Reviewer: jewelsbyers (Signed) · Date: January 12, 2011 06:14 PM · On: Chapter 12:- One Wedding, One Death, and One Clue

Oh God! Not Jasper! Please, please not Jasper! I doubt he was murdered, that would (no offense) make the story look like a cheap horror movie. Maybe he tripped and hit his head or, I shudder at the thought, killed himself. Of course, maybe he isn't dead at all, but this chapter is titled one wedding, one death and one clue and a drunken, depressed man in the woods could easily kill himself, even accidently! The wedding bit was obvious and is the clue the fact that the Swan house is in the immediate vicinity of the area where Alice was killed? I'm still leaning towards the Swans as the culprits, most specifically Charlie, but I'm wondering if, like any good detective story, you're leading your reader down a winding trail that could skew off at any moment. As for whether James is on the suspect list, I doubt it. I'm wondering if he's a drug dealer and if Alice was his 'middle man', which his why she has LSD on her that night. But he's far to obvious a suspect for it to have been him, then again, sometimes the best place to hide something is in plain sight.

As for making this a series, I don't know. It depends how you would structure it. As in, would the same characters always play the same roles, would you use different scandals rather than murder (e.g. suicides or unexplainable pregnancies) and would it always be the same town? Of course, it's totally up to you but I think it might take away from the originality of the story line were you to make this a series. Just my opinion anyway.

jewelsbyers

Author's Response:

They way I would make this a series would simply to write different mysteries, not always a murder, that occur in small towns. The characters from one story would not cross over into another. They would be totally different.

As for Jasper's fate... you're gonna have to wait for the next chapter.

Reviewer: drJamJam (Signed) · Date: November 26, 2010 03:54 PM · On: Chapter 10- Information

I love the mistery of the story and am constantly trying to figure out who the real killer is. I dont believe it was Bella like her parents think but besides James I can't think of who it is.

Reviewer: jewelsbyers (Signed) · Date: November 21, 2010 08:32 PM · On: Chapter 10- Information

So, it wasn't James, but I already guessed that. I don't think that he was involved with Alice, however coz Chris slipped up when he said that Alice wasn't afraid of James, even after he supposeably gave her a beating. I think that James is/was a drug dealer and I wonder if the caller was being insulting when he called James 'brain damaged' of if he was being literal. It would certainly add an interesting twist to your story. But I am worried that James, Jasper and Rosalie are now all about to get snuffed by this person while he/she tries to cover his/her tracks. Killing Bella is too risky coz that would draw attention to them and attention is something a killer in a small town should avoid. So, now Bella is going to go and question James, Jasper and Rosalie, probably ruin Rosalie's wedding and make a lot of people on the 'wrong side of the tracks' really mad at her. Look out Bella! You just made your life hard! Keep up the good work, Jmftown9. You should know that my love for your story has just gotten deeper with every update.

jewelsbyers

Author's Response:

Thanks for the great review I love reading them. And your right, no one is going to be safe.

Reviewer: Ariana McNeely (Signed) · Date: November 21, 2010 06:43 PM · On: Chapter 10- Information

Chris Duchamp from stand by me.

Author's Response:

You got it. Send me your email adress at Jmftown9@aol.com and I will email you one of the clues. I ask you not to share this with anyone else. Thanks for the review.

Reviewer: iggy2746 (Signed) · Date: October 24, 2010 07:51 PM · On: Chapter 9 - Understanding

Ok, Edward is just a dick! I hope Bella breakes his balls. Alice knew everyone's dirty laundry, looks like it's time for the towns people to join the story I think they have something to do with all this. Am I right? Keep up the good work I love it.

Author's Response:

Than ks for the wonderful feed back.

Reviewer: jewelsbyers (Signed) · Date: October 21, 2010 08:16 PM · On: Chapter 9 - Understanding

And so, the plot thickens! 

My original theory still stands, but I think Edward is being a complete dick by agreeing to go along with the lies of Charlie, Renee and his parents. I'm interested to see how the rest of the town, i.e. 'the-wrong-side-of-the-tracks' kids fit into this, because I know they have to. 

Looking forward to more!

jewelsbyers

Author's Response:

You hit the proverbal nail on the head.

Reviewer: HockeyChick (Signed) · Date: October 21, 2010 06:57 PM · On: Chapter 9 - Understanding

Can't wait for more!

Reviewer: jewelsbyers (Signed) · Date: September 17, 2010 07:34 PM · On: Chapter 8- Choosing Sides

Wow! Whether Charlie killed Alice or not, he sure as hell knows something, if not who did it (and I bet it wasn't the butler!). Good on Bella for standing up to her father, I bet he wasn't expecting that. I can't decide if the story is starting to unravel or has wound up all the tighter! But, I do have a theory:

So, in chapter four, Victoria told James that Bella was going to 'find out' and, later in the story, I think it was chapter seven, we found out that Alice was holding LSD for someone and that Bella was stuffed full of it. My theory is that the drugs belonged to either James or Victoria, perhaps one of them deals, and Alice was their 'middle-man'. As a form of 'revenge' for all the horrible things Bella did to Victoria when they were kids, Victoria slipped Bella some LSD (maybe in a drink?) and Bella started hallucinating. Meanwhile, whoever killed Alice (perhaps it was Charlie) decided that a party would be the ideal opportunity to take her away without too many people noticing. I think the murderer must have been someone Alice trusted, she went with him/her willingly and maybe Bella, hallucinating and frightened, followed, trying to get her sister to help her. When the murderer tries to kill Alice, Alice fights back and Bella, completely terrified, tries to help Alice, but fails. So, the reason she was so traumatized when Jasper found her was because she saw who killed her sister, but her mind has blocked it out so she can't remember.

Update soon!

jewelsbyers 

Reviewer: Aye436 (Signed) · Date: September 08, 2010 08:22 AM · On: Chapter 8- Choosing Sides

My Godness!!! How could you?? I really like to know what Edward knows!!! It's not fair.

And now... I think that one part of my theory is real. I hate Charlie right now, please continue soon!!!

PS Do ya need a new banner??? I could see if I can make one...

Reviewer: HockeyChick (Signed) · Date: September 07, 2010 06:13 PM · On: Chapter 8- Choosing Sides

Poor Bella and Edward! :( Charlie is a douche.

Reviewer: iggy2746 (Signed) · Date: August 29, 2010 11:31 PM · On: Chapter 7- Killer

OK, good story,I'm confused. Please....update soon.

Author's Response:

If your confused email me and I can try to answer some of your questions. Jmftown9@aol.com

Reviewer: iggy2746 (Signed) · Date: August 29, 2010 10:32 PM · On: Chapter 5- Bella's Hell

How could he stop police from looking in her room?or from taking her computer?

Author's Response:

Charlie is a judge, in a small town with a lot of power. Law enforcement give these types of lattitudes to there own, it happens, it sucks but it happens. Also understand that when it comes to the victims families they can stop cooperating. Think Jean Bennett case. They would have no legal reason to actually be in there. You can not get a search warrent for the victims home.

Reviewer: iggy2746 (Signed) · Date: August 29, 2010 10:25 PM · On: Chapter 3- Old Friends

Do parents really do that?.Edward is just so hot.Hope Bella misses him as much as he misses her.