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Reviewer: vampiremom1221 (Signed) · Date: July 25, 2010 02:12 PM · On: Chapter 4

I love devious Bella and user Edward and James are turn offs.  I wish one of them would develop a damn consciounce.  Looking forward to that day.



Author's Response:

Thanks for the review!  Don't worry, both boys will developa concience.  Thanks for reading!

Reviewer: mscope (Signed) · Date: July 25, 2010 12:19 PM · On: Chapter 4

How in the hell does this story have so few reviews?  This is without a doubt one of the best teen stories I have read.

Okay so now I forgot everything I was going to say.  Need to focus!  Let's see.  First James.  He is so drawn to Bella.  I don't understand what could have gone so horribly wrong for them?  He seems drawn to her vulnerability and have feelings for her he never thought possible.  It is like he is able to be himself when he is with her and not have to put on errors or live up to someone else's standards.  We know he is there a week (?) earlier than everyone else so my guess is that once his friends arrive he will be back to the old bro's before ho's mentality.  And the shame is he is going to throw it all away.  Another thought that came to me ... You know there is nothing that says they had to have sex.  What if the bro's assume as much and James does not correct them.  Don't you know that would piss any girl off, so why would Bella be any different? 

Bella's showing up at his school is really doing a number on him as evidenced by his recurring Rolling Stone moments of Satisfaction.  There is the part of me that feels bad for him and his image ... NOT.  The reader has to love Bella with her strength and tell it like it is demeanor.   Loved the way she handled him in Physics.  I get the feeling he is resigned to the fact that he really blew it.  Does he have a prayer in hell in getting her back.

I am also looking at the Jasper/Bella dynamic.  You are writing it pretty low key but I can't help but wonder where that will go.  And then of course there is the Emmett/Bella dynamic.  So far that has stayed pretty platonic and I hope with that is in me that it will remain like that.  I can't help but feel there will come the time that Bella is going to really need the "big brother" she can turn to.  Ah, maybe I have just read too much fan fiction, lol.

I haven't said much about the girls and quite frankly I don't have much of a grasp on them although a couple of them do stand out.  First is Angela.  We haven't seen much of her and all that we have really heard is that she is Edward's girlfriend.  We don't know much about that relationship and the thought has crossed my mind that it is only for looks *shrugs shoulders*, a mutual agreement of sorts.  I hope that she and Bella are going to form a friendship and we will get more perspective.

Tanya on the other hand has my attention because of her relationship with Edward.  She openly seeks his companionship and although we were told the ground rules for sharing in the beginning I don't think she wants to share.  And as easy as it has been to sneer at her in the first chapters I find my tune has changed a little after her conversation with her mama.   What is it with these men of the rich and infamous?  Don't you know that Tanya has to be hurt that this is all she gets and yet she puts out and takes what she can get in hopes of more.  I can't help but feel bad for her.  On the other hand if it were to come down to her and Bella, well all I can say is the bitch better move out the way.  Then I scoff at my own double standard. 

I have saved Edward for the last.  Yeah that man child holds a piece of heart no matter what his age.  Don't you know that Bella has his full attention.   Having her in his home has to be hard on him, no pun intended.  They are going to develop a relationship whether they want one or not.  The question is what will it consist of?  I could go on and on here but instead I will leave after two more thoughts.  

  1. What is the Swan/Cullen connection that brought Bella to Edward's house in the first place.
  2. Is Edward the friend that James talked about with the older brother?

And with that I leave you.  I believe you may have a chapter to write, after real life committments of course.  And I have a story to pimp.

Sandra

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Author's Response:

I have been waiting for days to respond to this! lol I figured I had to respond to all the others first though.  I have to say that I was so excited by this review that I've read it to all my RL friends.  So, thank you big time!

Yes, it is definitely hard to see James and Bella together in the past and then to see them now.  I had lots of thoughts on how to do this story and considered putting all the summer stuff at the very beginning, but I have had a lot of people tell me they prefer the back and forth.  Plus, it adds an air of mystery to it. lol  As I said in the last review, they will end up having sex, so, no, his friends won't assume he did her and he won't correct them.  But you're pretty close with your talk of bros before hoes.

James is really having a hard time with her being at school and it's making it ten times worse that she's already friends with all the girls in the group and that guys are quickly taking her in as well.  He's trying to go back to his old tricks on what would have made him feel better in the past, but as we see, it's just not working the same.  He really does know he blew it, but he's also not in a place where he's going to tell her that and beg for forgiveness.  At least, not yet.  And watching his friends fall all over her really isn't helping him either.

Jasper and Emmett are both going to play pretty big roles with Bella, but you will get your wish eventually when it comes to Emmett.  Jasper has a lot going on with him and it will be revealed bit by bit.  As he's not one of the major players in the story, it will take awhile before everything comes out.

As far as the girls go, Alice, Rosalie and Kate are a bit of background characters in this story.  They are important and will play important roles, but I don't follow them around as much.  We will see more of Angela bit by bit and more of her relationship with Edward in much the same way.

Tanya is a different kind of cookie.  I very much have a love/hate relationship with her, both in writing her and reading about her. lol  On the one hand, you just want to hate her because she seems so slutty and devious (maybe not yet, but she will).  Then on the other hand, you do kind of feel bad for her because she does really want Edward and she takes what she can get (literally as well).

Oh dear Edward.  How can we not have a soft spot for him?  He certainly is a confused little boy and a naughty one at that.  But, I love me some naughty Edward. ;)  Yes, he and Bella will definitely be forming a relationship, but how far it will go will be the question.

As far as your questions go...

1.  There is really no mystery to the Swan/Cullen connection.  Esme and Renee are very old friends and Renee asked Esme to take care of her daughter while the family travels abroad for a year.  Why did they have to travel during Bella's senior year?  So she could come to meet eveyone else, of course! lol

2.  Yes, Edward is the friend that James talked to Bella about over the summer.  We'll get to meet Edward's older siblings, Alec and Jane, a little while later.

I'm off to edit chapter 5 and hopefully submit it shortly.  Thanks so much again for your great reviews, I will really be looking froward to them from here on out.

 

Hugs,

Keira

Reviewer: kissyfur (Signed) · Date: July 25, 2010 11:17 AM · On: Chapter 4

And the plot thickens...

I must say, you have done an excellent job of taking fairly unsympathetic characters and making them likeable. I really can't wait to read more.



Author's Response:

Thanks so much for your review!  I really think there is something about these characters that even though they're so cruel and bitchy, you can't help but like them.  Thanks for reading!

Reviewer: mscope (Signed) · Date: July 25, 2010 09:29 AM · On: Chapter 3

This chapter gave us quite a bit of info on James.  I get the impression his parents do not see Bella as an equal for their son.  Well maybe that is just his mom.  But his dad seems to see women below his social status only good for one thing.  So if Bella does not fit the social standard set by his parents any rellationship they may have had would be doomed from the start.  Well that is just a thought actually.

The picnic was insightful.  His comfort level with her is endearing.  He let her see a part of himself that he does not show, after all he does have an image to uphold.  He is at an age where image is everything.  In an earlier chapter there was mention of Edward's attraction to Angela and her books and I feel it is answered here.  I found the time they spent together watching clouds, reading, playing cards, talking to be very intimate.   Reading about blossoming  their relationship in small doses makes it easier to process and I thank you for that.

You make mention of the strawberry scent she uses to mask her natural lilac one.  After reading the flashback it is understandable.  I don't think we fully understand the scope of the hurt she felt when James does reject her.  My over reactive mind moves to things like loss of virginity  or the fact that he simply used her as his father uses women.  Each of those is a worst case scenario in it's own right.  Yet we see a glimpse of Bella not wanting to picture James with another girl.  And in that same vein does Alice have a thing for James?    ("She walked in on James getting blown yesterday and cringes anytime we bring up sex now,") 

These poor little rich kids with their overactive hormones have totally captured my attention as I contemplate who will end up with who (or should I have used whom?).  Until all is revealed I am going to sit back and enjoy the ride.

Sandra



Author's Response:

I have to start off saying that you are quickly becoming one of my favorite reviewers!  I'm loving your insight and thought process.

James' mom actually does not have a problem with him seeing Bella.  She found it a little odd considering his past interest in girls.  James has always been the type to see a girl for just one thing, so when she notices that James is basically courting her (the bike ride and the picnic) she's intrigued.  We will actually see more of her later on and she will be sticking up for Bella.  Unfortunately, you have his father nailed.  He definitely sees women below him for only one thing and has very much pushed that impression onto his son.  While James has seen most girls as just sex for sport to this point, he still knows he doesn't want to end up with affair after affair like his father.

I really wanted to portray a different James during the summer flashbacks.  Bella makes him want to be this completely different person and obviouslty that'll come into play the more the story goes on.  Yes, just like Edward, James too is intrigued by a girl who differs from what he's used to.  He's grown up with Kate, Tanya, Alice and Rosalie who, as we see during present times, are very into their clothes, their cars, and their money and power.  Bella is a different kind of girl, but she still has the attractive looks that James goes after, making her that much more interesting to him.  And the fact that she doesn't take his bullshit just adds to it. lol

When we get to the end (or twards the end) of the summer flashbacks, we'll really see what Bella's reaction to James was and how it affects her.  James is very taken in by her lilac scent and so it becomes one of the things that she tries to hide, so to speak.  I will say that she doesn't lose her virginity to him.  While she's definitely not a slut, she does enjoy her own fun.  (Also, i know this will be a question later on when they do have sex, no she's not a virgin.)  And no, Alice does not have a thing for James, just seeing him getting blown creeped her out.

Thanks again for your review, I'm off to respond to the last one! lol

Reviewer: mscope (Signed) · Date: July 25, 2010 07:52 AM · On: Chapter 2

I am loving the flashbacks.  I don' t know that I've ever read a Marcus that I've liked before and yours is just so cool.  James seems to have been so smitten by Bella in the beginning.  I look forward to more of that back story to find out exactly what happened.  I am curious as to whether he will get the girl in the end or not.

Luckily for her Bella has found acceptance at her new school by both male and female.  Well for the most part anyway.  Did Alice put Jessica in her place or what?  Lauren knew better than to open her mouth.  That was so funny.  But it is the guys that have me laughing as they all notice Bella.  Even Edward is having dreams about her and since she is staying at his house he has a bit of an advantage, or not, depending on how you look at it.  

Now that more has been revealed I am curious as to who will be the "one" to catch her eye.  Will she go back to James?  Will something develop with Edward?  Ah, too many questions to ask.   So many ways the story can go. 



Author's Response:

I really wanted an older character that we don't see much of as a "guide" of sorts and Marcus just seemed perfect for the role.  I always got the feeling that he could have been a great leader for the vampire world if he hadn't lost Didyme, but I digress.  The back story will continue on for quite awhile until we get to the big 4th of July bash.  Will James be able to win Bella back?  That seems to be the million dollar question.

Bella did get a bit of a head start with females in the group.  I didn't make it real prominent, but she met them all at a finishing camp over the summer.  I love seeing a fiesty Alice and while she isn't quite as bitchy as the other girls, she definitely gets her point across.  Boys will be boys, won't they?  Good question, will it be an advantage for Edward having Bella right across the hall or a disadvantage?  Only time will tel. ;)

There are many ways this story can go, I completely agree.  Hopless romantics will want to see James and Bella over come whatever pulled them apart in the beginning, truists will want Edward and Bella together no matter what and then what about those Jasper and Emmett fans?  I will say that once you think Bella's made a decision, there will be more!

Reviewer: mscope (Signed) · Date: July 25, 2010 07:00 AM · On: Chapter 1

Wow.  This is really good.  I really like that the characters have been introduced and we get a sense of their friendship.  And Bella.  I like this girl.  The whole panty bet was great. 

Well moving on .....



Author's Response:

Thanks so much for the review!  I really think sometimes, we can't help but like bitchy charachters.  Bella is definitely a different breed than the rest of these kids, but she can hold her own too.  I loved writing the bet, it was actually the first scene I wrote.  Thanks again!

Reviewer: Jasperslover (Anonymous) · Date: July 24, 2010 10:47 PM · On: Chapter 4

Cant wait to read more. I wonder if Bella will end up with James or Edward. pls update soon =)



Author's Response:

Thanks for the review!  What makes you think James and Edward are the only ones competing for Bella?  We have a couple other boys who are interested as well. ;)

Reviewer: JeannieRoss (Signed) · Date: July 24, 2010 10:41 PM · On: Chapter 4

Awsome Fic, totally loving it and cannot wait for more!



Author's Response:

Thanks so much for the review!  I'm editing chapter 5 today and will be submitting it soon.

Reviewer: gopher4953 (Signed) · Date: July 24, 2010 08:12 PM · On: Chapter 4

Hey Keira!

Great chappie, sweetie! Seems even the "older" Cullen's are not the sweet compassionate characters from the TS. This is really good and unique!

Can't wait for the next chapter of the OOC characters! Lovin' it sweetie and I definitely want MORE PLEASE!

Love ya,

 Ellen xx



Author's Response:

No, the older Cullens are definitely not the sweet characters we've come to know.  I had never really contemplated a cruel or brusque Carlisle until I read Breakfast at Tiffany's or Scotch, Gin and the New Girl, but I think it's a good addition every now and again.  Don't get me wrong, I love it when Carlisle and Esme are the perfect parents, but there's something intriging about them being bad.  And it won't just be Carlisle, you'll see a very different Esme later in the story too.  I'm glad you're enjoying it so much.

Thanks for all the support!

~Keira

Reviewer: twilightervamp (Signed) · Date: July 24, 2010 02:05 PM · On: Chapter 3

Hey, this is turning into a good story. Am I to assume that Edward and Bella wind up together or is there a different twist to this one?

Hugs,

Louise



Author's Response:

Thanks so much for your review!  Will Bella and Edward end up together?  Hmmm, not sure I can answer that. lol  I will say that once you think Bella's got it all figured out, there's still more coming! :)

Reviewer: gopher4953 (Signed) · Date: July 21, 2010 05:38 PM · On: Chapter 3

Hi sweets!

My my these girls are bitchy, aren't they! Even little Alice! So Edward is having dreams about Bella, but still is attatched to Angela! hmmm! And Tanya, whew! Seems like they are all friends, but wouldn't hesitate to cut each other's throats!

Y'now, I kinda feel sorry for all of these kids. They've been made to grow up too fast by parents that really don't seem to care as long as they don't embarass them.

Your past story has me really curious as to what happened between Bella and James. Waiting anxiously for the next update, darlin' so that I can have some MORE PLEASE!

Love ya, bb!

Ellen xx

PS. Emmett's own story! *le sigh*



Author's Response:

Sorry it's taken me so long to reply.  Between writing this story and editing it, editing AWA and replying to reviews, my time gets spread pretty thin, but I love that you take time to review, so I want to make sure I always reply.

Yes, all of these girls are bitchy, some more than others though.  Yes, our boy Edward is sure an interesting study; he's dating Angela, fooling around with Tanya and dreaming about Bella.  He's definitely got a lot to figure out.

It'll be awhile before we find out exactly what happened between James and Bella, but we'll see more unfold little by little.

Thanks again!

~Keira

Reviewer: angfet24 (Signed) · Date: July 18, 2010 02:09 PM · On: Chapter 3

Arg, I wish there were more chapters posted - I'm loving this story!!!! Great job!



Author's Response:

Chapter 4 coming soon, I promise!  Thanks for the review and the love!

Reviewer: angfet24 (Signed) · Date: July 18, 2010 02:09 PM · On: Chapter 2

Hmmm, I'm liking this Bella. I prefer fics where she isn't the mousy, poor girl! Wondering what is going on with Edward, is he gonna be James' competition????



Author's Response:

I too love a strong and rich Bella.  Not sure if you've read Scotch, Gin, and the New Girl, but that's one of my favorite Bellas.  I can't reveal if Edward will be James' competition or not, but I will say he's going to have quite a bit of it.  Thanks for reading!

Reviewer: angfet24 (Signed) · Date: July 18, 2010 02:07 PM · On: Chapter 1

Very different take on James...I'm excited for it!



Author's Response:

Thanks for your review!  I thought it would be nice to see some of the other Twilight characters, but I couldn't neglect the main ones either.  I hope you enjoy!

Reviewer: kissyfur (Signed) · Date: July 18, 2010 12:47 PM · On: Chapter 3

I'm finding myself very drawn in by this story, and hope you continue it.



Author's Response:

Thanks for your review!  Don't worry, I am definitely continuing it.

Reviewer: x-stephanie-x (Signed) · Date: July 13, 2010 02:08 PM · On: Chapter 2

ooooooooooo things are definitely hotting up here!

well done! loving the cruel intentions/gossip girl/twilightiness thats going on!

thanks,

stephanie =] x



Author's Response:

You totaly pegged the motif I was going for.  CI/GG/Twilight indeed!  lol  Thanks for reading!

Reviewer: gopher4953 (Signed) · Date: July 12, 2010 09:09 PM · On: Chapter 2

Hey, Sweetie!

My but these children are a hot and horney bunch of rich brats, aren't they? Can't wait to find out what really happened between Bella and James and who will eventually hook up with whom. Of course you KNOW that I love your Emmett! He is my favorite McCarty-Cullen you know! Surprise! lol!

Very interesting, my dear, and am looking forward to your next chappie! Of course this is already on my faves list, as you have been!

Now, give us MORE PLEASE, and quickly, darlin'.

Love  ya,

Ellen



Author's Response:

Hey Ellen!

Yes, they are definitely a bunch of hot and horney rich brats and it only gets worse.  I can't reveal who Bella will end up with, but I will say, just when you think she's done, there's more coming.  Emmett will definitely get some screen time in this story and if I end up making it a series like I intend to, he'll have his own story evenutally too.  (And of course I knew he was your favorite!  How could I not?! lol)

Thanks for all the encouragement.

Always,

Keira

Reviewer: Lesmere09 (Signed) · Date: July 12, 2010 08:24 PM · On: Chapter 2

James, Bella and the ice cream were soo cute. How could it all have gone soo wrong? I like your Bella. I like how she's confident and I appreciate that. I can not wait for more. 



Author's Response:

I love writing a more confiedent Bella.  I get so tired of reading her as this whimpy little thing that just cowers to everyone.  I know SM's Bella had some strong points, but most of the Bellas I read are so insecure I just want to shake them! lol  There are also some great ones out there, too though.  Like the Bellas in Edward Wallbanger and Trust In Advertising. 

We'll be going back anf forth between past and present James and Bella and you'll get to see how their entire relationship unforlded.  I hope you enjoy!

Reviewer: Lesmere09 (Signed) · Date: July 11, 2010 06:26 AM · On: Chapter 1

I like this. :) I cant wait for more. 



Author's Response:

Thanks so much for the review!  I'm glad you enjoyed it, I'll be submitting chapter 2 today.

Reviewer: gopher4953 (Signed) · Date: July 11, 2010 06:16 AM · On: Chapter 1

Hey. sweetie!

This has started out great! Love the premise and and the non canon pairings and sharings. Loved the "panty bet"! I'm anxious to find what these spoiled, rich brats do with this school year! I think this is going to be an exciting ride!

Bring it on, darlin', as I need MORE, PLEASE!

Love ya!

Ellen xx



Author's Response:

Hey Ellen!

I thought I'd take a shot at writing some actually Twlight fic, glad you enjoyed the first chapter.  The story will go back and forth between the present time and the summer, so it'll be awhile before all is revealed regarding Bella and James.  I hope you like where I take this story.  Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, I'll be submitting chapter 2 today.

Always,

Keira

 

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