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Reviews For Cullenary Coupling
Reviewer: sweetswirlypop (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 05:33 AM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

I liked the interactions with the Volturi guards. Alec and Jane seem to be useful in the future.. And Bella murmuring scientific names in her sleep?! LOL, genius girl.

Author's Response:

Hi there sweetswirlypop!

Thanks so much! We will definitely see more of Alec and Jane in the future. Glad the Latin entertained you. Not that I can pronounce it, mind you. :)


Jugurtha is blowing kisses at you,



Reviewer: Fitten (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 03:33 AM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Poor Edward, I want to hear his family say how much they love him, its totally sad that he doesn't feel loved and wanted for himself - only as a useful tool to them.  I love that Jasper and Emmett know he's been faking innocence in the wrestling matches - I can't wait for them to call him on it.

Author's Response:

HI there Fitten!

Poor Edward indeed. :) Poor Edward is walking a tight rope with his family. His brothers smell a rat. Jasper is rather tenacious.

Thanks so much for the review! I'm delighted you are enjoying the story. That chapter was hard to write. :)



Reviewer: Ksangi (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 03:03 AM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

It was the Volturi way to be considerate in all things....I get it, the Volturi are kinda like the boy scouts without merit badges.  Cool. 

Please do not turn my Duggie into the next Robert Pasttinson.  I would like us to have a normal life and enjoy Edwards nuts together in peace.

Author's Response:

Douglas the Destroyer - Duggie to you is worried. He wants to know if its his nuts you want, or those of that odd man who is not Main Edward? He has main Edward's nuts. Duggie is confused. :)


You are right, the Volturi don't have the venom tats the ultimate vampire accessory. They are bad but not bad to the bone - not this group.

Thanks for the review!



Reviewer: pclo (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 02:39 AM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Wow. You know, I knew she wasn't going to die. I have read the first part of this story, after all. But I must confess i was worried there for a few minutes that Edward was really going to do her in. That Bella really does have some good preservation instincts, doesn't she.
Great chapter. Thanks for writing.

Author's Response:

Hi there pclo!

If I can make you actually wonder if he was going to do her in, I did my job. :) Many thanks. :)

The way I saw it, literally, her survival came down to dumb luck. She spontaneously decided to kiss him. She decided to be brave and seize life by the horns. She had no inkling that he wanted to kill her.

I'm still beaming good thoughts in your direction. :)

Douglas is waving his nuts at you,


Reviewer: pclo (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 01:19 AM · On: Chapter Eight: Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-One - Fourteen Kinds of F*^ked Up

Hey Books,
Sorry I haven't been around lately. Bad stuff at work. And I have been reading Diana Gabaldon's newest book. Any way, another wonderful chapter here. Bella is not nearly as helpless as she seems, is she. Now all Edward has to do is figure out how to make the Volturi and the lost coven happy. Can't wait to see how he does that. Thanks for writing.

Author's Response:

Hey pclo!

I'm sending good throughts in your direction. I hope RL lets up on you soon and paves way for you to enjoy yourself and your fanfiction habit. :) I wanted to show Bella "dealing" with the realization that she killed someone. I thought she was awfully cavalier in the books at times. I'm glad you enjoyed it. More Edward and Bella coming up. :)



Reviewer: fanficreader83 (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 01:15 AM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

wow... there is always so much going on, and I am always considering what I will comment on in my review... well, I know there was a great deal happening at the beginning of this chapter, I have to focus on the cave... I am not sure I can express it in words but will try.  I could sense edward's decision, especially knowing he had been told he would need to sacrifice something and in knowing this, I was on the rollercoaster ride of emotions with edward... I felt like I was sacrificing something right along with him... but of course, bella does just the thing to pull him out of it, he was always a sucker for any against the flesh time and this was definitely unfamiliar territory, yet oh so good... and I hope edward has a new appreciation for bella's crazy grandmother as she had assured her granddaughter that the earth's movement would indicate a very important event in her life, an event that edward was glad to learn, even if he doesn't know that he reciprocates just yet!  can't wait for more as I am sure edward will still be enjoying his new found use for his lips!!!  ;)

Author's Response:

Hi there fanficreader83!

Thanks so much. You just made my night. I had a very hard time writing that section. I wanted it to be a complete fluke that Bella lived. She kissed him which was probably the 3rd bravest thing she's ever done in her life (behind killing the bad guy, and standing up to the mob and staying by Angela's side). So I'm a big fan of dramatic irony. The problem with Edward is that he doesn't think that Bella really loves HIM. She loves the Pretend Me. So right now, he's floored that she loves the Pretend Me, but his self loathing is going to kick in and try to explain it away. But don't worry, we'll fix that. Soon. Next chapter starts with kissing and I've left a teaser on the thread. :)

many, many thanks!


Reviewer: Fleuritup (Signed) · Date: October 13, 2009 12:40 AM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Finally some lip locking! thank you, and you have no idea how much i LOVED it when edward took charge. and let the vancouver know  who's boss. yeah that made my day. i loved that jas seemed to be really insightful in this chapter. edward seems to be shocked at how little he really is able to hide from people. bella keeps dropping bombs on him and i thought everything was perfectly timed in that cave, i honestly was wondering what he was going to do but then when i realized he was going to take her life im like romeo and juliet the emotions were just beautifully written and i honestly was like come on edward find some excuse to keep stalling and bella was just in time. i noticed before how that coven didnt help her in serious times of need and i loved it when the others realized it. i also admit i liked how Doc was tatooed with a wolf on his hand when he touched the shield. i was and still am grossed out that he thinks her vomit smells good and that she has splended earwax or something like that. carlisle was brillant in how he handled the volturi.

Ouote"There was a new order in town. A new game plan. School was once again in session. " ..."Tanya in particular had been quite the busy bee sleeping her way to the top. "you mean sexing her way to the top.

i'm now looking forward to more awesome kisses that causes caves to tremble and fragments to crash around edward and bella.  i loved the description of the cave i could picture it and iwas beaituful thank you for another fantasy place to spend with edward.

I also noticed that leah seemed even more like an imbecile she kinda reminded me of lauren. i mean i feel bad for her loss but then her accusing her cousin of stealing her man when her cousin was clearly disqusted with him and then her saying shed never forgive any of them. i mean i understand that people deal with grief in their own way but  she just seems like a bit much. and what was the story paula told her, was she lying because i dont remember that one. i mean i remember something about her having to find a way to miscarry because her second child would kill the first or did i get that wrong. ok i'll go back and reread.  sorry for the long comment.

Author's Response:

Hi there Fleuritup!

You NEVER have to apologize for leaving me long reviews. Seriously. I love hearing feedback about what struck you in the chapter. So thanks so much for sharing your thoughts with me. :) I've been trying to show the evolution of Edward in what to me makes sense. He stood up to the coven because his back was absolutely against a wall, and it was probably the hardest thing he's ever done. Jasper - it is important to me to "show" in this arc of the story that he earned every bit of that reputation for being ruthless and fearsome on the battlefield. His family has never seen this side of him. And after getting smacked around by Genevieve and being deeply traumatized at having his memories (some of them) returned to him, he's starting to rally.


And you are absolutely right that the VC's actions concerning Bella are curiously inconsistent. Next chapter starts with kissing. Swear. I've left a teaser on the thread on the AU forum.

I wanted, in my portrayal of Leah to "show" how people would have reacted to Book Bella if she had verbalized her constant litany of thoughts on the hotness of the Adonis marble perfect dazzling stone-like deity she dated. And if you read up on cognitive dissonance - Leah is mourning right now and drugged to the gills on pain killer and she's trying to reconstruct her memory of the events as best she can. She also has a concussion which makes things muzzy. It's easier for her to think that she's been betrayed than to face up to the fact that in her last moments on earth, Leah said such hateful things to her cousin. Worse, it hasn't hit Leah yet, but it will, her role in why Emily and Jennifer died. Leah has a very tough road ahead of her and she's going to do some growing up. But it won't be easy. Paula was telling her the truth about the baby. She miscarried after falling. And you were right about the whole her second child would have killed her first. Genevieve warned her of it. I initially wrote that Genevieve pushed her down the stairs, but even I couldn't go there.

Thanks so much for your support of my story.



Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 11:52 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Four - Deviant

I am in awe of this chapter.  What a wonderful experience for all, even if Bella will never remember it.  I hope they can get her room fixed before she or Charlie comes home.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

Thanks so much! I think you will find Bonkers highly entertaining - that's what it's about. :)



Reviewer: elphabacy35 (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 11:35 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Always good to see Douglas!

So, I am in a turkey haze from Thanksgiving (I'm Canadian), and I almost waitied to read this until tomorrow because I was afraid I would not be able to pay attention, but now I am so glad that I did not wait because I would have missed that amazing kissing!!!!

It was totally worth the wait.

That's all I have tonight....

Thanks for a great chapter:)


Author's Response:

Hi there Stacy!

Happy Thanksgiving! You'll have to tell me what that's all about. :) I'm delighted you enjoyed the chapter. I was nervous about posting it. Starched Shirt Edward is frantically waving at you. He wants you to know he has roses for you.

Emmett is winking at you,


Reviewer: Mav (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 11:34 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

That was... amazing!  You really had me thinking, "Oh, no! Bella's neck is gonna go crunch an' Edward is gonna do that whole drop dead thing and it's gonna suuuuck!" But then you heroically saved the day with the power of human hormones... do vampires have hormones?  Or, if Edward's heart kinda works again sporatically, does that mean that he's got fresh batches of human hormones coursing through his body? And that plus the whole virgin-for-a-century gig has combined to make him the horniest eternally-17-year-old on the planet EVER? So all Bella has to do is kiss him and he turns into a pile of slobbering goo?  But I digress...

Anyway, I'm glad he finally put on his big-boy pants and opened up that can o' whoop-tushie on Eve and her peeps.  Boyfriend has WAY too many people yanking his chain and giving him completely obscure hints, followed up oh-so-helpfully by, "That's not what we meant!"  Grace should kick all their asses just for being obfuscating dillweeds.  She's the only one who's really been consistently useful... like duct tape.

My rambling point being, love it - want more - you rock!

Author's Response:

Hi there Mav!!!

Thanks so much! And can I just say you rock more? :)  I think that given Edward has all these weird human symptoms that hormones are most definitely raging through his system. Not that he would know what it is. :) And you are right, Edward has way too many people standing in line to make him their pinanta. It was about time he seize the sword and take a stand.

Grace has only begun to kick ass. Seriously. :)

Grace is flapping a fin at you,


Reviewer: Kaydence (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 11:16 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Holy sacred vomit sniffing ear tonguing Bella loving almost murdering don't mess with my family I will starve you bastards Edward batman!!!! I think that sums up my thoughts on this AMAZING chapter.

Author's Response:

Oh my sweet baby Jesus Kaydence,

I'm wiping away tears here, I'm laughing so hard. What an awesome review!!!!! I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter.

And hon, I have more fun with Edward tucked up my sleeve. Lots more. :) *evil grin*

Jugurtha is wagging his tongue at you, in a purely respectful manner, of course,



Reviewer: M Logan (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 10:55 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Earwax??? Ewww!  

Okay, I love this story.  I am always excited when a new chapter is posted.  I know that it will be a long, detailed chapter.  You really put a lot in it.  It really is like a soap opera!

Author's Response:

Hi there MLogan!

Yes, I went there with earwax. I wanted to make my first kiss scene unlike any other I had read in fanfic - and I've read a lot. So I've never read an ode to ear wax. And to me it just showed Edward's obsession with her. Remember, her vomit to him smells delicious. Thanks for your feedback. This chapter was a bitch to write. :)

Jugurtha is blowing kisses at you,



Reviewer: Rgwmnks (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 10:23 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

The more I read oof this the more I want to read. Selfish I know but who cares? Not me :o)  As Always I LVOE IT! Bout damn time right.

Author's Response:

Hi there Rgwmnks!

Thanks so much for your kind words! And why do you feel selfish? I don't think that's selfish to want to keep reading. :)

And as for the bout time, I'm guessing you meant the kiss? Or Edward growing a pair? Hmmm?


Douglas is waving at you.


Reviewer: killeen (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 10:16 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

I was so excited this afternoon when we had a new chapter up, YAY!!!


I'm so glad we got to the kissing part - I was starting to get a little anxious!!!  But it was worth it, even if the ear wax comment was a little icky.  haha.


loved it, as always.


how many chapters do you see the story going?  it doesn't seem like we're anywhere close to where we started in the other storyline just yet.  Not that I'm complaining, you can keep going as long as you like. :)

Author's Response:

Hi there Killeen!

people either love the ear wax line or hate it. It could have been worse, you know, I could have him writing odes of poetry to her farts. :) Seriously. I'm sick enough to go there.

When I first wrote the HOD arc, it was about three chapters and it sucked. And I made the mistake of telling readers, "Oh we'll only be here for a little while." And then I had to go and change my mind. The lesson I learned from that when I had understandably pissed off readers was not to make promises that I couldn't keep. I have about I don't know maybe 600 pages of a draft that I have not posted. The way I write is that I carve off a section at a time, look at my whimpering outline from hell, and the polish and expand where necessary. So I have no idea how long this story will be. I'm letting it tell itself. The one thing I will warn you is that the HOD arc will not be predictable in many ways. And we also have the section to cover with the wedding and the honeymoon and all that conflict to work out. :) And you're right, it doesn't seem like we are close to that other story arc, but we are getting considerably closer. That's about as far as I'll commit. :)

As ever, thanks so much for your continuing support of my story.


Jugurtha is waving his tongue at you, Gene Simmons style.


Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 08:59 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Three - EdBargo

What a great chapter.  I loved how Edward is takingcare of Bella and the other girls at the school.  Gianni was taken down several pegs and I think it bolstered Edward's ego even if he wasn't looking for it or recognized it.

Author's Response:

Thanks so much Lady Dragona!

I had a lot of fun writing about Edward basically freaking his family out by becoming physically aggressive with mortal men in a short amount of time. Territorial much? And you're right it probably did help Edward's ego. :)


Edward is blowing kisses at you,



Reviewer: Merrisol (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 07:36 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Ahhh, here we are again. You must have figured out by now that I review while I read. I have to. There is just too much I want to comment on and even I don't have a memory that good!

Love the refresher before each chapter, although I must say that I am better at remembering what is going on and who everyone is now. Maybe it is because the doctor upped my meds. Go figure.

The first thing that absolutely blew my mind was this sentence: 

"It felt like I was a blindfolded fool who stumbled into bales of cotton, never accurately perceiving his surroundings."

It just spoke to me for some reason. I think it totally sums up Edward's feelings. While he is confused as hell most of the time (and who among us is not?), he really has a safe, comfortable place to fall for once in his life. His safe, comfortable place is Bella. No matter what atrocities happen around them or to them, when he touches Bella he goes to a safe place in his mind. She touches and heals his heart; a heart he thought had long ceased to exist.

Not sure why I had to ramble about that but ....

Tanya will be a pervert for all eternity, and it seems that she is getting less picky with time. Not sure that is a good thing. "How 'bout a kiss, oh stinky one?" I about pissed my pants on that one. Is nothing sacred to this woman? Apparently not.

The ongoing discusion about brassieres was just too funny. Those two bobbleheads that live in his brain should be a story themselves. How long does it take to distract a bobblehead? Two seconds if you give him a Panache catalog! LOL Can you imagine the antics if they got ahold of a Frederick's of Hollywood catalog??? OMFG

I swear sometimes I really question Edward's sanity. The things this poor boy thinks in his head just cracks me up. He doesn't want her to be considered a thief for removing a rock from a National Forest, even though she has committed a far more sinful act when she killed someone. I almost said, "I wonder what goes on in his head?" but, duh, I know! Oh, and the ... "Bastard that I am." was just creamy goodness.

Well, holy fucking shit! All hell broke loose ... the Volturi (hate them) ... the cave (loved it) and the hot springs (woohoo). Then you had to go and scare me shitless by making think Edward was actually going to kill Bella! I mean seriously, WTF? Is it not enough that I suffer in silence while waiting for this poor boy to get a grip on his "problem" but then you heap onto my suffering by adding the whole "I have to kill her" bit. OMG!!

Fortunately, I did not have to suffer for long, as you redeemed yourself when Bella pulled the "seductive smooching" card. Kudos for that, by the way. Whew! I think Edward thoroughly enjoyed it, I know I did! She is a naughty little vixen, isn't she? She has no sense of self-preservation, but what a way to go out!

So, now I will ponder this recent change of events, including the musings of Sequoyah. He really should have been a bit more clear in his instructions. I blame him for my almost fatal heart attack. The bastard.

Sorry Douglas didn't make an appearance. I have a feeling he will be popping back in from time to time.

As always, I was blown away by your crazy, creative mind. I am definitely going to look for a Frederick's catalog for the two bobbleheads and I'm sending Douglas an assorted nut basket. He is a funny little thing. Love you, love the story ... I just love, love, love!!


Author's Response:

Hi there Merrisol!

My dear, thank you so much for your amazing review. I had to scrape my jaw off the floor. :) You spoil me so. :)

I had the image of Edward stumbling around a barn filled with bales of cotton having no idea where he was when I wrote that sentence. Glad you liked it. :) And I've never really thought of Bella as his "safe place" that was eloquent. The thing to keep in mind about Tanya is that Edward has a very biased view of her. She is sexually active and makes no apologies for it. That alone is enough to set Edward off with his Victorian sensibilities. But from Edward's perspective she's a floozy. From Tanya's perspective, she's used to having every man in the world fawning over her. That's her reality.

The panache catalog on line is interactive. It could keep SSE busy for hours with all those windows he has to click.

I find your take on Bella's behavior and Edward's odd reasoning interesting. Do you think she sinned when she threw her knife to defend Edward's life? St. Thomas Aquinas would argue that her intention was to preserve life, and therefore killing the man was moral. I do understand, and respect that others might have a different view on the situation. When I was writing that scene I thought it was ironic that he was "stealing" from her by taking the rock - and trying to engage in impression management at the same time. In Edward's mind, the public would think they'd been snatched by the serial killers that were after Bella and Angela. His family would know the truth because Edward left the shoes and stick for them to find.

And yeah, I was cruel to have him do that I'm going to have to kill her to save her. I've been planning it from day one of the story. :) The sad thing about Bella is that she really had no idea how close to dying she came. She spontaneously kissed him and next to killing that man, it was the second bravest thing she's ever done. Maybe the third, given she stood up to the gang as well to protect Angela.

The whole point of the test was to see how Edward would think of the term sacrifice. They were ambiguous on purpose.

And just for you, I'm including a shot of Douglas. That's me, Books the purveyor of squirrel porn.

He is waving almonds in your honor, as am I.




Reviewer: oncebitten (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 06:52 PM · On: Chapter Eight - Heart of Darkness - Part Thirty-Two - The Sword of Damocles

Hi books,

      FINALLY!!!!! He was all I'M gonna have to kill her to save her one minute , and the next the were having earth moving kissing match!!! I love this chapter .It was haert braking when he took her to the cave and thinking about how she was seeing everythin for the last time ,I was in tears . Then they were kissing and I WAS LIKE oh yeah!!   You rock ;) oncebitten


Author's Response:

Hi there oncebitten!

You just made my day, hon. Thanks so much for your review. Thank you as well for your support of this story. :)

Starched Shirt Edward is blowing multiple kisses at you,

You totally rock,


Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 06:04 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness - Part Two - Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to Know

I loved this chapter.  I think that it shows more depth and character development.  I think it is wonderful how Edward is caring for his singer.  I just hope that he realizes that he is doing it as much for her as he is for himself.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

The thing I am trying to argue here is that Edward as a result of trauma has created a delusional universe. He has never dealt with the trauma of his turning, and most particularly, he's never faced up to what he did beyond waking up and realizing it was wrong. His response has been to almost go back in time and act as if he's 17 - the perfect 17 year old. He does not remember what love feels like, and he literally has no idea that when his parents say they love him, what precisely that means. He thinks if they knew the real him that they would kick him out. So what you will be seeing in these first few chapters is that Edward in the pursuit of sensitizing himself to his singer, has boundary issues. He invades her privacy on almost every level, justifying that it's for her own good. In a way, I suppose he's right - it keeps her walking with a pulse. :)

Thanks for the review and the feedback. I look forward to seeing what you think about the story. :)



Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 04:24 PM · On: Chapter 8: Heart of Darkness Part One - Pride and Tribulation

I truely loved this chapter.  Getting the back backstory of Edward and why he is the way he is was wonderful.  I look forward to you HOD arc.


Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

Thanks so much! I love writing from EPOV and I've had tons of fun with it. I never really felt like his self-loathing was fleshed out in the books, and I thought he fell in love far too easily for someone as messed up as he was. Hence, the heart of darkness arc. :)



Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 02:56 PM · On: Chapter 7: The Webers - Flowers and Pasties for Jesus

This was sweet and scary at the same time.  Emmett does sometimes need to learn when to shut his mouth.  Poor Ben - He is definately in the hot seat now.  Tanya was very helpful I think :)

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

I had lots of fun with Emmett. In my mind, it's just not possible for someone with a squashed by a bear skull to come out of that completely intact - a perfect vampire. So I've made him verbally impulsive. For him it's not a matter that he needs to learn to shut his mouth - he cant' help it sometimes. It's that he needs to be aware of his communication and how it impacts others.

Thanks so much for the review. Tanya was hilarious making eyes at Ben. :)



Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 02:33 PM · On: Chapter 6: Lies, Dreams, and Schemes

I think that Sam has a good head on his shoulders.  I also think that Tanya has more up her sleeve.  I wonder if Carlisle is aware of what is going to happen tonight and what Edward's reaction is going to be.  I know that I am looking forward to it.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

Carlisle has always known that Tanya has a thing for Edward. She hasn't been as aggressive about it as she would prefer out of respect for Carlisle. And you are right, Tanya most definitely has more up her sleeve. Carlisle would be amused at Tanya's attempts because he knows she doesn't have a prayer.



Reviewer: twilightluver6 (Signed) · Date: October 12, 2009 04:52 AM · On: Prologue: Bella, Sex, and Privacy


Author's Response:

Many thanks, twilightluver6!






Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 11, 2009 10:55 PM · On: Chapter 5: Indecent Exposure at the Thriftway on Aisle Three: Shameless Hussy Part Three

What a chapter.  I think that Tanya did a good job on giving them something new to talk about.  Mike will never be the same.

Author's Response:

Thanks so much Lady Dragona!


You have two more chapters and then the story is going to change drastically and you'll think I'm on drugs. We're switching to Edward's POV. And he's snarky. Really snarky. And gloomy at first but he'll lighten up and get funny soon.

I had loads of fun with Tanya creating a bigger scandal. And Mike newton - if you think what I did to him is bad there, the second, third, and fourth chapters of the heart of darkness arc should have you in heaven. :)



Reviewer: Lady Dragona (Signed) · Date: October 10, 2009 11:46 PM · On: Chapter 5: Indecent Exposure at the Thriftway on Aisle Three: Shameless Hussy Part Two

I loved how poor Edward had to squirm with Charlie.  I am glad that Tanya helped him out.  I think Charlie has a very active imagination.  That might cause them problems in the future.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

Thanks so much for the review. You are most perceptive about Charlie. :)

Tanya is waving her fingertips at you,


Reviewer: Fleuritup (Signed) · Date: October 10, 2009 12:43 AM · On: Prologue: Bella, Sex, and Privacy

Ok, im brining up multiple subjects in this review so i apologize in advance, and please forgive my spelling. im wondering if edward will have these powers forever, i hope not, i dont want him glowing all the time. and i forgot to ask about the families scent disappearing. when edward touched the package alices scent dissappeard. im wondering why that is, i mean i can see that edward and bella are masked in whatever the violet gorgon or young to me old power did but how does it have the ability to erase someone elses scent who isnt cloaked by the purple light or have the falcons on them? i love how even though charlie felt gratitude for the cullen boys rescuing his daughter he still managed to get edwards name wrong edwin or edmund i think. can you please bring out more stupidity from the newborns. i will never get over that girl putting her breast up to the shield  and ooing in pleasure that was freakin hilarious.


oh and this is off topic but i was on your author page here and i only see this story. i'm seriously surprised that you dont have anything else posted. please tell me you will be writting another story after you finish this one or at least have worked on another story. you cannot expect us to be satisfied with just one submission you have got so much talent that it kinda seems unfair that you dont have anything else posted. 

now that whole imprinting thing please dont get me wrong but i found it completely disqusting in twilight. i mean teens were falling in love with babies and others left the ones they claimed to love for their relatives. im not for keeping it in the family that is just sick. i know jacob said that he would love renesme in that way when she got older but i kept thinking of pedophilia.

it was really interesting to have it flipped around and it be considered something that was like a freak of nature. and frowned upon when same had that gene or mutation for imprinting, but edward has a singer and its considered something specifically made for him by nature and kinda considered a gift. (ultimate feast would be accurate, if he dinned on her.)   he really is stuck between a rock and  hard place because sam knows emily was everything to him in that moment and he killed her by accident, and then he has leah and his immediate rejection ruined their relationship and his child died as a result of his lack of control so he lost love on two accounts and his offspring... i thought it was jacob that you didnt like? but i see why you made that happen so that he would understand lee's actions, and then jasper was able to have that talk with him.

ok back on topic,  i also like that despite everything edward is still shy and tells himself that he and his girl have a great relationship especially when she is unconcious and they dont have to talk. saying thats comfortable silence. i might be the only one in thinking this but i feel that even though i loved edward in twilight i feel that they confessed their love too quickly and just were completely devoted and not really knowing each other. but i guess im contradicting myself because im always asking when are they gonna be official in this story despite the fact that it takes time to build real relationships. i feel bad for finding it funny that whenever edward remindes himself or someone of his status as a doctor he always includes twice professional. as if its an excuse for him to get away with peaking at bella. bella also must be really humbled to have ppl changing her clothing all the time and not mentioning it. i mean thats gotta be kinda awkward after awhile always waking up in different clothing, (waking up in edwards arm cant ever be considered awkward sorry).

P.S. i'm confused when edward told bella noone had ever risked their lives to defend him like that im like hasnt his whole family been doing that since he met bella. all in attempts to help him protect the "his love,one he pretends to be in love with" does he not see the sacrifices they've been making, i know he is going through alot but so is his family all for he and bellas benefit. i was also shocked and confused when him looking at his soul. it was just as black as jaspers, or did i read that wrong, and i dont understand that because i know he killed some people but jasper really killed lots of people so shouldnt their be a difference. or does edward have some white spots whereas jasper only has one? forgive all my questions, i just want to be on the same page as far as understanding the basics.

Author's Response:

Hi there Fleur,

I don't have a standard policy on "you can only ask one question" or "you must stay on topic" in terms of my reviews so please don't feel the need to apologize. Thanks so much for supporting my story. If I haven't answered a question to your satisfaction, please feel free to PM me.

First, this is the first bit of fiction I've ever written. That's why you don't see any other stories posted on my author page. Aside from some beginning satires, I don't have anything to post. I have been so busy with this story, and beta-ing for others that aside from some general outlining, I haven't really written anything else. If the muses strike me, then I will. :) Swear.

Second, one of the things you have to keep in mind when you are thinking about CC Edward is that things that make perfect sense to him, don't necessarily translate to rational people like you and I as remotely logical. Edward sincerely thinks his family will ditch him if he becomes too much of a burden, or if they learn his secret. And he has never been in any kind of physical peril before - so Bella really is the first person to go and risk his/her life for his sake.

Third, I was not a big fan of imprinting, and agree with you on the disgust factor. I understand the concept in nature like when you have a dog that adopts kittens and such. But that is in a parental-non-sexual sense. The idea of Jacob raising his wife completely creeps me out. Imprinting on infants and toddlers was something that I found extremely disturbing, particularly as she had characterized Emily as rejecting Sam and being mauled as a result of it. So I never found it anything but one-way unrequited obsession. The difference that you have between Edward and Sam is that although Edward is certainly pulled towards Bella - Bella has a choice in the equation. I turned it into a freak of nature in my story because that was the initial way it was presented in the books, as something that was so rare, they had to consult the oldest elders they could find who remembered stories of it, but all said it was rare. So to have it happen three times.....I found not the best storytelling device since she never explained "why" imprinting worked aside from 3 different contrasting reasons. I've used imprinting in this story in two ways: one to show the tragedy of it, and two, to show the manipulative side that Billy and Jacob Black seem to think that it has. Billy Black genuinely thinks that he can "force" Jacob to imprint on Bella. That it will happen. That is why he has always pressured his son to marry Bella but has never even attempted to get them to spend time with each other. To Billy it's not necessarily.

In CC Sam hasn't really had time to register what he "really" felt for Emily. He's simply like someone who has been smacked across the head bad enough to have a concussion and is still sitting around registering that his head really hurts. He has not had time to process anything beyond he can't believe that he accidentally killed not one, but two of Leah's cousins and that he beat Leah, and caused her to miscarry their child. Sam is in a world of hurt. I don't have anything against the character of Sam. I wanted to show a tragedy. I am not a big fan of book Jacob, true. So my portrayal of him in this story is probably as a result of that. I wanted to show him being creepy but to show the human reasons for why he acted the way he did (without excusing his behavior).

Edward and Bella are both painfully shy in this story - a type of shyness that in their cases won't really go away because neither one of them has worked to overcome it. In both cases there are hereditary factors that explain why each character behaves the way he/she does when talking (or not) talking to others. You will see them become more confident with each other over the course of the story, but they will always be shy people. So Edward telling himself that he has a great relationship with Bella while she's unconscious is the shy person inside of him complaining that he really does not enjoy the way this talking business makes him feel. It's nerve-wracking. And something to also keep in mind is that the whole basis of CC Edward's thinking is to find a way to rationalize his behavior -even when he's out of line - so that it makes sense to him. So you are right, he's not peeking at her like a pervert, he's a doctor, and he's just doing what he was trained to do in ensuring that she's healthy. Right? I also am a big fan of irony which is why I have Edward commenting that Jacob is a stalker.

Hope that answered your questions. :)

Douglas is raising an almond in your honor.


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