry it's taken me so long to respond to your review.  Actually, in my original version of this chapter, Bella did kill Chelsea!  My beta asked me to rethink it and I'm glad I did.  The more twists the more fun!  The next chapter is up and it is the "big battle".  I hope you enjoy it (but be prepared, it's a long chapter)

I do not know, wether I already reviewed this story, but if not then I wish to compliment you on this excellently written piece of fiction. Now to the recent chapter, I have to admit, when I read this for the first time I was actually outraged, and it is not a negative thing to say, because it has been a long time since I've read a fanfiction that moved me to the kind of anger I experienced, when Edward told Bella it would be merciful to deny Marcus the truth about Didyme's death, and the reasons he gave for it being better if the Volturi remained in power. But when I read this for second time, I could follow his thoughts and understand why Edward would say something like this. Usually in fanfiction it is hard for me to recognize that Edward truly is Carlisle's son in all things that matter, but you've captured his personality beautifully. Also I want to congratulate you on a really wonderful capture of Bella's character (I usually don't like her, but the way you write her is how I wished she'd been done in the books, actually). Generally all the characters in the story are believable in the way you write them; thinking and acting. Oh I could write so much about how I appreciate your story but I lack the words and instead simply say thank you!

Author's Response:

Thank you for such a substantial comment.  I was so wow'd to read it and quickly forwarded it to my wonderful team!  This story has truly benefitted from their input.

For me, Twi fanfic has been an incredible outlet of emotion.  My first two fanfics were all about the feelings of love and romance.  It was so exhilerating to let these feelings out.  Then I tried controversy, writing about issues like religious beliefs, abortion (via Bella's situation), euthanasia -- and liked getting to think these through via the Twi characters and maybe getting others to do the same.  Then it was on to comedy.  Now, through Future Imperfect, I wanted to look at the way power and control comes into our lives, how we seek it, and how we use it to get what we want.  But ultimately, with this story, I wanted to show personal growth and that love does conquer all.

I shared that with you because I was especially touched by your comment that you were moved emotionally by this story -- even if it was anger.  I guess I'm hitting that emotion pretty hard in this story.  I know many have given up on this story because of the negative emotions it contains.  But growth can come from this emotion too if one is reflective.

Um, maybe I'm getting too reflective!  Sorry to drone on, but I do want to say your review/comments are much appreciated and I hope you also like romantic endings!

 

Interesting that Bella wants to take Marcus with her.  I'm glad she didn't kill Chelsea and Afton.

Author's Response:

Bella has a plan that will become much clearer next chapter.  It is interesting to write a character that is aware she was being manipulated by the lure of power who is in somewhat of denial that it worked!  It's hard to write these two sides of newborn Bella and I do hope it comes through!  Thank you for reading and reviewing!

I certainly wasn't expecting the immortal child. 

Living so close to the Newtown tragedy, I worry about my own children & hope for peace & safety for them. I think peace is a new concept for some folks

Author's Response:

I wasn't expecting an immortal child either!  This story has taken on more twists and turns as I try to outsmart/trap Aro.  What a tricky devil he is!  

We had our own local school shooting in February.  It's a horrific thing no matter where, but you are right, when it happens in your own backyard, it has a stronger impact.  We do seem to be becoming a more violent society than a peaceful one.  

 

Oh wow I'm loving this story!! So well written!  Looking forward to the next chapter :-)

Author's Response:

Thank you so much for your kind review!  Sorry it took so long to respond, but I'm glad you are loving it.  Chapter 38 is now posted with 39 looking like it will pack a big punch!

Woohoo! Hooray for progress! Now to get untangled from the mess & go home for their HEA

Author's Response:

Thank so much for your reivew, but for every step forward, there seems to be two steps back!  The mess is about to get more messy (but I agree -- I can't wait to write the big, mushy, lovey ending!!).  Happy Holidays! (chapter 38 is now posted!!!)

I hope Bella ends Chelsea.  Without her, Volterra will be very different.

Author's Response:

Thanks for the review and rating!  Btw us, I so ended Chelsea at the end of this chapter and two of my three betas said "no".  Sigh.  They said it would take away from the suspense by leaving B&E no choice but to kill the rest or be killed.  Bummer.  But they can't keep me from killing some Volturi/guards forever!!!  So I made them no promises Chelsea won't get it in the end!  

Excellent !! Excellent !! Excellent !! Love it well written the suspense is killing me what happens next ???

cant wait to read more !!!!

Author's Response:

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

I have to admit, the chapters have been taking more time to write, so I do apologize for the delay, but I'm so trying to get the climax just right!  Thank you for your continued support and reviews!