Oh wow. That so goes into my favourites.
I absolutely adore the way you fused the Post-Deathly Hallows HP world with Pre-Twilight. The characters are fully in. Character, that is.
Hermione, helpful, know-it-allish - and if she doesn't know, at least she knows that.
Severus, slightly mellowed, which is only too believable since he doesn't have to deal with dunderheads all the time.
I liked Cedric as well - and the way you were making him Edward.
Lovely Cullen family inserts as well, and a beautiful view into the post BD family life at the ending. (Though, really, what have Herm and Sev been doing those last few years if they missed any memo about that little anti-Volturi uproar??!)
Plus, the little BtVS inspiration? Very, very well thought of, and I agree, an integration of more of BtVS key magic would rather have disturbed the flow. So I liked the Africa trip as well.
The one thing I don't like that much is Hermione's shielding. But maybe that's just me, and honestly I don't have a better plot idea how to prevent Edward from picking things he shouldn't know right out of H & S's brains. He's annoying like that. And a cheat, says Emmett.
Thanks for the detailed review! I hadn't really wanted to give Hermione a superpower, but yeah, it was the only way I could think of to avoid letting Edward read their minds and spoil everything. And I did want Snape and Hermione to remember what had happened, so wiping their memories wouldn't have worked either. *shrug*