Once again Edard fails to undersatnd that Bella needs to be able to choose her future.  He needs to let her make the choice on the whole mortality issue.  I think that he is trying though.  He just needs help in figuring out how to let her understand his point of view without scaring her and then he needs to try to understand hers.  I think that might be the more scarry of the two personally.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

You are right. :) The way I see it is that behavior that was considered normative in Edward's generation between men and women - would NOT be considered normative now. In his day, it was considered "normal" for the husband to make major decisions about the welfare of the family and inform the family members. Women couldn't vote when he died. So it doesn't really occur to Edward at this point that she should have a vote. He'll get there. :)

Best,

Books

What a rollicking good time that was! That would make such a cool movie scene!

Help, why does Bella say "please" to Carlisle re' the locket? Or something else?

The part with Eve and her mate was heartbreaking.

How Jasper, Alice, et al, will patch things up is hard to conceive. What a tangled web that Jasper didn't really weave. He's had such a rough life at times, and it continues.

Holy murderer of aphids Edward! For whatever I don't care what the heck it is reason, that must have been so hard for Bella to hear him say he'd rather she die. She seems to have already forgiven him some, or at least understood his point of view (not condemning her), since she does hold and squeeze his hand. I just know you're not done with that yet.

I cannot wait to see how you get from here to the first part of the story. That is gonna be so fun! Not all fun I know, but watching you weave the tale is very enjoyable. There is such a promise of more to come. E&B have a long way to go.

P.S. Yep, finally made it to twilighted just to review your story. :-) Does one usually just review either here or on ff, or copy the review to both places? Yep, dumb question (and yeah, there are dumb questions).

Author's Response:

Hi there CindyWindy!

Welcome to twilighted! I'm stoked that you enjoyed the chapter as I have never written a battle scene and that was not easy. :) And you are the only person so far to catch that "Please" from Bella so I'll tell you. She was begging him to change her. She heard every word and knew Edward wouldn't, so she was asking Carlisle in that word to either a) change her because she was in so much pain and feared she would die, or b) help bring Edward around. She was essentially begging him for help with their relationship because she knew she was in over her head. And Carlisle totally got it. Edward did not. 

I'm glad that Eve's death struck a nerve. I wanted to "show" how despite her loving Liam - she was happy with her mate. I also wanted to show it as a contrast with Jasper/Alice/Annie-Victoria. You're totally right on Jasper having a tough life. To me, he's had a far tougher road to hoe (pardon the pun) than Edward. And in my mind he's boat loads stronger than Edward.

And you are right in that it was devastating for Bella. Her squeezing his hand at the end of the chapter in Edward's mind was a sign that things were going well. To Bella it was her way of trying to "show" him that she loves him. He really ripped her heart out by refusing to change her. Bella assumed that he would change her so they could be together. She never asked. And Edward for his part was all about avoiding having that discussion in the first place. I would not make the assumption that because she's squeezed his hand that he's forgiven. It certainly meant that in the past (when he made that tactless comment when she vomited the first time). It doesn't mean that now. Bella's not unforgiving by nature - but she does hold onto hurt - and since she doesn't sit down and talk things through with people she either mentally excuses their behavior (think back on her telling Edward that her father always wanted a son and loves Jacob more than he loves her and that she doesn't blame him for it - because he's spent more time with Jacob than with her) or she avoids them.

I'm glad you are excited about the rest of the story. We are definitely going to be moving towards that end. Coming up next.

I have some readers who cut and paste their reviews into both sites, which I'm always flattered by, although they don't have to do it. I have other readers who will write one comment on one site, and another on the other. Do whatever you are comfortable with doing - I'm just ecstatic I got a review in the first place. :) And there is no such thing as a dumb question. :)

Thanks so much for your feedback,

Starched Shirt Edward is blowing a kiss at you,

Books

Intense battle scene.  Thank you for your throughness.  Jugurtha rocks!

Author's Response:

Hi there Cullen Concession!

I've never written a battle scene, before so thank you very much for your feedback. :) I was kinda sorta nervous about posting it. :)

 

Jugurtha thinks you rock, too.

He's throwing trout lilies at your feet.

Best,

Books

What a chapter.  The trip home and the MRI.  Poor Edward all that brain damage from using the powers.  He sure is in a catch 22.  I love that he took her to his special hideout.  What a great house.  It sounds close to perfect.  He is doing much better with talking.  He might figure this out yet.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

Thanks! I wanted to give Edward multiple places that he goes to in order to "show" how isolated his life has been even while living as a Cullen. His existence in my mind consisted of going to school, pretending to belong to his family for an hour or two afterwards and then leaving the house to afford the couples privacy. Every night. For decades. And he would return in time to change for school and start it all over again. And a main theme of the wolfpire storyline has been "power requires sacrifice" so in order to use the powers, Edward has to experience pain. It's a balance, to me.

I modeled the house after one a friend of the family owned, He had cathedral ceilings in it and a wall of glass and it literally was like walking into a treehouse encased in glass. And the bedrooms were built downstairs against the side of the hill. Strange looking house on the outside, gorgeous inside. They could eat and watch deer graze.

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Books

Um, wow.  These last two chapters have been doozies.  You know that I have a partiular fondness for CC Jasper and Alice, but there is no way I could have ever seen this coming.  How incredibly original!  You've woven every character into the story so far, and most of them in unique but ultimately canon-ish ways (or in many cases, better than canon ways!).  But Victoria...his wife?!?  Fantastic.  You feigned with the allusion to "Big Love" Alice, but then knocked it home with Jasper instead.  How to deal with the emotional onslaught with his Civil War era sensibilities.  Love it!  I must admit though, I am a little confused when it comes to Alice and James...were they really, or was he just working the angle?  I've got my fingers crossed for an inside look at the conversation that is sure to come between Jasper and Alice.  Hell, I'll even beg for it.  Just a *ahem* taste...?

And of course Edward kisses like that.  But that does not excuse him for his behavior.  No girl wants to hear that her newly bethrothed would rather her be dead than with him forever.  I really expected "the kiss" to be the turning point when he finally realized that it wasn't just about the scent, but it seems he still has a way to go.  I really, really hope, nonconfrontational style aside, that Bella does not let him off that easy.

I love this story.  There's just no other way to say it.  Wonderful!

Author's Response:

Hi there June!

I am delighted that I managed to surprise you. :) *evil grin* I wanted Annie to literally whallop Jasper over the head to the point where his tact and diplomacy literally went out the window - as did everyone else's because they all just froze. I have no intention of writing this as a love triangle in the traditional sense. Jasper is mated to Alice. Period. Jasper when alive loved Annie with all his heart. He "sacrificed" her by literally leaving her alone after being turned because he thought if he acted like his family was not important that was the only way he could protect them. It never occurred to him that she had been turned. And when he returned to the family mansion and found her grave, it broke his heart. He turned away from fighting because he saw that his sacrifice had been in vain. So her showing up and saying she's been searching the earth for him for over a century? Awkward. And to me it doesn't make sense to devalue his love for Annie. I never bought into that bit that SM did with imprinting of having the men "forget" their feelings of love for anyone else. Jasper loves Annie. He's fully mated to Alice. There is no decision that needs to be made. And he has no intention of insulting his first wife by asking her to "share" him. So, yeah, he's up a creek without a paddle. Because Annie has no intention of letting the other woman have him.

James is a lying scumbag. He was never married to Alice. He saw her at the asylum and her blood sang to him. Benedict turned her when he did to save her from James. James burned down the asylum in a bid to snatch her. He's been looking for her off and on ever since. You will at some point see that conversation between Alice and Jasper. I'll try to fit it in and if I have to, I'll make it a one-shot. But I promise you'll see that. Scout's honor.

The kiss for Edward most certainly made an impression. But he hasn't figured out how it worked and why. He hasn't had time to process it, and he's more than irritated that the Quileute elders took that power from him. How does he explain to Bella that he can no longer, ahem, perform like that? It's not you. It's me. Seriously. Swear. I'm not lying. This time.

Edward in his mind is completely justified in insisting that she stay human for several reasons. They'll be outlined soon but I don't mind sharing a few as they've already been articulated. First, the birds really do work now. Any one who bites her will be torn to pieces. So even if he wanted to, he doesn't see how she could be turned. Second, Bella pukes at th scent of blood. How, then would she feed? The algae is drying up, there's no guarantee that she could even tolerate it given her history of allergies to mold. Those are a few. He has more. Then there's the selfish side of him that simply balks because he's been told that she would lose her scent. (and she will) if turned. And he firmly believes that since her scent is what allows him to heal and to take succor, that it would make his existence miserable to be without it. That's the selfish bastard part of him that is in denial. Bella will not be letting him off easy. Promise. I'm also not going to write her as being a bitch because to me that doesn't flow with her character.

As ever, thanks so much for your review. :)

Best,

Books

Bella is waving at you, trout lily in hand.

Haha. I love that carlisle got called a pretty boy. That made me laugh. I also liked the whole edward calling pheonix ugly. That was another laughing point.

I really hope edward pulls his head out soon and decides to change bella! Great battle in the chapter though, this was just a great chapter altogether but I don't need to tell you that though because they're all great chapters!! I'll be watching for the next update to find out if bella is going to talk to edward again! I hope its coming soon!

Author's Response:

Hi there smiles!

Thanks for the review! I wanted to point out the irony that Edward calls Carlisle, "Father" when in physical age terms, Carlise is only 23, and Edward 17. And only Edward would be arrogant enough and clueless at the same time to call Phoenix ugly. Phoenix is like the big bad wolf in the immortal world. And Edward is blithely calling him ugly. If you re-read Lies, Dreams, and Schemes, in the front arc of the story, you'll see that Bella is still human. So he's not changing her any time soon. Bella and Edward will talk next chapter. Swear. :)

Best,

Books

Well, Bella's a smart girl.  Surely Edward's use of the word "condemn" will be a bit of a lightbulb for her?  He doesn't want to condemn her to this life, that shows he doesn't consider this life a very good one.  But yeah, I understand that her even bringing it up to him was a big deal for her.  I don't get how these two will ever get their issues resolved with all the talking problems they have.  But perhaps Bella will just turn to one of the others to turn her since Edward doesn't want to do it.  It seems like the kind of sneaky underhanded thing that would fit into her upbringing. 

I hate that Edward accidentally hurt Bella like that in trying to protect her.  *sigh*  She lost her spleen!  Not that she really needed it but still.  Do the Cullens not realize that Edward does not intend to live without Bella so if she were to eventually die a natural human death, he will die too?  Or have they simply not had a chance to think that far ahead?

Thanks for the update!

Author's Response:

Hi there Sheeijan!

You are right, indeed. Bella is a very smart girl. And I'm trying to write her as smart but not some super-genius who can figure out every problem put in front of her. (Not that you are implying, I am. :) ). I wanted Edward and Bella both to be shy, very shy, but I kept in mind the shy people that I know. They are married and they manage to communicate. Not perfectly, and often with effort, but they get the job done and have happy marriages. But it took time and practice. And Bella and Edward both have only known each other for a short time, and have been getting practice under stressful circumstances. If you look at their behavior in the front arc, shyness drives a lot of it. I will never write them as having effortless communication, but they won't always be as awkward as they are now. Hope that makes sense.

The Cullens fully intend on turning Bella. So for them, that whole keeping her human and Edward dying when she does deal is not even on the table for consideration. And Mary Alice has been keeping her mouth shut trying to trust Edward to do the right thing when she "does" know what is going on. And because of his powers she is often working blind. She has Edward on her list of people to have a long chat with. Right after her husband. Mate. Er, whatever. :)

Thanks so much,

Books

Well, that was interesting.  Didn't expect James and Victoria to show up!  But honestly, you'd think Edward would know about the sin of pride.  He got overly confident on himself, methinks.  I just hope Bella couldn't hear whatever the noise was. 

Thanks for the update!

Author's Response:

Edward is rock stubborn. That's part of his problem. Delusional and rock stubborn about it. He's been this interesting combination of self-loathing and pride to write.

Thanks Sheeijan for the feedback. :)

Jugurtha is waving at you.

Books

I love this chapter even more.  Bella can sure suprise Edward.  I think she did more than take his queen he may have just been mated and doesn't realize it.

I was wondering when Emily was going to show up.  I was sorry to see her leave so quickly.  I know that it was to show that imprinting is very real and the pack needs to be aware of it - but I thought they might have been able to have more time before anything bad happened.

I love how you are putting in real history and showing the compassion of the Cullens from the very beginning.  The Yorkie family history was quite interesting.

I also love how you are letting people know about very real and dangerous drugs that are out there and in use.

I look forward to the Volutori visit.  This should be interesting.

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

I had so much fun writing that chapter. It's been so hard sitting on my hands in earlier ones when people said Bella was passive knowing what I knew. So I'm delighted that you enjoyed the section. :)

I wrote the deal with Emily the way I did because I never bought into the plot line in the books. If Emily loved Leah and if Emily had a choice - which SM implied the imprintee did, then Emily was heartless in agreeing to be with Sam in the first place and then asking Leah to be her bridesmaid. What a...never mind. Then there is the little problem that Sam shredded her face and yet, even though she told him that she did not want to "date" him or be with him before him fursploding on her, she decides to be with him. Who does that? So what I did in CC was to me the logical outcome of imprinting. And I wanted to show how because the tribe is an oral culture with their traditions that things became lost. Edward and Paula both knew about it, but thought since it had only happened once in the tribe's history that it would never happen again. Now the pack knows otherwise.

I read Farewell to Manzanar years ago, and when I started researching for the chapter decided to add it in. If I recall correctly, Ben Cheney in the books is supposed to be Asian, and I decided that it worked better with Erik Yorkie.

GHB is a huge problem, and has been for a while in the United States amoung younger people. It was important to me that I have a link educating people about it, and I made sure to describe the symptoms as accurately as I could so that if anyone ever does come across it, they know the warning signs.

The Volturi will be entertaining. Promise. :)

Best,

Books

This has been the best chapter so far.  Eve was in love with Liam - who knew.  I guess the whole changing thing is out of the question - but what if she wants it.  I bet that might make a difference in the promises made.  I  Loved the pay back for the practical joke.  I look forward to the date :)

Author's Response:

Hi there Lady Dragona!

Thanks! I had way too much fun writing that chapter. Newborn twister, indeed. Yeah, I went there with Eve and Liam. I wanted to show a human-immortal relationship - one that lasted for 40 years - and one that ended tragically. The issue in this part of the story is that no one bothers to ever ask Bella what she wants. Everyone just makes decisions for her. That is the story of her life thus far.

And I am a big believer in comic karma. Glad you enjoyed it. :)

Best,

Books

thank you for updating, it was seriously action packed. it sucks that bella heard what edward said but it is nice to see them try and confront serious issues instead rof putting them off. i am dissapointed in edward now being limited in his orgasmic kisses. but hey if bella cant have them send each one my way , thanks for updating, im wondering why edwards poers didnt work  like what seemed like through an eternity of battles. i just what him and bella happy.

Author's Response:

Hi there Fleuritup!

Thanks for the feedback! I have never written a battle scene so it was tough to do. I really didn't want to write about limbs gushing venom or blood splurting everywhere. Yes, it does suck that Bella heard what Edward said but it also is, in my mind, a good thing because she needed a wake-up call.  I took away that particular power from Edward for a few reasons, comedy and awkwardness being one of them. How does he tell his sweetie - can't do that anymore. Sorry. No. It's not that you aren't desirable. It's me. I can't.....perform. Really. I know we did that move three times. But seriously. I'm telling the truth.

This will get covered in the next chapter, but I don't mind answering the question. Edward's powers DID work. He just decided they didn't and that made his confidence splutter and then he ran into problems because he lost focus. The fact that his entire family is still alive, Bella too, is proof they worked. Phoenix's power was that he literally could have killled the entire Cullen, Denali, and newborn clan in one fell swoop. Edward prevented it from happening. He just doesn't recognize that because he is so willing to believe that he failed based on what he experienced. Hope that made sense. :)

And I want him and Bella happy, too. We're working on that. They have a ways to go but they will most definitely get there.

 

Best,

Books

Hi there, I had started reading this story about a couple of weeks ago from the beginning and I've got to say that this story is one of the longest and most complicated plots I have ever come across at this site!! That being said it is also one of the most entertaining stories I've ever read!!! I just love the interraction between Edward's two alter egos and find it harlarious!! The venom leakaged testing yeah that is a real hoot too!! I think the last time I left a review was around the stag party for Edward. God that was so so funny!! And the mystery is great too! This story has pretty much sucked me in. Unfortunatly I've only gotten this far! I've got 18 more chapters to go!!

 

Author's Response:

Hi there venus308!

Thanks so much for the feedback! It's my first fanfiction and yeah, I most definitely know that the plot is complicated. I had a few readers suggest that I give summaries before and after the stories and so you'll find as you progress from that chapter on that they become snarkier. The summaries that is. And if you like laughing I have some pretty twisted things you'll run across in the posted chapters. :)

It was a goal of mine when I started writing this to make a complicated mystery. What can I say, I got a little out of hand. :)

But I'm having a blast doing it. And I have so much fun with the predator and SSE. And of the 18 chapters you have left to read, many are about 19k long. so take heart, you have lots of reading in front of you - hopefully entertaining reading.

:)

Starched Shirt Edward is saying a prayer for you.

Jugurtha is leering at you.

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Books