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Reviews For Cullenary Coupling
Reviewer: JenGlasgow (Signed) · Date: September 01, 2010 08:02 AM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness Part One - Pride and Tribulation

I don't normally read the side notes written by the authors but you are hilarious and i enjoy yours almost as much as i'm enjoying your story!



Author's Response:

Hi there JenGlasgow!

Thanks so much for your review! The AN's actually were started, oh goodness, several chapters ahead in the story. I had several readers ask me to write summaries before and after each chapter so that they could keep track of what was going on. And initially, I did not want to do it because if I remind someone of a key point - then to me it waves a red flag that something concerning that key point could happen in the chapter. And that would ruin that whole mystery dealio. But I thought about it and spent time crafting an epic one you'll see several chapters down the road and to my utter shock, they were a hit. They get their own reviews and fans. So I went back into earlier chapters and did smaller versions of them. I'm delighted that you are enjoying the story thus far. Edward is very mopey in Pride and Tribulation but expect the snark to come full on in the next chapter. And I should warn you I have a sick sense of humor. :)

Thanks for making me smile!

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 30, 2010 02:25 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Seventeen - When the Fur Flies

so paula.. the new shaman. well good for her. i hope she doesn't disappoint. not really liking selfish leah. i hope sometime soon charlie and bella learn abt seth. billy needs a beat down.



Author's Response:

Hi there akemi! Thanks for the review and stars! Leah is actually a satire of book bella. I was at another forum and this guy came online and made me laugh when he said that he read the books because his female co-workers badgered him into doing it and as a man reading them he really had a hard time wading through all the mental squeeing that Bella did over how hot Edward was. To him, that got old real fast. So I wondered what if Bella's mental dialog actually was dialog? And thus, Leah in CC was born. Leah in this story is a character that you will either be irritated by throughout the story, or she might grow on you - I've written her so that it's really up to the reader to decide - either way I'm not offended. :) She IS annoying. What I left up for interpretation is that Leah has been so involved with Sam that she's been unintentionally pushing away Bella and the rest of her family. That's another reason why it was so easy for Edward to swoop in and "save" Bella in this story - she felt cut off from the Clearwaters. And yes, Billy does need a beat down. No worries on that front. heh heh. 

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 29, 2010 12:20 AM · On: Chapter 8 - Heart of Darkness - Part Sixteen - Can't a Century Old Vampire be a Moral Degenerate in Peace?

hmmm.. i wonder who the lone wolf is

awesome chapter as always



Author's Response:

Hi there akemi!

Thanks for the review! You'll find out the answer to that question soon. Really soon. :)

Books

 

Starched Shirt Edward is winking at you. 

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 27, 2010 03:02 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Fourteen - Phantasms, Families, and Fantasies

wow!!! this is getting better and better. i knew billy was an ass but now this really prove's it.



Author's Response:

Hi there akemi!

Thanks so much for the review! And the stars! You made me smile. Billy is certifiably insane. Mean as a snake, too. 

Best,

Books

Reviewer: summerc79 (Signed) · Date: August 26, 2010 03:31 PM · On: Chapter Eight: Heart of Darkness - Part Forty-Nine - How to Court Your Wife in Seventeen Syllables

Apologies for the late review. Between work and a few health issues I haven't had that much "leisure" time lately.

That's quite a choice Marcus had to make, and at the hand of his mother!

Poor E, still no break in sight for him. Is it bad to find it ironically funny when Hezekiah tells him the sacrifices he made (I.E. Bella and the bloodlust he feels for her) could have been different?

He cant somehow take comfort in that Marcus's mom seems fond of him though. Although with his lack of good luck, it would probably be better to keep an eye (or both) open. Just in case. Oh, and that's too bad that his shield seems to faulter at times.

And what's that business of waking up without his bride by his side? *pouts* Life's unfair. Shouldn't B have put he rlife on hold while he was asleep? The nerve of that girl!! *end sarcasm*

And uh... the awakening of long lost bodily functions got to be... confusing indeed. AT least he is potty trained. Phew! hahaha

Good little chat E&B had in their not-quite-yet-marital bed. We learnt an interesting thing or 2 there.

Major LOL at the "Bestiality with a squirrel" part!

The 2nd chat between our favourite heroes didn't go down quite as well, did it? So much for nature having a calming effect. Douglas and Grace to the rescue though. Thank God for small blessings. B is not that easily swayed. CCE truly needs magic helpers in his bridal quest.

Skeevy proved to be a good ally to CCE in this chapter. A good level-headed uncle too. Poor Bella, fearing and feeling like she is going to be let down and abandoned again. If only she let herself be convinced that Edward would never let that happen. Anymore. Cos he did. He's an idiot. In love. But an idiot still.

A leopard never changes its spots. So true as far as the denali-educated newborns are concerned. At least they did sho some restraint towards their new mates and the audience around them. Some.

Ah! The Marcus helpline... How much does he charge you think? lol Edward should have the number on speed dial these days. Wisdom often comes from the ancients (Marcus won't be cross with me for making such a statement will he??) Will it hit home that CCE needs to forgive and love himself (I didnt mean THAT way!! Geez... That would be between him and himself... and a few spirits too probably and... Ah! I give up lol) in order to make progree with his Dear Little Bottlecap? That and also that relationships need work (wasn't that lesson covered and supposedly learnt in a previous chapter? I guess we'll put it down tot hat not-100%-vampire-anymore business ;)  )

Hehehe Lingerie expert SSE about to strike again! LOL With his favourite accomplice of course. But shhhhh! Let's keep that quiet. It's a provate matter. All for his Peach benefit. Ummm his Peach's Peaches... uh... yeah...

Loved the whole "since I was the man in this relationship, and everything negative was my fault" part :p Im evil lol

Cute, heartfelt, sincere moment between CCE and Bella in the attic. He's trying, that's for sure. No one can take that from him. OK, he still sometimes put his foot in his mouth, but he's trying...

Oh, and 3 loud cheers for the public announcement of the not-so-fake-real engagement to the family. While CCE was all about the "taming a wild animal" approached, Bella settled for the "rip the bandaid at once" tactic. LOL Effective!

Awesome chapter, hun! As always :)

Looking forward to the next developments of this great adventure!



Author's Response:

Hi there hun, I don't care when I get feedback as long as I get it. :) And I'd much rather you read when you have time and feel well enough to do so. So no worries. Really. You come first. :) And I found it all kinds of amusing that Edward had to learn the hard way that there is a huge difference between personal sacrifice and sacrificing something for the tribe. I wanted to use his sacrifices as a dual-edged weapon of characterization of sorts. They show on one hand how important Bella is becoming to him. But on the other hand, they also add in roadblocks to that relationship. And then there's the additional benefit that the fact he goes so far overboard and chooses things that inconvenience him but have no bearing on the welfare of the tribe....I wanted to show how he's coming out of his self-absorbed phase in bits and pieces. I liked the idea of him waking up and her not being there. And her being with another family member having a chat. I wanted to give Edward and Emmett a chance to bond. And I most definitely wanted to give Edward and his Father a chance to once again show the evolution of their relationship. Edward has started trusting his family bit by bit. 

To me Bella has had a really harsh lesson of late about family. I had a hard time putting myself in her place and finding out when she's in high school that much of her life has been a lie. And also finding out how people she loved made decisions on her behalf - ones that impacted her tremendously without ever giving her a vote in the matter. Kinda wanted to set that up there so she already has a complex by the time Edward comes back into her life. I liked that Skeevy appealed to logic rather than emotion - to her sense of fairness. He knows that time will have to be the proof. But he also knows that people lied to Bella for years without her knowing and that Bella has to develop trust in her instincts again. When you find out that the people you loved the most were the ones who lied to you - then how do you know in the future WHO is safe to trust? That's Bella's deal. 

That point you made about forgiveness. To me it's something that will hit him in phases. If you go back and read Lies Dreams and Schemes (wait about two weeks or so because I'm re-editing the front end at present), you'll see a conversation between Edward and Carlisle that is really important. Carlisle is underscoring the importance of what Marcus just told Edward. So Edward's having this "oh heck" *face-palm* moment as he walks up the stairs and starts his flashback to the HOD arc. Marcus planted the seeds, and Carlisle watered the plant so to speak. 

I wanted to extend the joke from the newborns must die chapter about how everything is the fault of the man - so says Emmett. Rosalie, too. 

I'm delighted that the attic scene has been so well received. I wanted to have him propose to her yet still have that ambivalence going on so we can see the two of them as they learn how to trust and love. I also wanted to pick up where Heartbeats and Lullabies left off with Edward looking at his possessions in trunks he'd never had the courage to open. I liked the idea of the attic being the one place that Edward and Bella could count on to be private and alone and not stuffed with Lost Coven vampires as the house is teeming with them at present. Makes writing a courtship all kinds of awkward. And I'm also happy you enjoyed Bella's attitude about their engagement. Something to keep in mind is that Bella is avoidant of conflict. So to me her flat out announcing it, really is a way to avoid conflict because she's telling Charlie in front of an audience. He can't bellow at her. 

Going back to writing now. :)

Many, many thanks for spoiling me so.

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 25, 2010 12:22 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Thirteen - Hitchcock

GO ALICE!!!
i'm glad edward got some release.now let's work on talking to bella

Author's Response:

Hi there akemi!

I liked the idea of muddying up Alice's character. She protected Edward's privacy and kept her word. But she also put her whole family and most especially Bella at risk to do it. And then there's the fact that she's mated to Jasper and with-held information from him. Her powers don't work around Edward effectively so she took a HUGE risk here. Don't think Edward isn't freaking out about it.

Edward will definitely be working on that whole talking to Bella dealio. Something to keep in mind is that you see just how not quite right he is in the head because he's imagining them oh married and he hasn't really ever bothered to let Bella know he thinks she's cute. 

Best,

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 24, 2010 11:05 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Twelve - Bless me Father for I am Most Definitely Going to Sin

edward can rip my panties off anytime...



Author's Response:

*snorts*

Not this Edward. At least not yet. And Main Edward is tapping me on the shoulder asking me why people keep asking him to rip their panties. From watching re-runs of Tom Jones, he is confused because women have been throwing their undergarments at the poor man, not ripping them. 

Thanks for reviewing. SSE is appropriately horrified. And turned on. Not that he'd admit the second. But still.

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 24, 2010 05:51 PM · On: Chapter 8 - Heart of Darkness - Part Eleven - Weapons of Mass Distraction

awesome!!!



Author's Response:

Thanks so much! That was a hard chapter to write. I thought that it would only make sense for Edward to kinda sorta freak out.

 

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 24, 2010 08:28 AM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Ten - Heartbeats and Lullabies

i love that edward is vulnerable. i can't wait until he realizes that he loves bella.



Author's Response:

Thanks so much akemi! I really wanted an opportunity to show how Edward's emotional world is colliding and collapsing around him and it was Bella's chance to be strong for him. :)

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 23, 2010 04:36 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Nine - Legacy

best one yet. i do have one question though.. did edward fall asleep???



Author's Response:

You'll find out the answer in the next chapter if memory serves. He is taking on more and more human symptoms. But he's a vampire. Thanks for the review!

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 21, 2010 09:06 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Seven - My Queen

*sigh*



Author's Response:

Aw akemi, thanks so much! :)

Books

Reviewer: Twigasmic (Signed) · Date: August 21, 2010 02:28 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Eight: Something Fetid This Way Blows

i like how jacob's character is portrayed in your fanfic, its how i've always thought of him in the books. same with renne and charlie, i never thought of them as good parents and its magnified here. i love your story so far and i am absolutely hooked:)



Author's Response:

Hi there Twigasmic!

Thanks so much! When I initially wrote some scenes with Jacob in that section of the story, a friend of mine, Oxymoronic, looked at one and told me that I needed to remember that there was a huge age difference between Edward and Jacob and that I was initially making Jacob a bit too cartoony. So I went back and tried to put some more thought into why Jacob acts the way he does. Not to excuse his behavior - but to give it some more depth. In my mind, Jacob has had his Father dangling his conditional love over him all his life - saying if you do what I tell you and marry Bella - then I'll approve of you. And that makes Jacob resent Bella, resent his father, and feel alienated. 

And yeah, Charlie will never be the model parent of the year, neither will Renee. :)

Best,

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 21, 2010 11:31 AM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness Part Six - Bonkers

this was a great chapter.



Author's Response:

Thanks akemi!

Either people liked that chapter or it completely creeped them out. I was trying to "show" that Edward was in denial about that whole "almost killed my singer" dealio. So his way of coping with it was to think that if he took "care" of his singer, then that meant he wasn't that much of a fiend, right? So he basically destroys the already destroyed scene of the crime. 

And I wanted to give a glimpse into how his family is coping with his odd behavior. I had loads of fun with Emmett in this chapter.

Thanks so much for the review!

Best,

Books

Starched Shirt Edward is waving at you and winking when he thinks I'm not looking. 

Reviewer: Lillygigglepops (Signed) · Date: August 21, 2010 05:54 AM · On: Chapter 3: Propositions and Practice

Love your story!  Can't stop reading it!!!!  Very entertaining!!!  Thanks for writing it!!!!



Author's Response:

Hi there Lillygigglepops!

Cool pen name. :) Thanks so much for the review! And the stars! I'm overjoyed to hear you are enjoying my sick sense of humor as I present my twisted take on Twilight. :) Thanks for making my day. :)

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 20, 2010 09:54 AM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Five - Dream Edward

dream edward... love it. starched shirt edward is just that stiff!



Author's Response:

Hi there akemi!

Thanks for the reviews! How you seriously spoil me so. :) Remember that Dream Edward is what Bella calls him when she's kinda sorta out of her mind and Edward actually sees him as a) the role he has to play to win her and b) competition. Think back to Deviant. You and I both know that SSE got some pleasure out of that ahem accident. Not that he'd admit it. But still.

:)

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 19, 2010 10:58 AM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Four - Deviant

i love protective edward.



Author's Response:

Thanks so much akemi! I had lots of fun showing his cluelessness and developing feelings in that chapter. I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it. Expect more mayhem.

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 16, 2010 11:34 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness Part One - Pride and Tribulation

really really good.



Author's Response:

Thanks so much akemi! 

Best,

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 16, 2010 02:18 PM · On: Chapter 7: The Webers - Flowers and Pasties for Jesus

em just doesn't know when to shut up. but i love the lug.



Author's Response:

Hi there akemi!

I never bought into the idea that someone who had his skull crushed like a smashed grape by a bear could be turned and come out perfect. Yanno? So in my mind, Emmett has a brain injury that although it did heal to an extent, he has to live with some symptoms - once of which is having no filter at times. I wanted him also to be exceptionally bright - probably one of the smarter ones of the Cullens - you just have to look for it. You'll find out  more about Emmett and get to see him shine in multiple ways in the backstory. :)

Thanks for the review! And the stars!

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 15, 2010 09:27 PM · On: Chapter 5: Indecent Exposure at the Thriftway on Aisle Three: Shameless Hussy Part Three

love love love it!!! mike has a weiner!! lmao!!



Author's Response:

Akemi,

Mike Newton is tapping me on the shoulder and asking me to tell you that he does indeed have a weiner, but he prefers to think of it as Mike the Monster, thank you very much. And he's taking appointments if you would like to star in one of his personal pervy fantasies. No worries, I just face palmed him for you.

Thanks!

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 15, 2010 06:55 PM · On: Chapter 5: Indecent Exposure at the Thriftway on Aisle Three: Shameless Hussy Part Two

even thought she's plotting against them.. i'm glad tanya's trying to help bella



Author's Response:

Tanya will see the light. Eventually. And she most definitely can put on a show. Glad you are enjoying the tale, akemi!

Thanks for spoiling me so.

Best,

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 15, 2010 03:09 PM · On: Chapter 5: Indecent Exposure at the Thriftway on Aisle Three: Shameless Hussy Part One

well at least she has angela as a good friend. that dumb jessica with her selfish thoughts. charlie! hahahaha!!! "Stripper pole?" hahaha



Author's Response:

Charlie is not the sharpest tool in the shed in this story. Yeah, I went there with the stripper pole. Evil, I know. Glad you enjoyed it akemi! Thanks so much!

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 15, 2010 01:58 PM · On: Chapter 4: Homework Was Never Supposed To Be This Much Fun

wow.. poor bella. but then again she might not be mad.



Author's Response:

Hi akemi!

Thanks for the review and stars! For the record, I am an equal opportunity torturer of all my characters. 

:)

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 15, 2010 10:02 AM · On: Chapter 3: Propositions and Practice

since edward is going to trick bella will there be a nessie?



Author's Response:

Hi akemi,

Ordinarily I don't spill plot points. But I will make an exception in this case. I have a line waaay down the road where I mock hybrids. I don't think children should face palm their parents as a way of communicating. And the idea of Edward so protective of Bella to the point of OCD not shrink wrapping his Johnson resulting in Bella getting pregnant? No. I really had a hard time buying into that part of BD. So Nessie will not be in this story. 

Best,

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 14, 2010 11:43 PM · On: Chapter 2: The Bachelor Party: Survival of the B!tchfest - Part Two

that's what that skank gets



Author's Response:

Hi akemi!

I do believe sometimes, just sometimes there is justice in the world. Even if it's a make believe world. Thanks for reviewing. :)

Books

Reviewer: akemi (Signed) · Date: August 14, 2010 10:24 PM · On: Chapter 2: The Bachelor Party: Survival of the B!tchfest - Part One

that sneaky tramp!!!



Author's Response:

Which one, Edward or Tanya. LOL! Thanks akemi for the review.

Tanya is blowing kisses at you. Really.

Books

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